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new BP, new perspective, new joy, new low moment

yet everything under the sun is old. like my desire to control my environment. so if i initiate conversation, i’m expecting it to be reciprocated. and if i stay silent, i’m not expecting questions. but life isn’t about getting my way. it’s about giving and taking and sometimes what i take is rough and i can’t demand otherwise. and other times it’s my attitude that fully determines whether or not what i receive is rough after all.

the over analysis must cease. God, this is me begging for an automatic transformation…no more of the gradual journey stuff. but i am finding the time a blessing. just last night my subconscious was processing to the point of consciousness this morning as i woke up. and if things had happened any sooner, i wouldn’t have seen anything, i would have glossed over the truth.

so thank You.

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