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and i will try       to fix you
(quickly insert rich transition music) 
tears stream…

yeah, it’s quite the emotive song. i’d listen to it now were it not for the fact that i’d have to first search for it and secondly, essentially permit myself to bawl my eyes out. i want neither. and so i remain on my blue-green seat cover, the one i bought from Pier One many moons ago because i thought it to be a simple floor cushion. i was later corrected. it was too late. i was too deeply “in like” to say goodbye and much too frugal to purchase the wicker/rattan bench that gets paired with it.

so yes, i’m sitting, laptop appropriately placed on my lap. it was initially cold but has since warmed up on my legs. i should go to bed. i cannot. i’ve got too much swarming my head. they have all collided.

they are the things i usually keep apart, be it by denying their concurrent existence or by creating separate blogs for each. my personal life. my professional life. my personally private-ish life….and the list would go on if i let it. i’ve often remembered the thought i processed a few years back. you should really combine everything. just make a website and call it good. It’s clearly time; they have all collided.

and i need time to unpack each one, individually, and then see how it’s impacting the others and how that collective confusion is driving me nuts. i’m supposed to be a pastor/chaplain person. Perhaps I’ll start my unpacking there.

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