words are my habit.
i’ve often wondered why i don’t feel when things crumble. certain pain just doesn’t hurt me. it has to be close, not close in proximity but close in memory. hotel rwanda hurt b/c it reminded me of liberia. 9/11 didn’t do much. the london bombs didn’t do much.
i wish i could feel pain beyond my memory, but i’m so far removed. so far, i’m not connected. so far, i’m somewhat safely distant enough to not worry. that knowledge confuses me.
It’s Wednesday. Last week Monday, a member of my church died. She was our matriarch. In her honor, we had a time of singing and prayer instead of the usual sermon during our worship service on Saturday. Minutes after worship, I got word that another member had died. She’d been sick for a while and […]
As I got closer to my favorite coffee shop, I could tell it was full but I chose optimism, parked my car and went inside. The owner saw me, smiled, then looked around seeing what I had just seen—not a single seat. I kept looking around; maybe I’d missed one. As my eyes looked left […]
No. I’m not having a wee one. It’s that the days feel as unpredictable as newborn days, unpredictable except for the sleepless part. But replace sleepless with restless. I sleep but I’m worn out. Forever tired. At least 8 days out of 7. And so often wondering, is this it? Is this really going to […]
