Generated by All in One SEO v5.0.1.1, this is an llms.txt file, used by LLMs to index the site.

# wordhabit

all the words matter.

## Sitemaps

- [XML Sitemap](https://wordhabit.com/sitemap.xml): Contains all public & indexable URLs for this website.

## Posts

- [What I'm currently reading](https://wordhabit.com/what-im-currently-reading/) - I've become one of those 5-or-more-books-at-a-time readers. How? Sometimes I get a little bored. It's not that the book is boring but that my initial excitement over it wanes. Not a great excuse, I know. Other times, I'll take my children to the library so that they can return books and get new ones. As
- [16 years](https://wordhabit.com/16-years/) - Yesterday, April 16, 2026, was 16 years since Matthew died. Or maybe it was April 15th. Time erases things. Maybe that's best, memory loss about the details surrounding a loss. But I haven't forgotten everything. Each April, I know the day is coming when the azaleas start to bloom. Before that day in 2010, I
- [Salvation & discipleship (pt 2)](https://wordhabit.com/salvation-discipleship-pt-2/) - Salvation enables us to enter into a healing journey with God. This journey is discipleship. Let me see what I can do to clarify these words by using a bit of dictionary jargon (in italics) and adding my own understanding. healing...to make sound or whole.Everything won’t be all good until we’re safely collected by Jesus
- [A little peek into how I'm thinking about salvation (pt 1)](https://wordhabit.com/salvationpt1/) - I accidentally wrote "peak"...and I'm reading more than ever...guess I need to study my daughter's spelling bee list with her. In other news, I've been thinking a lot about salvation. I'm often thinking about salvation because I find that there's a close relationship between our views on salvation and other things like our picture of
- [A Psalm for One Unsure of Praise](https://wordhabit.com/a-psalm-for-one-unsure-of-praise/) - How can I forget the Lord's mercy?How can I live as if his forgiveness is fleeting? The sunset reminds me to put the day to rest.The sunrise reminds me to make room for what will come. I am here in spite of what could be;I have yet to become dust. Until then, I will use
- [A Psalm for Those Who Love](https://wordhabit.com/a-psalm-for-those-who-love-012726/) - Lord, when will the ice melt?Oh Lord, when will it be absorbed into the ground like a dog's urine?For centuries, the ground has been saturated with blood that never should have been shed, while ice in all its iterations remains unphased, reinforced by the cold blasts of money meant for mercy not for murder. My
- [It's hard to work when the world is shattering](https://wordhabit.com/its-hard-to-work-when-the-world-is-shattering/) - Like thousands of others, I'm at home today instead of in my office. I have a lot of work to do, things I've just not been able to get to over the last few weeks because I've been stretched and exhausted by other things. Today was supposed to be easy to navigate. While the kids
- [can i get my sight back?](https://wordhabit.com/can-i-get-my-sight-back/) - It’s the first day of class, one of those large classes that can make grad school frustrating. Too many bodies. Too many opinions. Too many reasons to think my ideas aren’t necessarily the brightest. But I respect the professor so I’m here. To my surprise, we don’t begin with the usual introductions of selves and
- [Presence](https://wordhabit.com/presence-2/) - This isn't the type of presence I've been trying to embrace for almost 16 years of clergy life, the type that feels impossible after 3 deaths and 2 funerals, or after a weekend-long event with 80+ college students, the type I run from when the overwhelm kicks in. This ain't that. This isn't the type
- [Some times](https://wordhabit.com/some-times/) - (turn your phone landscape) Some times words just jump into your headYou don’t know what they meanBut somehow they make sense Like love – you’ll think you’re going crazy but your notLike love – you’ll think your sight is hazy but it’s notLike love – you’ll wake up early morning thoughts fast running don’t know
- [Hello world!](https://wordhabit.com/hello-world/) - Welcome to ThemeGrill Demo. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start writing!
- [I think I should say no.](https://wordhabit.com/i-think-i-should-say-no/) - When my second child was three weeks old, I started taking a writing course. Why? Because I needed to do something during my maternity leave. I'd found an in-person course and emailed the professor asking if I could do it online. In two days, he agreed to the arrangement, sent me a $50 invoice which
- [Reflections on Moving](https://wordhabit.com/reflections-on-moving/) - "I don't want to go to school." "Why don't you want to go to school." "Because...because school is not my jam." As I repeated her words back to her, I started to laugh and a grin brightened her face. Then I got corny. "School's not your peanut butter?" "That doesn't even make sense," she dryly
- [Hello world!](https://wordhabit.com/hello-world-2-2/) - Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start writing!
- [Museums, Monuments and the Messiness of Life](https://wordhabit.com/museumsandmonuments/) - All that’s happening with our government is proof that the historical record of museums and monuments makes for nice photo-ops and a bit of education…but only as far as is convenient. Take the children on a field trip, but don’t let the truth of what is seen make room for introspection. The grandeur and intricate
- [Learning to Protest?](https://wordhabit.com/learning-to-protest/) - While so many were able to take their No Kings protest to the streets yesterday, I was helping with the second of three sessions of a lunch & learn series my church has organized where we're unpacking parts of Project 2025. It's a challenging undertaking, not because we're trying to become experts on the document
- [A Short Tale from Maryland](https://wordhabit.com/a-short-tale-from-maryland/) - I wasn't lost. I had the GPS running as I walked in the neighborhood around my office. At a certain point in all of my mostly right turns, my walk felt circular and all the roads I've driven many times looked different enough from my pedestrian point of view to usher in some doubt. I
- [Agreements—Abortion (Part 2)](https://wordhabit.com/agreements-abortion-part-2/) - Story time Many years after the fact and many years after last seeing each other, a former classmate told me that she’d had an abortion. As we talked, I remember wondering what life would have been like for her had she felt safe telling me and others—not in a confessional way but in a “Hey,
- [Abortion—a Conservative Christian Agreement](https://wordhabit.com/abortion-a-conservative-christian-agreement/) - I think of Conservative Christian Agreements as ideas about how we should live that have been agreed upon by conservative Christians for the sake of some sort of control. I don't know all there is to know--I do not at all see myself as an expert. I see myself as an explorer. And in this
- [Real Simple Nostalgia (part 2)](https://wordhabit.com/real-simple-nostalgia-part-2/) - For the first time, I’m struck by the excess, the endless invitations on most pages to spend a bunch of money and to figure out a reason why it’s worth it. Even the bagel spread on pages 144 and 145 of December 2021 is wooing me, causing me to wonder how much better my breakfast
- [Real Simple Nostalgia (part 1)](https://wordhabit.com/real-simple-nostalgia-part-1/) - I’m thumbing through my stash of magazines for what I think will be the last time. They’ve travelled with me, mostly from Athens, Georgia. One or two from Michigan circa 2007. I’ve held onto them because I thought they were beautiful and because they really were especially over a decade ago (maybe closer to 20
- [What are we supposed to say?](https://wordhabit.com/what-are-we-supposed-to-say/) - Don’t speakDon’t speak outDon’t speak out loudlyDon’t speak out loudly today Today is for contemplationToday is for prayerToday is actually for silence We don’t want to make people madWe don’t want to make people sad We don’t want people to think that God has a clear opinion on their politics; in this area of life God
- [The Way We Pray](https://wordhabit.com/the-way-we-pray/) - [Context: US President’s Inauguration] The way prayer was used today was…hmmm…hard to hear. Moments like this make it challenging to think of myself as a Christian. And then I remind myself of my imperfection. Do I have the right to criticize? In my criticism am I speaking a version of the Pharasee’s proud prayer, “God,
- [The Trail](https://wordhabit.com/the-trail/) - I tear up more easily as I age. Just read a bit about a woman who began pastoring in the Seventh-day Adventist Church in 1973. She was an associate pastor then and became a lead pastor in 1979. She was also a Communications and English professor. Her name was Josephine Benton, a trailblazer. She died
- [Morning mumbles (satisfaction)](https://wordhabit.com/morning-mumbles/) - Satisfaction often feels beyond my reality, as if maybe I’d have it if I… And those ellipses lead to nothing fruitful.
- [Things to do (100 words)](https://wordhabit.com/things-to-do-100-words/) - The turtle pendant on my bracelet reminds me to slow down. My eye sockets remind me to get more sleep tonight.
- [The good meetup](https://wordhabit.com/the-good-meetup/) - I’m that person who looks around O’Hare wondering who I know because there must be someone; the world isn’t that big, right? If I could page the entire airport, I would. “Hi folks. My name is Michaela Lawrence Jeffery. At least one of you knows me. Meet me in the F gates.” Twice. Twice I’ve
- [Take Me to the Water: a Baptism Story](https://wordhabit.com/takemetothewater/) - Every year our church had at least one evangelistic series, at least that’s what I recall. At least one. If not three. On some scale. And the best thing about them wasn't that people were giving their lives to Jesus, although of course that's a wonderful thing, but for me at age 7, the best thing about these evangelist series was the baptism at the end.
- [Not When It's Hot: Writing Raw](https://wordhabit.com/not-when-its-hot/) - The writing gurus say not to write about the pain when it is fresh. By that they do not mean not to write about it at all, but not to share it just yet when your skin is still hot, when your brain is still hot. Don't share it when you're still on fire. I've
- [A reminder that you can’t do everything](https://wordhabit.com/a-reminder-that-you-cant-do-everything/) - Some years ago, I was frustrated about not being able to move something forward on the job front. In a conversation with my sister, Abigail, she shared that she understood that frustration first hand and that sometimes others get to see the results of what you began…it may feel unfair, but it’s part of life.
- [We’re used to beating ourselves up](https://wordhabit.com/were-used-to-beating-ourselves-up/) - Ppl: “How’s your new job going?” Me: “It’s hard to take a day off coz I like the people I work with.” Also me: “If this were my first ministry position, it would be kicking my tail just like the first one did. I’ve grown. There are still challenges, but I’m not stressed out like
- [Monday (100 words)](https://wordhabit.com/monday-100-words/) - Mondays are my day off, from what exactly I’m unsure. I sometimes eliminate little emails from my inbox on Mondays, emails I’d rather not see on Tuesday or would, by Tuesday, like to see a new iteration of in the form of the sender’s reply. I try not to work on Mondays so that I
- [sabbatical: week 1](https://wordhabit.com/sabbatical-week-1/) - In no other way could I have known how many cymbals, sirens and bulldozers were tromping around in my head, frolicking like job-less teens in the summertime, except by stepping away from my job for two months. The noise was deafening, overwhelming. What percentage of the noise was inner critic or outer, I don’t know.
- [Buying my life back](https://wordhabit.com/buying-my-life-back/) - The event in this early stage of an essay took place several years ago. One day I’ll finish the essay. The heaviness I felt that afternoon is one I may not forget. So much, perhaps even everything, felt impossible. I’m not sure why I decided to go to a craft store. Did I believe I’d
- [Making the Days Count](https://wordhabit.com/making-the-days-count/) - And I'm learning that to sit with grief (which is sometimes seemingly out of the reach of hope or any warm sentiments) is to honor our capacity to love. At some point the chest hurt eases but I'm not grabbing for that moment.
- [If your picture of God is chaotic](https://wordhabit.com/if-your-picture-of-god-is-chaotic/) - In case you need this reminder or first-time instruction... The Holy Spirit doesn’t guilt-trip us into submission or action. The Holy Spirit can work with us in our guilt-warped state. AND... The Holy Spirit begins peacefully. What begins in peace may ramp up in passion and enthusiasm but -will not manipulate -will not confuse -will
- [The body speaks](https://wordhabit.com/the-body-speaks/) - It’s Wednesday. Last week Monday, a member of my church died. She was our matriarch. In her honor, we had a time of singing and prayer instead of the usual sermon during our worship service on Saturday. Minutes after worship, I got word that another member had died. She’d been sick for a while and
- [The gift of the unexpected](https://wordhabit.com/the-gift-of-the-unexpected/) - As I got closer to my favorite coffee shop, I could tell it was full but I chose optimism, parked my car and went inside. The owner saw me, smiled, then looked around seeing what I had just seen—not a single seat. I kept looking around; maybe I’d missed one. As my eyes looked left
- [Back to the baby days](https://wordhabit.com/back-to-the-baby-days/) - No. I’m not having a wee one. It’s that the days feel as unpredictable as newborn days, unpredictable except for the sleepless part. But replace sleepless with restless. I sleep but I’m worn out. Forever tired. At least 8 days out of 7. And so often wondering, is this it? Is this really going to
- [Pandemic reflections. Good for the soul.](https://wordhabit.com/at-a-time-when-surface-contact-was-a-huge-concern-the-vaccine-wasnt-yet-around-and-healthy-people-were-on-ventilators-we-gave-some-parents-a-bit-more-piece-of-mind-their-children-c/) - Reflecting… Roughly two years ago, my church began hosting the Learning Hub. It would be a semester-long adventure of making sure area elementary school students had a safe place with WiFi in which to do online school. It was a tough journey. There were a few days when we were short on volunteers. One of
- [Reflections (9/28/19)](https://wordhabit.com/reflections-9-28-19/) - We weren't created with the capacity to breeze through these times. Feeling is a gift, even when it hurts.
- [Reflections (9/14/19)](https://wordhabit.com/reflections-9-14-19/) - By writing, I listen, I wrestle, I pout, I jump for joy…I get the stuff out of my head that, left locked up, may make it difficult to carry on with the day.
- [A tribute to Carolyn, to those she loved, and to those who loved her.](https://wordhabit.com/a-tribute-to-carolyn-to-those-she-loved-and-to-those-who-loved-her/) - You can't map out everything. You get a text that someone is back in the hospital. You're out of town. You get back into town and finally visit. You have a great chat, even laughs, and promise you'll be back soon, internally denying the gravity of things. You get back three days later because they've
- [Is that really what it's about?](https://wordhabit.com/isthatreally/) - ...if it's difficult for you to want to have my OB just from me sharing a few stories with you...how do we expect telling people about Jesus to not take time...
- [The Story of Nina (Part 1)](https://wordhabit.com/the-story-of-nina-part-1/) - To Whom It May Concern, Nina was just trying to take two good steps after what felt like a thousand bad ones—a thousand and one if you count the eggs she over-boiled for breakfast that morning. She'd woken up without an alarm, promptly beginning what she hoped would be a manageable morning routine—drink a cup
- [What happens when the unexpected becomes the impossible?](https://wordhabit.com/what-happens-when-the-unexpected-becomes-the-impossible/) - And these unexpected bits have turned into a 5000 piece puzzle that is 5% trees and 95% water.
- [My journey with long covid](https://wordhabit.com/my-journey-with-long-covid/) - Having long covid didn’t seem possible, so I thought, because my illness hadn’t been severe. Maybe the fatigue thing was because I was “doing too much”.
- [I don’t think this is true.](https://wordhabit.com/i-dont-think-this-is-true/) - “There is no reason for this pain.” I keyed each word onto a phone note so as not to forget the insane lesson many of us have been taught, that every bad thing we experience can be chalked up to the hand of God which apparently intentionally drops calamity onto our heads for God’s purpose.
- [Affirmations](https://wordhabit.com/affirmations/) - Some folks are very deep into affirmations, be it giving them to others or memorizing them to give to themselves. I’ve often been the skeptical receiver, assuming the giver doesn’t know me well enough to affirm me and/or is hoping that their affirmation will make themselves feel better about our relationship. Like, “If I can
- [Shifts](https://wordhabit.com/4013-2/) - It's almost 5am and I've been awake for a couple of hours in what has felt like sacred time. I didn't want to wake so early and certainly had no intention of staying awake. But after my 7-month-old began to cry and wasn't settling down too quickly and after a trip to the bathroom, I
- [Everyday Incongruence](https://wordhabit.com/everyday-incongruence/) - We’re living in whirlwinds Sucking up airless moments Fleeting Gasp gasp gasping . We used the metal concert gates as stretchers for the injured for the deceased . She asks me what the red stuff is. I pretend not to know. Two year olds shouldn’t be able to identify someone else’s blood. . How was
- [Clarity](https://wordhabit.com/clarity/) - Want to be an amazing Administration? Okay. But you can't also be an amazing mother. Want to get a PhD? Okay. But you can't also have copious amounts of time in your garden.
- [Kids say some crazy stuff.](https://wordhabit.com/kids-say-some-crazy-stuff/) - This morning, before our assortment of store-bought cereals, homemade granola, and soy milk graced the kitchen table for breakfast, and before our family of four prayed together to begin the day, my four-year-old was asking my two-year-old a problematic question. "How much children do you want to have?" she asked. There are two things wrong
- [advent (day 1) discovery.](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-1-discovery/) - I share two pieces on my podcast. You can also read them, if you'd prefer. Major kudos to the readers. 1st piece: I’m doing Advent my own way. Is that blasphemous? Nah. Here’s what’s happening. I’ve never taken the time to understand what many others celebrate, this seasonal journey into Christmas Day. Advent means the
- [good grief](https://wordhabit.com/good-grief/) - Is the underlying assumption from my questioner that grief isn't just about someone dying but wondering about where they'll end up in the end?
- [(Mis)carriage: processing grace](https://wordhabit.com/miscarriage-processing-grace/) - I say that wishing I could have intervened, wishing I knew how to convince you that losing a(nother) child deserves at least a few days off. Sure, the procedure didn’t require a hospital stay but…oh honey, your heart. I’m amazed. No, not impressed. Amazed. Amazed you didn’t break.
- [Happy reflections on parenting (6 years in)](https://wordhabit.com/happy-reflections-on-parenting-6-years-in/) - I saw a friend's post about the parenting journey that got me thinking about how awesome it is to have a 4 and 6 year old. They can play together and even by themselves. Now that we're fully out of pull-ups, there's less to consider when spending a night away from home and/or going on
- [Day 3. Story](https://wordhabit.com/day-3-story/) - Then Grandpa said firmly, “Kindred, the seeds need us just as much as we need them.” So Kindred reluctantly got up from her napping spot underneath a most perfectly shady tree and followed her grandpa row by row placing seeds into the freshly tilled ground.
- [Day 2. Refresh](https://wordhabit.com/day-2-refresh/) - She said nothing, but her thoughts were loud and clear as she looked at me, head tilted, lips pursed, eyes piercing.
- [A 7-day writing challenge](https://wordhabit.com/a-7-day-writing-challenge/) - Chatting isn’t idle; it’s informative. It quickly gets to the nuts and bolts, skipping the how-are-you-but-I’m-not-listening fluff and jumping right into what matters as they take stock of life from their perches in the evergreens.
- [Episode 20: Later](https://wordhabit.com/episode-20-later/) - This first piece is a reflection on the life of Sojourner Truth. I began reading her autobiography before assembling episode 19. You should definitely listen to that one, too. No Last Name? I’m imagining what it’s like to have no last name—not by the choice loaned to fame but by manufactured color and cast. How
- [sojourner](https://wordhabit.com/sojourner/) - [This entry is one of my recent pieces for my podcast which you can find here.] Wendy writes, "I have sojourner tattooed to my leg." First things first, Wendy. Which leg and where on your leg? Color? Font size? Serif or sans serif? And do you have other tattoos? Alright. Now that the most important
- [Reflections on reading about becoming anti-racist](https://wordhabit.com/antiracism/) - I’m writing even though I have other things I’d rather do such as empty the tray under that plant by the piano, a plant that’s flourishing but I couldn’t name if I tried…
- [Here’s a piece I just had published...and a few lessons learned about writing.](https://wordhabit.com/heres-a-piece-i-just-had-published-and-a-few-lessons-learned-about-writing/) - Uncle John was not my biological uncle but I knew him as “uncle” because he and his wife were very good friends of my mum and dad. They were members of the church my dad pastored and along with their daughters were beautiful people that I came to admire at a very young age. And
- [Start Here](https://wordhabit.com/starthere/) - I started even though I didn’t know everything about podcasting. Well, I knew enough to get started. I knew enough to fail but I knew enough to keep going and growing. Learning comes in stages, no?
- [8:45pm](https://wordhabit.com/845pm/) - It’s 8:45pm. I know because my phone buzzes, reminding me to brush my teeth. Begin winding down, Michaela. Begin acting as if nothing else needs to be added to and crossed off today’s list, the one you’ve made as the minutes tick by, the one where every item has been assigned the three stars of
- [advent (day 7) perfect (pt 1).](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-7-perfect/) - It's a good thing no one ever needs what I knit. Sixteen years ago this past February, I hopped on a plane from Chicago to London. Those were the days of $250 round trip flights. I booked last minute so it was truly a steal and a blessing--I was going to surprise my grandmother for
- [advent (day 6) music.](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-6-music/) - One of the ways to get my dad to overreact is to say the lyric, "I lay me down." By now, I think he loves getting worked up about the lack of substance found in this song. He huffs and puffs while the rest of us laugh. What should we be singing? There's a lot
- [advent (day 5) father.](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-5-father/) - 1st piece: You can read it here: https://wordhabit.com/2020/05/19/nightparenting/ 2nd piece: "What do you want me to learn about you?" This is a simple prayer I prayed tonight before settling down to write, cross-legged on my gray mid-century couch, laptop in tow. It would be horrible if I completed this Advent journey and missed something God
- [advent (day 4) settling.](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-4-settling/) - Listen here:
- [advent (day 3) waiting.](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-3-waiting/) - I share two pieces on my podcast. You can also read them below, if you’d prefer. Major kudos to the readers. 1st piece: What’s your waiting process? You’ve gotta have one, right? Like when you go to the post office and there’s a line. Do you play Sudoku on your phone or check Instagram? And
- [advent (day 2) fear.](https://wordhabit.com/advent-day-2-fear/) - I share two pieces on my podcast. You can also read them, if you’d prefer. Major kudos to the readers. Spotify 1st piece: You can find the original post right here: https://wordhabit.com/2014/07/07/and-then/ 2nd piece: One thing I find fascinating about Advent is that it was originally not only a focus on the birth of Jesus
- [I don't know who needs to hear this, but...](https://wordhabit.com/dothething/) - This smile is confident without flattery. It's bold without bravado. It's gentle. It's comforting and strong. It's contagious even when it's quiet. It's yours, not a copycat pucker.
- [Do I Write or Do I Garden?](https://wordhabit.com/writeorgarden/) - If any of these good looking dark green, deep red, light green, thin, fat, lanky, abundant air cleansers, butterfly attracters, and deer candy end up in the heap of compost behind our fence, I’ll have a few really bad days all in a row. I don’t have enough time for even one. I guess what I’m saying is that I’m not going to write tonight.
- [Hello, Sir.](https://wordhabit.com/hellosir/) - I think that's how I would have addressed youif I'd met youthis side of the Jordan If I cared more about historyI would have admired you longer;I've missed out. But my children will hear about you.Tomorrow I'll tell their 5 and 3 year old heartsA story of non-trendy grit. They'll askWhat color is he?and I'll
- [The Curse of Being Present Yet Unseen](https://wordhabit.com/seeme/) - It was somewhere between 2011 and 2013, I'd guess. I was married but didn't have any children so it was easy to agree to middle-of-the-day activities. I served as an elder in my church and volunteered, along with another elder to take Communion to someone who couldn't attend our worship services. The other elder was
- [Loneliness](https://wordhabit.com/loneliness/) - (From my latest podcast episode. Click here to listen: https://apple.co/2BmmB6o) One listener wrote the following: "In short, loneliness encompasses my life from the past 3-6 months, but really even throughout this past year. The changes happened abruptly. Friends and family moved away. Friends hit life milestones, while I was over here wishing I could be
- [It’s hard to parent at night.](https://wordhabit.com/nightparenting/) - Unconsciously, I’d thought this was a performance. You do the hard prep work, you birth the child and then… Apparently I was waiting for someone to applaud and hand me flowers. They never showed up.
- [Scattered thoughts on grief and memory](https://wordhabit.com/scattered-thoughts-on-grief-and-memory/) - I needed to be alone--it was all too much and just so strange.
- [Is a rock solid romance a real thing?](https://wordhabit.com/rocksolidromance/) - Is a rock solid romance a real thing? The quick answer is a sharp, "No". Now listen in.
- [Is your isolation a blessing?](https://wordhabit.com/is-your-isolation-a-blessing/) - It's incredibly idealistic and a matter of privilege that I can explore the blessings of isolation and also soak them up. I don't pretend to have answers for anyone for whom this currently reality is crushing. These are reflections. [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAr_iQzWl5Q]
- [An invitation for you. Yes, you.](https://wordhabit.com/aninvitation/) - So often we try to condense our world into bullet points. It’s easier that way until it’s not. Our lives are a mess of complex pieces and the words we use to sort through them are each important to our ability to see ourselves and see each other. I'm crafting a podcast space called wordhabit,
- [Lord, hear your people](https://wordhabit.com/lord-hear-your-people/) - Help us, Lord
- [How are you feeling?](https://wordhabit.com/how-are-you-feeling/) - It's a necessary question to ask and answer these days. It's one way for us to take care of ourselves. These are thoughts I penned last Friday night. https://youtu.be/iHaGnAmWbeE
- [I still love you: on sisterhood](https://wordhabit.com/i-still-love-you-on-sisterhood/) - My dearest daughters. I'm writing you this letter because it was the first response that came to mind after seeing a picture that #2 drew for #1. For your own sakes, I'll refer to you as numbers. This is my little way of respecting your online privacy. Thank me later. #2, you were so excited
- [Reflections on taking time to pause](https://wordhabit.com/reflections-on-taking-time-to-pause/) - In the early days of Fall, I sat across from a friend on a picnic bench outside a local coffee shop. The air was just crisp enough to still enjoy the outdoors with a light jacket tucked around my upper body and a warm beverage in hand. At some point, we'd have to end our
- [Becoming a Better Neighbor](https://wordhabit.com/becoming-a-better-neighbor/) - Having neighbors that you actually know and interact with has proven to lower blood pressure and increase overall quality of life. I haven’t done the research but I’ll put money on my expert sounding conclusion.
- [Valentine's Day Craft for Kids](https://wordhabit.com/valentines-day-craft-for-kids/) - It's that time of year. Parents are busy figuring out what to buy or make for their child's classmates. Bits of "love" paper are about to make their way into your home via bags or shoe boxes. Here's something that won't cost a lot and is simple for someone with a printer. Just 8 basic
- [How I'm currently feeling about my home](https://wordhabit.com/home/) - But this morning it’s unsettling slightly—just ever so—to turn south onto Timothy Road...
- [A Christmas Prayer](https://wordhabit.com/a-christmas-prayer/) - You weren't born in December Blah blah blah But you were born Thank you and amen I'm all for being able to accept the gift Life eternal looks good on all of us Maybe this'll be the year you wrap things up Amen again
- [Have you ever made an Advent Calendar?](https://wordhabit.com/a-first/) - I've wanted to do an Advent Calendar with my kids for minute now and have never gotten around to it. This year, I'm a couple days late but I figured out how to keep it low cost and fun--use items I already own (paper, ribbon, clips, tape, computer, printer, the wall) and only buy a
- [Smart](https://wordhabit.com/smart/) - One of my cousins is a neurosurgeon. Yes, that's right. He's a NEUROSURGEON. Now you think I'm even more amazing than before, right? By proxy, while I'm not a neurosurgeon, I must have some good genes unless all his smarts came from his mother. But after knowing his dad, my uncle, and the other siblings,
- [A song](https://wordhabit.com/a-song-2/) - Confusion carved suspicion straight across my chest I heard you call my name Perfection choked the life out of my every breath I heard you call my name
- [destructive nostalgia](https://wordhabit.com/destructive-nostalgia/) - There’s a massive tree that hangs over a road I travel every day. And I haven’t really recognized it’s presence until today as I drove by and saw several men cutting it down. Some things we just don’t pay attention to until the process begins whereby they are taken away. Now we start to cry
- [Decisions](https://wordhabit.com/decisions/) - After a couple rounds of reviewing and tweaking, I finally admitted that I didn't have the power to control the outcome.
- [The magic](https://wordhabit.com/the-magic/) - I kept looking at the list of 2020 sermon topics, chosen because of what I've come to know. Conversations, the ability to listen to what's said and not said, showing up--you learn a lot. The longer I looked at the list, the less confident I felt. Surely, if this is a legitimate list, I'd be
- [But I Don't Want to Witness!](https://wordhabit.com/but-i-dont-want-to-witness/) - Hi Christians. Tired of being told you need to witness? Yeah, me too. You know why? Because we often automatically jump to DOING...as in... "Here's a list of 30 things you can do to show that you love Jesus. Pick 1...pick more if you're a REAL Christian!"* At least that's how it feels. And your
- [Mystery](https://wordhabit.com/4215-2/) - When is it your plan vs your mysterious permission?
- [Amen.](https://wordhabit.com/amen/) - Oh God of commandments too clear to question Commandments that usher us into your presence If we listen May the words of our mouths And the meditations of our hearts* Be transformed in your sight Indicative of our eyes fixed on you Our relationships led by you Our lives surrendered to you Oh God our
- [5](https://wordhabit.com/5-2-2/) - Many days, parenting is a thing I've wanted and never wanted at the same time.
- [Hello, West Africa!](https://wordhabit.com/hellowestafrica/) - To the untrained ear, his tone had been gruff mixed with arrogance. But once I narrowed down his place of origin just a tad, I felt at ease.
- [I’ve been trying to be...](https://wordhabit.com/ive-been-trying-to-be/) - I had to, had to own the effort that's failing me. The disappointment is major but the ability to see it as it is is pure gold.
- [Daydreams and night truths](https://wordhabit.com/nighttruths/) - After I prayed, my oldest got under her covers and said, “Mummy, can we do it like last night?” “Yes, honey,” I replied as my youngest and I snuggled at the foot of the bed under the pink and white cozy blanket
- [This We Pray](https://wordhabit.com/thiswepray/) - Be near us today so close we can't ignore You
- [crying in public...](https://wordhabit.com/crying-in-public/) - I stopped singing. I breathed differently. Tried to convince my body to knock it off. Can't you see where we are? Don't you remember what I do for a living? Can you please stop?!
- [Quote about words](https://wordhabit.com/quote-about-words/) - From his book Jesus Through Middle Eastern Eyes.
- [Divine Friendship...a sermon](https://wordhabit.com/divine-friendship-a-sermon/) - I had the recent privilege of preaching at another church. I preached a sermon that I'd preached a few weeks prior at my church. It was refreshing to be able to connect so much more deeply with the message because it was that much more familiar to me. The sermon begins about 43 minutes in.
- [Fridays can be like this](https://wordhabit.com/fridays-can-be-like-this/) - Days off are a little horrible. Just a little. I'll often have a plan: go to coffee shop, edit writing, buy face wash from Trader Joe's. And then I'll sit down and the only thing I want to do is watch a movie which I don't really want to do. What I really want to
- [i will be your hero, baby!](https://wordhabit.com/i-will-be-your-hero-baby/) - "Extended Deadline." These two words usually usher in a gentle breeze on which one can hear angels singing, "Gloria." Instead, I'm a little frozen, a little scared that I could actually clean up the 1,865 word document that was supposed to be submitted two days ago. It wasn't submitted because I thought I had until
- [Call Him Up -- learning to pray](https://wordhabit.com/call-him-up/) - I'm remembering years ago when email still felt young and social media only existed in MySpace and that one thing with a name I can't recall that had thousands of people from Brazil. I wasn't yet saying everything out loud to my 1,698 friends/kind-of-friends. No. Especially prayer requests. When I had prayer requests, I would
- [unexpected ripples (part 1?)](https://wordhabit.com/unexpected-ripples-part-1/) - (Written back in February. Perhaps I'll complete it one of these days.) I've committed to writing five days a week. I don't publish most of it, not because I don't think it's good. Of course I think it's good! I keep it to myself because I've learned that a large amount of privacy is valuable
- [Joy](https://wordhabit.com/joy/) - I took a quick trip into Facebook world yesterday. I know! What happened to my detox? It's still happening. (And I learned that it's very possible to get on and off Facebook very quickly. Ha!) I was exited to share something. So, I did. It's on our church Facebook page. It's about joy. Have you studied joy in
- [In prayer...](https://wordhabit.com/in-prayer/) - My entire being is craving more time with God. I'm learning to surrender.
- [Detox](https://wordhabit.com/detox/) - Don't you hate it when one of your friends on Facebook posts, "I'm going to take a break from Facebook. See you all later!"? Perhaps "hate" is a strong word. Some people certainly find it very annoying and reply with "Just take a break. Don't announce it!" because announcing it can sound a little self-righteous.
- [The Weight of Race](https://wordhabit.com/the-weight-of-race/) - Several months ago, a friend and I had a lengthy phone conversation about my idealistic vision for community within the framework of a congregation. He talked about the racial component to any healing/growing space. Today, I read a friend’s article about the complex relationship between race, attitudes against women’s ordination, and the lack of supportive
- [forgotten time capsule](https://wordhabit.com/forgotten-time-capsule/) - I opened up my little clock. It was a gift from two of my first students back in 2000. I removed the face in order to figure out what sort of battery I'd need to replace the one that's been very dead for a very long time and was surprised to find a note I'd
- [Slow down.](https://wordhabit.com/slowdown/) - If I happen to experience that miracle of a conversation with myself, I quickly respond with, "I can't slow down. In fact, I'm not doing enough." Or, more likely, I don't respond; I just keep moving.
- [Sometimes it really is a choice](https://wordhabit.com/sometimes-it-really-is-a-choice/)
- [Discoveries & Reminders](https://wordhabit.com/discoveries-reminders/) - Today, I want to share a little bit about some personal discoveries and reminders. 1. A reminder: What we read in the Bible cannot be for knowledge alone but for transformation. So if you have a question about something you've reading in the Bible, by all means seek answers but don't only seek answers so
- [Red Pants](https://wordhabit.com/red-pants/) - I didn’t think it would take this long. Getting myself dressed, that is. I’ve been doing it for at least 35 years. You’d think I’d have figured it out by now, employing some quick system. One piece or two? Two. OK. Pants or skirt? Skirt. Ok. Long or short? Short. I’ll pair with tights or
- [Accountability](https://wordhabit.com/accountability/) - It's possibly the difference between a goal spoken and a goal achieved. We can't be accountable to just anyone. We also can't go solo. How do we choose a good accountability buddy and how should the process of holding each other accountable actually look? I'm positive you could do a quick Google search and discover
- [This dream was nuts!](https://wordhabit.com/this-dream-was-nuts/) - I walk into the airport at 1:15pm for an international flight I was supposed to board by 12:30pm. The flight leaves in 15 minutes. At the counter, the attendant says, “Sorry, the system won’t let us check you in.” On her screen, I can see the boarding and current time both displayed in red with
- [Exhale and run](https://wordhabit.com/exhale-and-run/) - I'm thinking through the need to live by "to thine own self be true" surrendered to "my food is to do the will of the One who sent me." I'm not 100% sure of how that works but then I'm not 100% sure of too many things and that isn't a prerequisite. The unknown will
- [Figuring It Out (day 2)](https://wordhabit.com/figuring-it-out-day-2/) - At some point in your research about writing, you'll read a chapter or an article that highlights effective ways to utilize personal experiences. I'm not sure if it's possible to never take lessons or other experiences from your life as you explore a topic in a creative fashion. The chapter or article will eventually share
- [Figuring It Out (day 1)](https://wordhabit.com/figuring-it-out-day-1/) - Labels can also be freeing. That's what I've experienced over the last couple of months as I've attempted to regularly unpack community, one of my core values. It has now become the exploration of life as a third culture kid.
- [never satisfied](https://wordhabit.com/never-satisfied/) - Today has been quite the mix of activities. It began as usual, waking up with the "It can't possibly be time to get up!" feeling. It included breakfast with my family and then an unplanned (for me) trip to Atlanta to drop off my older sister. She'd considered taking Groome but my dad insisted on
- [...be the same](https://wordhabit.com/be-the-same/) - I just remembered a poem I wrote in French while attending an immersion program the summer of 1999. Like a song, I repeated three lines that spoke to how the summer had changed me and to how different I was from classmates. I wrote it during the final week of six. And then I remembered
- [When you have to say no.](https://wordhabit.com/when-you-have-to-say-no/) - Today, I made a difficult decision. Well, I actually made the decision last night but had to communicate it today. That's always the tougher part, telling someone, "No, that's not going to work and here's why." It's tough because so often "no" is seen as a rejection of the individual versus a rejection of the
- [For International Women’s Day](https://wordhabit.com/for-international-womens-day/) - There are moments in my story--pivotal ones, shaping ones--that have clarified what being a woman is all about and what it's not. Tonight, it's about being a mother, intuitively placing the white trash bin in front of my toddler's face as she sits, freshly showered and night-time-clothed on the bathroom floor. Her stomach has been
- [Birthday musings](https://wordhabit.com/birthday-musings/) - This birthday has been the best, thanks to my Justin. Here’s the deal... (as Ella would say, which she got from Justin) One of the things I’m horrible at doing is maximizing down time. It wasn’t until marriage, 7.5 years ago, that I realized the importance of mapping out vacation plans (not just location but
- [Things I can’t (and don’t want to) change about me](https://wordhabit.com/things-i-cant-and-dont-want-to-change-about-me/) - My lazy eye...well, I wouldn't mind a change My womanhood My womanhood + pastoral call My skin color My low voice My loud laugh My idea generating brain My passion for equipping leaders My idealism My love for music My love for writing My love for coffee shops My love for busy spaces with quiet
- [The Pieces](https://wordhabit.com/the-pieces-2/) - This morning was both "Ahhhh, there's so much to do" and "Ok, God, what first?" I took a moment to analyze the work I needed to complete and the time I had left in which to complete it. Suddenly everything became simpler, possible. It wasn't enough that I knew the tasks--I had to know what
- [Woman Pastor Gratitude](https://wordhabit.com/woman-pastor-gratitude/) - When I realize that washing my hair and putting it up will take less time than braiding it in two ...I say thank you, God When I decide to wear pantyhose for the first time in eons and they don't run ...I say thank you, God When I hand off my baby (who promptly begins
- [What dreams are made of](https://wordhabit.com/what-dreams-are-made-of/) - The rain had begun to pour. My friend Daniela was teaching us (a medium sized group of people standing in the rain) about something and had to walk up a fairly steep hill in order to dodge the car traffic and not get soaking wet. Once up there, she had to come back down to
- [Everything](https://wordhabit.com/everything/) - It’s not a pending doom; I’m not that melodramatic. It is a change, however, and a big one that I know I can’t be perfectly prepared for. That’s part of the problem, really.
- [A Pregnant Silence](https://wordhabit.com/a-pregnant-silence/) - (Written a while back. I'm now 38 weeks.) The internal debate--do I write about myself or politics? Neither is easy but the former is more meaningful at the moment. Here we go. I'm pregnant. We didn't do any big announcement this time around. Like every other time, we told our immediate family first then a
- [Mushy Mummy Love](https://wordhabit.com/mushy-mummy-love/) - We heard her crying shortly after putting her to bed. At first we couldn't quite understand what she was saying through her tears. Then I caught it. "Come wif me." I volunteered to go. Usually my husband goes (and usually it's some terrible time of the night/morning). He'll lay on the floor by her bed until
- [Free Printable 2017 Calendar](https://wordhabit.com/free-printable-2017-calendar/) - I like to create things that I think are pretty. This will go onto my office wall. Feel free to add it to yours. Basic goal: To have a quick way to figure out the date (not meant as a planner) To have a place to record a few details that I consider key Included:
- [a healthy discontent ](https://wordhabit.com/a-healthy-discontent/) - I woke up shortly after 5am and my brain began to process, making it impossible to get back to sleep. It's been a while since this has happened--reflecting on the day before, questioning my choices, frustrated by my silence, over analyzing my analysis. Perhaps what I've left unsaid is for the best. Perhaps not. Time
- [I don't fail tests](https://wordhabit.com/i-dont-fail-tests/) - There was, however, a crazy amount of emotion running through my blood. And when I talked to God, I held nothing back, including the tears.
- [yet...part 1](https://wordhabit.com/yet-part-1/) - She woke up around 1:30am with her usual 6am greeting of "I'm awake!" She often has other things to say, too, but this morning she kept it simple. Poor thing couldn't keep sleeping due to her coughing, wheezing, feverish body. We went to her aid, hoped a little attention and some vaporub was all she
- [Less = Sanity (a daily list)](https://wordhabit.com/less-sanity-a-daily-list/) - October 22 Pondered life as I drove home Decided to quit some things Asked God for guidance Made a list of almost ten things Felt relief just from making the list Picked three things on the list to start with Started one before sleep October 23 Woke up naturally before 5 Couldn't go back to
- [all my children](https://wordhabit.com/all-my-children/) - i want to carry all my children on my back and in my arms i want to smell their all-day-playing sunscreened heads then watch them as they drift away down deep in slumber unconsumed by weighty thoughts freshly bathed in calming bubbles prayers ascended kisses lavished uncontrollably i want to carry them my longed-for babies
- [Goldfish, Boogers, and Conversations with God](https://wordhabit.com/goldfish-boogers-and-conversations-with-god/) - I had every intention of writing about this earlier today but a later conversation with a treasured friend solidified my need to record these thoughts. If they are meaningful to you also, amen. This morning included a very challenging moment for me as a young mother. My child was tantrumming on that please-don't-ever-do-this-in-pubic level and
- [Suffragette Salad?](https://wordhabit.com/suffragette-salad/) - I used what was part bathroon, part hallway then sat down in a chair there. The door opened a bit later and in walked a young woman from Mauritius. She'd just arrived. Her mother and a young man who was like a brother to her walked in with her. She was so excited to be
- [All This. ](https://wordhabit.com/all-this/) - As the sun sets and our little one sleeps in her new "big girl bed," I'm finding myself reflective and very grateful. I'm looking out our back yard and thinking, "We have all this to enjoy!" which isn't simply about the tall, old trees or the old house or the plants we've labored over. It's
- [fame & faithfulness](https://wordhabit.com/fame-faithfulness/) - Wrote this draft in February 2015. Just came across it. Quite fitting this week. --- i wanted to be big time, bigger than Michael Jackson, until i realized that an Adventist would never be that big. no stage lights for me. no swarms of fainting fans. no hours of epic choreography. and these days, a
- [Not a Eulogy ](https://wordhabit.com/not-a-eulogy/) - I can't unsee so I will not look The body, the force, the falsified book Another story skewed by thoughts Of what could be but what was not I can't unhear so I will not turn On the yells, the shots, and learn For myself. I'll trust my friends "He wasn't guilty enough to die
- [unexpected gratitude](https://wordhabit.com/unexpected-gratitude/) - All I could think of once I got close to the statue was, "put down the lilies and keep on walking." And that's what I did.
- [when you think you're the only one](https://wordhabit.com/when-you-think-youre-the-only-one/) - I don't remember this in real life but in my dream, the memory flooded back and I agreed. Yes, I'd almost quit. And in that moment, I realized that I'd almost quit all these beautiful people.
- [Advice you didn't ask for. ](https://wordhabit.com/advice-you-didnt-ask-for/) - I once WebMD'd my symptoms for something-or-another and narrowed my diagnosis down to Meningitis. I know I'm not alone in this area of crazy behavior.
- [big/bad conclusions](https://wordhabit.com/bigbad-conclusions/) - I read a piece a few days ago that was so well written, a true breath of fresh air. So, of course, I'm that much more determined to produce top notch work. Of course. It's definitely something I can whip up every single time I put fingers to keys. And it shouldn't take too long.
- [](https://wordhabit.com/3361-2/) - But how do we also speak to now? How do we do so with grace?
- [the stories we tell](https://wordhabit.com/the-stories-we-tell/) - There are stories we tell ourselves in order to make the moment better or at least OK. Whether based on fact or fiction, these explorations of life give our lives more...more time, more comfort, more hope, more clarity... We feel a reprieve.
- [Jesus has hair](https://wordhabit.com/jesus-has-hair/) - I didn't know Jesus needed his hair done, all three feet of him, medium brown skin. She was (and is) absolutely adorable. Middle Child Syndrome rings through her slender build. She's use to being at fault. What are you going to do for the rest of the day? I'm going to behave. It's more
- [a strange friendship...](https://wordhabit.com/a-strange-friendship/) - And even after discovering that I don't know her that well, after all, I still believe I can trust her.
- [no dogs allowed](https://wordhabit.com/no-dogs-allowed/) - There's always something...reminding me that I can't always have the order I crave...
- [A mother's dreams](https://wordhabit.com/a-mothers-dreams/) - It's hardest when I'm the driver. I hear her desperate little voice ask, "Hand?" So I reach back, even though a shoulder/neck kink is sure to follow, and I hold her hand. I do it because her toddler heart and mind can't push through whatever current frustration is making hand-holding essential. She shouldn't have to
- [over it.](https://wordhabit.com/over-it/) - It's as if short snippets are all I've ever known. The daily "I should post that" thought is killing me--figuratively, of course. There was a time when long prose pieces were my thing. I didn't just want to write; I wrote and I wrote a lot. I wrote poems. I wrote about my day. I wrote a
- [Again...m#2](https://wordhabit.com/again-m2/) - I showed up prepared to pray for others and ended up praying for myself, too. Even got to pray twice because the Rabbi wasn't there. Not sure what happened to him but God used his absence to feed my soul, work away at my heart, remind me of His presence...that it is even with me. I
- [](https://wordhabit.com/3150-2/) - She stood in her crib, legs anxiously shuffling as she let out frustrated cries and signed vigorously. In the darkness, I could feel her hands on my cheek as I bent down and held her in place, rubbing her back and gently saying, "No milk, baby. No milk." It felt as if we were growing
- [i don't promise eloquence, just words.](https://wordhabit.com/i-dont-promise-eloquence-just-words/) - There's so much in my little world that currently has something to do with race, race relations, and racism (nothing against me, that I know of, but involving people/entities that I know and/or am impacted by). It's easy to feel a bit overwhelmed by it all, to wonder what to say or if to even
- [Hair today...](https://wordhabit.com/hair-today/) - (This was written on Feb 6, 2016.) She watched me wash my hair the other day. I felt as if it were a black history moment because she'll never know what it's like to sit in between my knees and have her hair detangled. It's not looking likely, anyhow. Her hair has big wispy curls
- ["no" = "I don't love you"?](https://wordhabit.com/no-i-dont-love-you/) - We're afraid to be honest but when we are honest we're afraid to be wrong so then we lose all sense of gentleness. It's a mess.
- [...processing ](https://wordhabit.com/3041-2/) - It's the last day of the year and I have many regrets. I'll fill your eyes with none of them, at least not in full detail. Why bother? They're in the past. Yet I bring them up because I've grown up with the message that we shouldn't have regrets and, well, I think that's unrealistic.
- [ask & try, ask & try](https://wordhabit.com/ask-try-ask-try/) - My friend and fellow campus minister, Heather, and I often joke about the things we do in our jobs that Seminary didn't teach us. These things typically fall into the "pesky" box. We'd rather ignore them, delegate them, toss them out the window...but can't. Today another such thing fell into my lap. I suppose I
- [cars, food, babies](https://wordhabit.com/2976-2/) - I couldn't just Facebook this. I had to blog so that I can more easily return to this memory when she's 16 and we're discussing the complex yet uncomplicated nature of boys. Today I ate lunch outside of our house while sitting in the car. No, it wasn't food I picked up en route. It
- [God, help us. ](https://wordhabit.com/god-help-us/) - Just heard a news headline about other states wanting to adopt a TN law that makes it possible to charge as criminals mothers who birth a drug-dependent baby. Many of these mothers aren't getting prenatal care... So what happens to these mothers and what happens to their babies? Whether they choose jail time or rehab,
- [Some things I'll never know](https://wordhabit.com/some-things-ill-never-know/) - I haven't anything brilliant to say. I'm simply thinking about how vastly different this life is from the place I currently call home. Sometimes I wonder what growing up here would have looked like. Would we have stayed in South London or moved out? Would these streets be familiar to me? Would I be married
- [Remember](https://wordhabit.com/2967-2/) - [wpvideo ic9gilNb] I've never been one who cared to remember dates during history classes. It felt like a chore--chores were dull. And as a result of my "I don't care" attitude (which probably stemmed not from truly not caring but from being frustrated by the effort it took to remember) there's much even beyond dates that
- [...through a glass, darkly...](https://wordhabit.com/through-a-glass-darkly/) - I'll never forget the moment my professor quoted this line. He used it as a way of explaining our current lack of understanding. I was so excited. I wanted to scream, "He just quoted the Bible!" but instead, I kept my excitement inside. After all, this was a public school and I didn't need to
- [One roll at a time](https://wordhabit.com/one-roll-at-a-time/) - I've been reading a book that has challenged me to reduce the noise in my life. From the clutter on my desks (home & work) to the clothes and shoes I no longer wear to the unnecessary time I spend on social media, the noise must be reduced. Eradicated would be even nicer but I'm
- [Oh Candy!](https://wordhabit.com/oh-candy/) - I live in a beautiful, old neighborhood and I'm learning to become an intentional neighbor. It's not easy. I often worry that I may come across as overly interested, in that awkward zone of, "You don't know me that well so why are you at my door with cookies, crazy lady?" It's as if I'm
- [according to plan](https://wordhabit.com/according-to-plan/) - We had our evening planned. Bathe child. Eat supper. Head to church for communion. Then we texted friends. Up for a visit? We'll swing by on our way to church. They were up for it so we got to meet their new baby boy. Our decision was last minute but lovely. Then we went to church.
- [Well in this family we...](https://wordhabit.com/well-in-this-family-we/) - I'm now that parent saving phone numbers according to my child's friend's name. (First name) Carol (Last name) Timothy's Mum And I have to navigate the awkward stuff from hearing how our children interact at preschool to figuring out the best way to respond to a Halloween invite on the spot. "We actually don't do anything."
- [growing pains. ](https://wordhabit.com/growing-pains/) - One of the toughest aspects of communal life is being vulnerable, especially with those in a different stage of life. Why? Because we're not always tracking together, we're not always able to understand each other's story to a point of empathy and the respect which yields confidentiality and all-around emotional safety. So when I share
- [...then I am strong ](https://wordhabit.com/then-i-am-strong/) - I'm kinda sad. It's almost over. Some students have already left. The rest will leave in roughly an hour. They're not the same ppl they were when they arrived Friday night. It's good. It's beautiful. They're connecting across campuses. They're laughing about now common experiences. They already have inside jokes. They've built community. They are
- [she > stuff](https://wordhabit.com/she-stuff/) - It has been a long time since I've thumbed my way through a post while our little one lays fast asleep on my arm. (Lays or lies? I don't have time to google it. Time is short.) I have a baggillion things to do today and wanted to be in the car by 9am with
- [things.](https://wordhabit.com/things/) - right now there are a lot of things going on, a lot of things to attend to, a lot of things to process, to make decisions about, to answer, to make more time for, to let go of, to celebrate, to bury, to fight harder for, to confront, to whine about, to delegate, to cry
- [Burning Bridges Smell Bad](https://wordhabit.com/burning-bridges-smell-bad/) - I was 21 with nothing to lose, or so I thought. Here's the story. Well, it's not much of a story now. I've forgotten most of it after 15 years. The anger has died and I don't even remember what fueled it. I just remember being MAAAAD, so mad that I wrote a letter to the
- [strong wills are for babies](https://wordhabit.com/strong-wills-are-for-babies/) - I'm oddly emotional. After roughly 30 minutes, she finally laid back, cradled her pink sheep-head blanket, and fell asleep. It's the weirdest thing. You want your child to be independent (I do, anyway), and at the same time, you want your child to do what YOU know she needs to do. You see her strong will
- [unclean--online book club](https://wordhabit.com/unclean-online-book-club/) - just got my copy. stay tuned.
- [things adults do ](https://wordhabit.com/things-adults-do/) - As I reflect on a few unrelated events, I'm inspired to create a list of things adults do. There's no hierarchy to the list coz ALL the items are important. My husband contributed a few to the mix, too. Here goes. Things Adults Do: Work hard Don't make excuses--take the shame then do better Shower--after
- [no skateboards allowed](https://wordhabit.com/no-skateboards-allowed/) - I was ready for them--two kids, skateboards in hand, walking toward the front of Advent House. I was ready to tell them off for skating down the front steps and railing, waiting in my "dare you to try" posture. I couldn't have them destroying what seemed to take all of last summer to fix. Not
- [500: now](https://wordhabit.com/500-now/) - The plants need watering. It's best to do it at the coolest part of the day. That would be now. I have a sermon to write and the order of service pieces need to be in by today. I should work on that now. We have travel plans. It always takes a bit to not
- [why 500](https://wordhabit.com/why-500/) - It's a challenge via an app I have that encourages you to set goals and reach them. It didn't seem at all daunting when I found it. 500 words? In my sleep! Well, maybe not. It's actually been very hard. In my attempts to write every day, I've found three things to be true: I
- [war stories](https://wordhabit.com/war-stories/) - It's easy not to pay attention, not to care. It's not my family's history. It's not my native land. But ever since moving here, I've wanted to know more and, thankfully, my husband is also a forever student. So we went to the cemetery, baby and one set of grandparents in tow. It was beautiful.
- [500: pacifiers and other whole matters](https://wordhabit.com/500-pacifiers-and-other-whole-matters/) - She reached over and picked it up in a manner that spoke to ritual, to surrender. It's nap time; I should get my pacifier. That's what we call it. No abbreviations or nicknames. Pacifier. I'm determined to teach her whole things, real things. I don't want her to be 7 thinking Adam and Eve ate an apple.
- [500: breaking rules, baking bread](https://wordhabit.com/500-breaking-rules-baking-bread/) - For a Sunday, we were up early--one of the perks of having a baby. Before eating breakfast, I decided it'd be nice to make a sweet bread of some sort, something quick, a little sugary and a lot tastey. Baking isn't unusual for me. Neither is baking bread nor baking something for the first time.
- [500: Sabbath](https://wordhabit.com/500-sabbath/) - It's an appropriate topic given the day, the 24hr rest, the come-away time, the break, the long nap, the escape, the excuse to go nowhere, the convenient practice, the reason for not doing homework, the reason for not clocking in, the oddest day of the week, the most special time... I keyed in that paragraph
- [500 words](https://wordhabit.com/500-words/) - I have one particular goal: to live more fully than I have been. Sure, that could manifest itself in a ton of ways. Too vague! Ok. Here are a few specifics. Write more. It's the way I process best so why not make the time to take advantage of a good thing? I'm starting by
- [still...](https://wordhabit.com/still/) - When where you are isn't where you thought you'd be... When you didn't necessarily have a clear sense of where you'd be but your current state is surprising...and stings... When you want the memories to stop holding such weight... When you know someone will provably accuse you of over sharing... When you freeze a little
- [ants & trust](https://wordhabit.com/ants-trust/) - i'm an "i can do this" sort of person which often creates a lot of frustration in my life. why? because my efforts often teach me that i actually don't have what it takes--the skills, the time, the support, the wisdom, the long suffering, the...you name it. yet, disappointment doesn't stop me from trying, once
- [quick. look back. ](https://wordhabit.com/quick-look-back/) - Have you ever looked back at ideas/plans you noted years ago? Memory lane can be quite surprising.
- [assumptions ](https://wordhabit.com/assumptions/) - You're in a grocery store. You see a man with a child. They're clearly comfortable together. You a. think he's babysitting. b. think he's the dad and that this must be his hour, day or week to have the child. c. think he's the dad, period. It's no big deal. d. realize your answer depends on the race of the
- [she sleeps for an hour...and other tales. ](https://wordhabit.com/she-sleeps-for-an-hour-and-other-tales/) - My daughter's latest thing is fighting naps. I think she's becoming more sensitive to any irregularities in her schedule. So, 20 minutes beyond nap time equals wailing and gnashing. Okay, not quite, but she does have this new cry that makes you want to melt down, too. I just put her down for a nap.
- [Of Wills and Love](https://wordhabit.com/of-wills-and-love/) - Arguments with almost five-month-old babies are very short. It began with her ridiculously fast-growing fingernails. She's obviously draining me of all contributing nutrients. After concluding that I'd been scratched enough, I decided to cut her nails. My daughter has gotten used to the process, one I conduct while she's awake so that I don't have
- [There Is A Season (Turn, Turn, Turn)](https://wordhabit.com/there-is-a-season-turn-turn-turn/) - Something that continues to surprise me these last few weeks is when the thought, "I should really pray" is automatically followed by Dear God above Hear my prayer Thank you for your love and care Amen. It's the first prayer in my daughter's bedtime prayer book. There are about five more prayers. I know each
- [The most valuable trait in the job market](https://wordhabit.com/the-most-valuable-trait-in-the-job-market/) - This trait will keep you in a job and keep you doing well at that job! It's definitely a trait that develops with age but also, and perhaps more so, with a willingness to go deeper and be better.
- [Just One More Kiss](https://wordhabit.com/just-one-more-kiss/) - It's hard to let her go. 2:45am comes. I feed her. And then it's 4:30am and I'm waking up with her still in my arms. I finally surrender to the reality of my own sleep needs and return her to her bed but only after ten more kisses to her cheeks. She settles down quickly.
- [My Girl & My God](https://wordhabit.com/my-girl-my-god/) - I know, I should be sleeping. Sleep when the baby sleeps. Yeah yeah. I've got thoughts running through my head that must be sorted through. So here I go. A couple of nights ago, I was done. I mean, not really but it felt like it. It felt like confusion frustration and helplessness had gotten
- [The Right to Breathe](https://wordhabit.com/the-right-to-breathe/) - Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being. (‭Genesis‬ ‭2‬:‭7‬ NIV) I believe we've all been given the right to breathe ever since God breathed into Adam. But we've disrespected the work of the
- [#ferguson. Scattered thoughts. Part 2.](https://wordhabit.com/ferguson-scattered-thoughts-part-2/) - (I don't pretend to have clear answers to all this mess. But I know there are things I can do and one of those things is write. I pray for wisdom to discover the others.) I was probably 19 when a group of us college kids got together, came up with a strategy and presented
- [the unfair](https://wordhabit.com/the-unfair/) - I'm laying in bed with my daughter asleep on my chest. Well, I'm not really laying. I'm in some this-will-hurt-badly-later position that resembles laying. Anyway, I can't help but think of my friend whose little boy is fighting to live at 24 weeks old. This world is a mess. I get to spoil my daughter
- [my current situation](https://wordhabit.com/my-current-situation/) - We quickly and quietly hunker down for the night after she's asleep. Well, it's not yet "for the night" but more like "for the 2 to 3 hour segments she'll bless us with." We bring up people and situations to pray for, all in hushed tones, and then we pray. And I've honestly asked God
- [Ella](https://wordhabit.com/ella/) - It's crazy. You'd think that after nine intimate months you'd be able to say you know someone. And then the doctor presses down hard on your stomach, pulls carefully yet powerfully and she appears. You knew she'd be a big baby but not this big. You knew she'd have hair but not jet black. You
- [Truth Telling](https://wordhabit.com/truth-telling/) - I'm so happy. Today is my last day of Heparin. Filling a syringe and then injecting it is annoying. Lovenox is so much simpler. These aren't words I ever thought I'd say. I almost cried the first few times I injected Lovenox into my stomach fat. Now I'm a prescription drug shooting pro with anticoagulant
- [yes, i really am ok](https://wordhabit.com/yes-i-really-am-ok/) - ask me again tomorrow. tuesday may roll in with tears and gnashing teeth but just for now, all is well. that's how it's been for a while now. good one day, bad the next. feeling whole one moment and empty the next. energized and then gross as acid reflux strikes yet again. and i'm one of
- [#sabbathing](https://wordhabit.com/sabbathing/) - A friend from seminary introduced me to this via her twitter feed. For all my life, sunset Friday to sunset Saturday has been Sabbath--24hrs of rest from regularly daily rhythms. I didn't come to value it until college. In grad school I questioned it quite seriously and re-learned its value. The rest of my life
- [...and this is love (prego edition)](https://wordhabit.com/and-this-is-love-prego-edition/) - I post a lot about being pregnant and I'm sure that folks are really tired of seeing my Facebook updates on the matter. The pics. The statuses. Oh, the hashtags. I probably used to be really sensitive about not dwelling on one thing for too long, changing up subject matters and such. 9 months ago,
- [#ferguson. Scattered thoughts. Part 1.](https://wordhabit.com/ferguson/) - (Forgive my lateness...I've been mulling over this for a while, unsure of how to talk about it. The other night I couldn't sleep and the words began to form. I finally added more days later.) I don't follow the news very closely--I simply don't make the time. But some things are hard to ignore like
- [dreams and such](https://wordhabit.com/dreams-and-such/) - For two nights in a row, I've had dreams that reveal my fear, a fear I didn't even know I had, a fear that I won't get to see my daughter. I know. Sounds crazy, right? Two nights ago, I dreamed that because of how out of it I'd been after delivery, I had no
- [if i can help somebody](https://wordhabit.com/if-i-can-help-somebody/) - today i woke up in a bit of a funk. i'm an idealist. i woke up knowing i'd slept but not feeling rested. bumber #1. and that's all it took to begin my focus on things i cannot control. like whether or not those i minister to and with are receiving proper spiritual nurture at
- [and then...](https://wordhabit.com/and-then/) - (from june 24, 2014) when you haven't yet cried over something and then the flip is randomly switched... it's such a vulnerable space. the tears flow as if to say, "dare us to stop," and you know it's good and right and real and honest. and still. it confuses while simultaneously clarifying. you could have
- [you thought you were hungry but you're actually dehydrated](https://wordhabit.com/you-thought-you-were-hungry-but-youre-actually-dehydrated/) - I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong. For now, I'll believe I'm right and I drink accordingly. I'm pregnant, you see, and things are happening to my body that I never could have imagined in either my most creative or delusional moments. One of the latest of these great wonders is feeling sick
- [mother's day: is it for me?](https://wordhabit.com/mothers-day-is-it-for-me/) - a year ago yesterday, i sat at the end of the church pew and cried. i couldn't help it. i couldn't stop it. each tear effortlessly streamed down my face. why? because the children were handing out flowers to mothers but not to me. i tried to prep myself the day before, reading a blog that
- [the steps we wish we didn't have to take](https://wordhabit.com/the-steps-we-wish-we-didnt-have-to-take/) - O'Hare's C concourse is as full as ever. As usual, I hope to run into someone I know, particularly someone I haven't talked to in years. What good are long layovers otherwise? I'm en route to Michigan. There I'll definitely see people I haven't seen in a good while. There will be hugs and moments
- [complicated giving](https://wordhabit.com/complicated-giving/) - i experienced something really interesting this afternoon. well, it began earlier this week, probably monday. here's the story. seeing as finals are upon college students, i thought of some small way to lighten the load of two. any two. i purchased two gift cards from a local eatery, typed up words of encouragement, put them
- [Greeter](https://wordhabit.com/greeter/) - I don't consider myself the greatest conversationalist. Never have. But I'm learning to be present and engage honestly. So dead space isn't tough to navigate and active listening yields real exchanges.
- [knitting is the truth (lowercase "t" of course...)](https://wordhabit.com/knitting-is-the-truth-lower-case-t-of-course/) - I'm finding so many life lessons in Knitting Yarns: Writers on Knitting. You should read it. Good writing. Fascinating stories. Even a few patterns interspersed.
- [when TV makes you cry](https://wordhabit.com/when-tv-makes-you-cry/) - trust me. this used to NEVER happen. i was the girl watching the sad movie with a bunch of other girls and magically maintaining the only dry eyes in the room. but the last decade of life has changed all that. i now cry easily. it's typically not the sappy romantic stuff that gets me.
- [Here](https://wordhabit.com/here/) - Sometimes life surprises and beauty appears on walls, in jokes, with food and with people you never would have thought could be one big crazy college family. God's grace is visible here.
- [](https://wordhabit.com/2470-2/) - i typically write when i have a clear idea of what i want to say. those moments are loaded with energy, excitement, readiness and there's almost an urgency--these words must be shared. so when a day like today rolls around, a day without "ah ha" moments to speak of, it's easy to find more joy
- [not yet 35](https://wordhabit.com/not-yet-35/) - i'm finally getting around to doing something i've wanted to do for AAAAAAAGES! and here it is. simple and hopefully useful especially if you're not yet 35.
- [i'm guilty & i kno...NO, NO I'M NOT](https://wordhabit.com/im-guilty-and-i-kno-no-no-im-not/) - i'm sure i felt great guilt each time i neglected to practice my flute. even though the flute lessons following those lazy high school days contained amazingly beautiful sounds, i'm sure i felt really bad for not following my teacher's instructions. i'd listen to James Galway and dream of when we'd one day be friends,
- [untitled](https://wordhabit.com/untitled/) - i wrote this (probably in 2011) on the back of a letter i was given and in response to that letter. i found it yesterday while cleaning. what one person reads as another's judgement, the other person reads as their attempt to inform. he sees himself as accepting and wanting to enter into a relationship
- [...and then I remembered.](https://wordhabit.com/and-then-i-remembered/) - I was just talking with someone I greatly respect and love. She's younger than me by a few years. For a moment I wondered if she looks up to me... And then my mind jumped to women older than me who I look up to. And if I wanted to talk with one of those
- [vacation mode](https://wordhabit.com/vacation-mode/) - 3 goals: relax, read & write
- [VOTE for CNN to air ireport #findTeleka](https://wordhabit.com/vote-for-cnn-to-air-ireport/) - This will take you mere moments to complete. The link to vote is at the bottom of the report. Vote and share! Let's do what we can to #findTeleka. And if you're in Gary, IN, join the family today in handing out flyers! http://ireport.cnn.com/docs/DOC-1068285
- [Please help find Teleka Patrick](https://wordhabit.com/please-help-find-teleka-patrick/) - I know Tenesha, Teleka's sister. So I know this is real. Please share in your networks especially if you're in the Midwest.
- [Granola. Homemade. Yum.](https://wordhabit.com/granola-homemade-yum/) - 8 cups rolled oats 1 cup almonds 1 cup walnuts 1 cup pecans 1 1/2 tsp salt 1/2 cup honey 1/3 cup oil 1 tbsp cinnamon 1 tsp vanilla 1/2 cup brown sugar Preheat oven to 325F. Mix oats & nuts in big bowl. Mix everything else then add to dry mix. Spread in baking
- [with us](https://wordhabit.com/with-us/) - *i'm listening to "Angels We Have Heard On High" and pondering the phrase "God with us". toddlers act very differently when they believe their parent is with them. they jump off the couch. they fling their heads backward. they know their parent will catch them, stabilize them...they'll be fine. we call them naive. indeed they
- [going back to chicago](https://wordhabit.com/going-back-to-chicago/) - Sometimes I go back to Chicago in my mind. It's not like going there physically. It's riskier. It's reliving memories of what used to be, putting on my silver, pinky, fish ring. I return to grad school, to wanting to teach English lit., to talking with Vershawn about must-read books like Sula. I return to
- [unpacking my unpacking](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-my-unpacking/) - unpacking my unpacking is an analysis-lover's dream. (said somewhat sarcastically...) take a listen. let me know your thoughts. *correction: i do remember and like details, particularly in my work life. but i don't remember the ins and outs of what went down long, long ago.
- [unpacking day 7: holding on](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-day-7-holding-on/) - this is mr. pup. he's one of my oldest memories. i think i purchased (via my parents) him at a school rummage sale. at one point, my older sister and i argued over who he belonged to. somehow i won. i've never known myself to sleep with stuffed animals and yet i've kept him around
- [unpacking day 6:](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-day-6/) - it's a little wooden elephant. through the years, it has occupied various spaces...typically the top of a dresser. i've had it for most of my life now. there aren't many things i can say that about. this was given to me by an elementary school classmate. i'm guessing it was part of a gift exchange.
- [upacking day 5: through a glass darkly](https://wordhabit.com/upacking-day-5-through-a-glass-darkly/) - this is so weird/providential(?). i'm not sure which. i like to attribute things to God based on truth not out of convenience and right now i'm quite unsure of how to read into the fact that today's picture represents my sight coupled with the reminder that two years ago a dear friend died. you may
- [unpacking day 4: home](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-day-4-home/) - After living here and living there, "So where's home?" has become a difficult question to answer. Another version of it is, "Where are you from?" which typically assumes a succinct, "I'm from X," response. I don't know whether to feel privileged or lost as I begin my answer with, "Well (pause)..." At one point in
- [unpacking day 3: growth](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-day-3-growth/) - I'm already behind. For shame. Yesterday's post has become today's. Guilty. Head is hung low. Ok. That's enough perfectionistic self-pity. On with the post! This little plant has been sitting on our kitchen counter for weeks now, since mid-July to put it into perspective. Our kitchen has two incomparable sky lights which make the kitchen
- [unpacking day 2: saying "yes"](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-day-2-saying-yes/) - once upon a time there was a mug. it was dark blue with a simple line graphic depicting a one-on-one tutoring session. Vinas (sp?) gave it to me. he was (and perhaps still is) the director of UIC's writing center. as part of my first year as an English Comp GA, i spent time honing
- [unpacking day 1: creating](https://wordhabit.com/unpacking-day-1-creating/) - i haven't always understood why the ability to make something out of something else is important to me. several childhood memories, though sparse and probably inaccurate, find me taking apart an old stereo, developing a new card/board game (and teaching my family how to play), preferring legos over barbies (though barbies possessed a sort of social
- [UNpacking: a 31-day writing challenge](https://wordhabit.com/31-day-writing-challenge/) - A friend and fellow blogger's 30-day writing challenge inspired me to find a writing challenge of my own. I did some googling and came across A LOT of month-based challenges. Oy! But none spoke to me. So I pondered and pondered and came up with my own. Since October has 31 days, I'm going for
- [the table.](https://wordhabit.com/the-table/) - today was communion at my church. i love communion sabbaths, and i truly mean love. it's not so much about the location but the time purposefully set aside to remember the amazing love of Jesus and the way that remembering happens. Adventists typically have communion once a quarter (not every saturday) and we include foot
- [joy, the pure kind](https://wordhabit.com/joy-the-pure-kind/) - i almost didn't write about this and i find it strange that i didn't think to write about it much sooner. well, here's the deal. today we (my husband and i) got really good news. and no, we're not pregnant. today was my 2nd post-op appt since having the 4.5 inch and 10 inch fibroids
- [all together, once again...](https://wordhabit.com/all-together-once-again/) - sometimes...ok, who am i kidding...OFTENtimes it's really nice to sing together, to join in with hundreds of others who not only know the words and the notes but are singing from an experience with Jesus. last sunday we unintentionally visited the All Souls Church in London. our initial intention was to be audience members in a radio
- [presence](https://wordhabit.com/presence/) - it's time to write again. unfortunately, i allowed myself to get distracted by facebook and now i've forgotten how i was going to begin this post. it was smarter than this; i value smart starts. alas, writing is still in order so here i go, placing one figurative foot in front of the other. today
- [help/hope](https://wordhabit.com/helphope/) - (Written a couple of days ago.) In a little over a week, I get to preach a sermon about hope. If only I knew the specific direction I should go in. I spent an hour pouring over scripture and nothing gripped me. So either it's not yet time to write or I'm disconnected. Either way,
- [The Hope of Unfinished Business](https://wordhabit.com/the-hope-of-unfinished-business/) - Just want to encourage you today. You may not understand why various things happen--the sad, miserable, discouraging things that make hope simply a notion. I've had my share of that stuff. While I wish I possessed some magical wisdom for you, there are some realities I've come to believe and there's a promise I cling
- [finite](https://wordhabit.com/finite/) - I'm finite, I come to an end. These are lyrics from a Sara Groves song. They've been ringing in my head for a while now, reminding me of the need to desire eternity with God but not be so "heavenly minded that I'm of no earthly good," as my dad would say. I must be
- [the pieces](https://wordhabit.com/the-pieces/) - years ago, as in almost 20 years ago, i thought about becoming an architect. i didn't know it at the time, but i probably felt an affinity to such design work because i like details, i like lines, i like white space, i like projects...and probably some other things. that's not to say that that's
- [a song](https://wordhabit.com/a-song/) - i was asked to sing for a program. things went a little long and i wasn't able to sing after all. i wasn't disappointed...i'm not THAT much of a diva. :) i was actually a little relieved because i had planned to sing a cappella. the last time i sang a solo a cappella was
- [ready? nope.](https://wordhabit.com/ready-nope/) - i've been doing a fair amount of listening lately. i know this because there are these seemingly random thoughts that jump into my consciousness and after a little bit of where did you come from, where did you go i realize that they've come from other people. they are the frustrations and joys posted on facebook,
- [A little god's prayer](https://wordhabit.com/a-little-gods-prayer/)
- [mixed emotions](https://wordhabit.com/mixed-emotions/) - #1. I woke with regret. It's been a week since surgery. I'm doing quite well--pretty strong, beating fatigue. But I should have set up an auto response for email, trusted all of work to God. Instead, I'm not truly resting and it feels too late now. What pains me is not that I need the
- [we must work](https://wordhabit.com/we-must-work/) - and just to set the record straight, i'm not at all talking about earning salvation, works righteousness or any of the like. this isn't about that so i hope you don't read any of that into this. here goes... i've been off work for a day less than a week. why? because i had surgery,
- [feel to heal](https://wordhabit.com/feel-to-heal/) - though my body is tired, my mind is very much awake. listen here.
- [Pre](https://wordhabit.com/pre/) - There's nothing quite like what seems like an endless countdown. I should be asleep instead of thinking about the hours I have left before surgery. It's a normal procedure but it yielded a claustrophobic nightmare last night and spurts of anxiety tonight. Woe is me. 8 hours to go. I'll be so tired, I'll knock
- [slowing down](https://wordhabit.com/slowing-down/) - in a few weeks i'll have no choice. zero. zilch. no choice. i'll have to slow down because my uterus and surrounding area will have experienced a stressful time called myomectomy. it's a surgical procedure during which fibroids are removed. fibroids are typically, non-cancerous tumors that grow in a space that's got enough access to
- [When Faith Amazes](https://wordhabit.com/when-faith-amazes/) - When Faith Amazes (click that ^ link) I want to thank my Board for committing to journeying through ministry together and for trusting God last night. And I want to thank God for consistent reminders that he is present and ready to do things in and through us that will consistently amaze and consistently develop
- [a decision](https://wordhabit.com/a-decision/) - tonight, i was reflecting on commitment, on sticking with what we've been given. i've decided on this: to stick with being a pastor until God says something else. that's my resolve. now i'm sure drama will ensue and all my introverted perfectionistic ways will be challenged. and then i'll run away in my mind and
- [creative privilege](https://wordhabit.com/creative-privilege/) - it's tempting to think that it's arrogant to think of yourself as creative. but to do so is like thinking it's arrogant to think of yourself as sensitive. you know what you are. you know what you respond to. you know how you thrive. if anything, it'd be really arrogant for me to think i'm
- [i've come down](https://wordhabit.com/ive-come-down/) - perhaps you have, too. perhaps you've fallen victim to an invitation that was ever so enticing. your guard was already down. you weren't giving your full attention to what you've been called to do. or perhaps you've not even been settled on your calling. essentially you've been an easy person to distract, a perfect target.
- [Don't Come Down!](https://wordhabit.com/dont-come-down/) - I try to use exclamation marks sparingly. So listen up. I'm not sure when I first heard or read the Nehemiah 6 passage but I do remember being struck by it. Struck, not in a, "Yeah, that's right, Nehemiah, I'm doing a great thing, too!" kind of way but in a, "Wow. I want to
- [views](https://wordhabit.com/views/) - we took a little trip today, picnic basket in tow. first stop was the museum. second stop was the greenway (to eat lunch until the heavens opened). there were several other stops before heading back home. each one offered something different. each one added something to our day. each one had a particular view. a view
- [music](https://wordhabit.com/music-3/) - she is, for me, a strange friend. quite frankly, i don't know what to do with her. Justin and i had a really honest talk the other day about music. i realized just how a part of me she really is. i cried at the thought of losing her, of giving up on her. i also realized
- [willing](https://wordhabit.com/willing/) - There's an older lady at my church that I'm quite fond. Her love for The Lord is exciting. Perhaps you've met people like her. When they talk about their faith journey they look as if they're going to explode with joy. Her petite size makes that pending explosion all the more enjoyable to experience. She's
- [Space](https://wordhabit.com/space/) - Today I wrote a song. I sat long enough, after wearing out my arms in a new workout, to record some words to some tune that I don't even remember. And that's ok. Because I sat. Long enough. That's what matters most, even more than the song. I made space. When's the last time you
- [John 1:16-18](https://wordhabit.com/john-116-18/) - From his abundance we have all received one gracious blessing after another. For the law was given through Moses, but God’s unfailing love and faithfulness came through Jesus Christ. No one has ever seen God. But the unique One, who is himself God, is near to the Father’s heart. He has revealed God to us. ...one gracious blessing
- [5 Reasons Your Introverted Pastor Does NOT Hate You](https://wordhabit.com/5-reasons-your-introverted-pastor-does-not-hate-you/) - This post is adapted from this post. It's so freeing for me to read. I encourage you to read it too... Does your pastor seem to: - think more than talk - have no backbone regarding conflict - avoid you - only share personal information with a select few - prefer writing over talking -
- [to be known](https://wordhabit.com/to-be-known/) - today i talked with a few girlfriends on our monthly conference call. i shared how hard mother's day was, how i cried as mothers were asked to stand in church and children handed them flowers. i talked about the pain of not being a mother. one friend responded with, "You are a mother. Women who've
- [consolidation](https://wordhabit.com/consolidation/) - I just did something that's been years in the making and surely a step in the right and proper direction. I consolidated almost all of my blogs. Almost all because a couple need to stay separate. But the other four didn't need to be four. Yes, I've had 6 blogs. I'm winning in compartmentalization. Trust
- [definitions](https://wordhabit.com/definitions/) - i'm in a pretty lengthy process of redefining how i live my life. i say it's lengthy as a sort of precautionary measure. i want to give myself as much time as i need and i have no clue what that'll be so "lengthy" seems a good choice. the first step i've taken with regard
- [collide](https://wordhabit.com/collide/) - and i will try to fix you(quickly insert rich transition music) tears stream...yeah, it's quite the emotive song. i'd listen to it now were it not for the fact that i'd have to first search for it and secondly, essentially permit myself to bawl my eyes out. i want neither. and so i
- [Psalm 23](https://wordhabit.com/psalm-23/) - Do we believe?
- [A Letter](https://wordhabit.com/a-letter/) - At a periodic gathering that I'm part of, one of our latest activities was to write a letter to ourselves, stating what we'd like God to do in our lives. The facilitator for that activity, took our self-addressed envelopes, stamped them, and mailed them to us several days later. Mine came in the mail a
- [Psalm 23 (a personalized account)](https://wordhabit.com/psalm-23-a-personalized-account/) - You, Lord, are my ShepherdI will not lack anythingYou make it possible for me to lie down in green pasturesYou lead me (what grace!) beside still watersYou restore my soulYou lead me in paths of righteousness for the sake of Your nameEven when I walk through the valley of the shadow of death (and not
- [Now What?](https://wordhabit.com/now-what/) - So Sex Week ended yesterday...(I'm actually writing this on Friday so that I don't have to think about it tomorrow...not because sex is bad to think about on Saturday but because this practice of blogging every day of the week has been exhausting and that's not how I wish to spend Sabbath.) The other day
- [The Non-Sex Stuff that Affects Sex](https://wordhabit.com/the-non-sex-stuff-that-affects-sex/) - We often hear the question, "How far is too far?" and it's asked within the context of having sex. Well, there's another question that we should, perhaps, be a bit more concerned about. It goes like this: What's that stuff that isn't sex that will impact my decision to have sex and the actual act
- [WWPD--What Would Paul Do?](https://wordhabit.com/wwpd-what-would-paul-do/) - Today I'm definitely speaking specifically to people who use the term Christian to define their faith journey. I'm also clearly making (as I always do) a few assumptions about what that means based on what I've learned and believe about God. We can't get away from that. So if you find yourself responding with, "That's
- [Abstinence Isn't Enough](https://wordhabit.com/abstinence-isnt-enough/) - We've come to day 4. From comments like "keep your legs closed" to "keep yourself pure" to "this is a moral standard," I get a clear sense that we don't talk about abstinence in enough detail. The first comment suggests that you're able to simply shut off hormones, desires, thoughts... The second comment suggests that
- [Consequences Part 2](https://wordhabit.com/consequences-part-2/) - When I think of people I know who aren't experiencing sex (or intimacy of any kind) in a healthy, committed way, I see insecurity. It's sad, really. I want people to be secure in who they are and in who their with and I want that security to come from a really healthy space, one
- [Consequences Part 1](https://wordhabit.com/consequences-part-1/) - There are many. I'll just focus on a few. Remember, we're talking about the having of sex. Why focus on consequences? The hook-up culture, especially on college campuses, reveals our decreased focus on consequences, on long-term costs/benefits. In addition, we're more focused on "what's in it for me?" than "what's in it for us?" which goes
- [Yes, it matters. But of course!](https://wordhabit.com/yes-it-matters-but-of-course/) - I'm talking about sex...the having of it. It's not simply a topic, an expression, a choice. It's this deep, layered, and somewhat mystifying act even if you don't believe in God. And it's this way regardless of any other thing you can think of that creates an "us/them" sort of separation: class, race, gender, ethnicity,
- [sex...a 7-day series.](https://wordhabit.com/sex-a-7-day-series/) - It's time for another series. This one will span the next 7 days. Why? Because it's Sex Week* at University of Tennessee, Knoxville (UT) so how college students view and practice sex is on my mind in a particularly special way. Sex is deep. It's layered. It's somewhat mystifying. Let's take it seriously. And let's talk about it. Day 1: Yes,
- [the crying](https://wordhabit.com/the-crying/) - today's been a random tear festival. the only thing i can attribute it to is hormones, really. that in addition to how i should be 14 weeks pregnant, beyond nausea and full of excitement. i should have told the world by now about the baby inside me and my hidden pinterest board would be on
- [job description: part 1](https://wordhabit.com/job-description-part-1/) - roughly two months ago, i confessed to a group of colleagues that i used to think i was a good listener until i realized that i just didn't talk. my confession elicited major laughter. it surprised me. i wasn't trying to be funny and then i experienced the joy of being naturally funny. i tried not to
- [on being a savior](https://wordhabit.com/on-being-a-savior/) - The following posts are all dedicated to the students I've worked with through the years, from Lacombe, Alberta, to Knoxville, Tennessee and every other place in between. #1: spare an angel #2: eye of the tiger #3: if i could #4: doubting thomas #5: fix you job description: part 1
- [#5](https://wordhabit.com/5-2/) - I used to think I had to save you. It was the standard setup. You came to me with your stuff and I, the "all-knowing," would listen and advise. It's the stuff of movies and ministry fairytales. But you were already aware enough to know the answers and to tell me when my answers were
- [#4](https://wordhabit.com/4-2/) - I used to think I had to save you. And then we had an unexpected meeting. The hug, the joy that ensued reminded me that we're on equal footing. Yes, we occupy different roles and yes, our responsibilities to each other differ. Yet we walk together. If only I'd experienced more joy with you. We
- [#3](https://wordhabit.com/3-2/) - I used to think I had to save you. I made absolutely zero progress. I quit early on you. Wish I could remember how freeing that is each time I get back to this unhealthy space. But with you things were different. I'd already grown up a lot by the time you came along. By
- [#2](https://wordhabit.com/2-2/) - I used to think I had to save you. So when you walked into my office and invited me out for a late night coffee shop run, I became unsure of my place. I never knew exactly how to respond to your maturity and to your love. You had a much stronger hold on your
- [#1](https://wordhabit.com/1-2/) - I used to think I had to save you. Perhaps that began the morning your basketball coaches knocked on our classroom door, asking to speak with me. Was this normal? I didn't know quite how to respond. They were tall, the senior of which wore a dark velour sweatsuit. That afternoon I asked Tom for
- [D&C Prep](https://wordhabit.com/dc-prep/) - this is some shit. please don't excuse my language. please hear it. listen. deeply. this is my life right now, my very present reality. and i don't give a rat's ass if you judge me. you try responding to this question: "Can you tell me in a word of phrase what the doctor will be
- [i want to parent now more than ever](https://wordhabit.com/i-want-to-parent-now-more-than-ever/) - i know i'll cry a lot in the days ahead. and thankfully, i've learned that that's okay. crying is okay. loss is of the devil but crying is okay. and right now, about 12 hours after hearing we've lost our baby, i'm crying as i think about not being able to marry my baby off.
- [it's all gone](https://wordhabit.com/its-all-gone/) - it felt like hours. i didn't think we were getting an ultrasound today but when we got that news i was excited. it meant we got to hear our baby's heartbeat once again. the first time was incredible. it was a sort of confirmation that we're truly on this journey toward parenthood. the tech couldn't
- [8 weeks and counting](https://wordhabit.com/8-weeks-and-counting/) - Great. Just got an email telling me what my belly will look like after pregnancy. Well after poking it daily with anti-coagulant juice, I'm sure it'll be real pretty in its deflated form. More on the juice later... May 27, 2013 I never did get to write about the experience so I'll briefly detail
- [week 8](https://wordhabit.com/week-8/) - i'm proud to be pregnant. not in an anti-abortion kind of way but in a... dagnabit, if i can suffer nausea and bloating and weight gain all because something the size of a kidney bean is inside of me then i will gladly tuck in my shirt and showcase my belly (to me and my
- [week 7](https://wordhabit.com/week-7/) - nausea. if i could pay someone a year's wage to make it go away, i'd find that money somewhere. that almost reflects how much i hate my current state. it's so bad that if i haven't felt nauseous for a while and then just THINK about it, i get nauseous. i'm telling you...i couldn't dream
- [week 6](https://wordhabit.com/week-6/) - parasite now has limb buds that will grow into shoulders-arms-hands-fingers and thighs-legs-feet-toes. it's growing 1 millimeter ever day. i like the fact that its heartbeat can be heard. can't wait to hear it! that's so weird/cool/incredible. oh, and there's also an umbilical chord. the little leach is about to suck up all my goodness. well,
- [week 5](https://wordhabit.com/week-5/) - i'm pregnant. oh boy/girl! what strange parasite lingers softly? it has a brain and a spinal cord, both still developing, and a heart that's already formed. i don't care how much someone tells you about pregnancy in high school biology, nothing sounds so wonderful until it's about the tiny thing inside you. inside me. it's growing.
- [Lost](https://wordhabit.com/lost/) - It's how I feel. I feel compelled to talk to my friend's mom who just lost her husband and my own blood family and yet I don't know what I'd say and I feel as though I should know. After all, I'm a pastor, right? I have words. I'm supposed to have words. But really,
- [Dr. Warren, thank you...](https://wordhabit.com/dr-warren-thank-you/) - Yes, you wanted us to learn the importance of "The House on Mango Street" and the themes of Richard Wright but it mattered even more that we included a few sentences of appreciation to anyone who'd helped us complete our papers. Saying thank you to my friend in Lamson Hall Room 234 for letting me
- [topics i want to write about](https://wordhabit.com/topics-i-want-to-write-about/) - Paul...the apostle miracles religious expectations the swinging of hips how to be saviour following incompetence process value judgements Jesus: true or false atheism does Jesus find us or do we find him and is that mere semantics?
- [story](https://wordhabit.com/story/) - this semester at the advent house, we're journeying through our stories and the stories of Jesus. we're looking at our own and revealing several things about ourselves like our family histories, our interests, and our walk with Jesus (no matter how long or short, shallow or deep...). and then we're spending time with particular stories
- [family.](https://wordhabit.com/family/) - it's not often you get to watch a funeral at 4am on your laptop and it's not often that you want to. and when it's over, you're not sure if you should say you're glad you got to or that you're grateful. you certainly shouldn't say you loved every minute, not out loud anyway. well,
- [memory lane (letter to a student)](https://wordhabit.com/memory-lane-letter-to-a-student/) - my first teaching job taught me that i like to teach. my first teaching job taught me that i care deeply. my first teaching job yielded the following letter to a student. (what a difference a decade makes...i'd say all of this so much differently now.)
- [knitpicks and other unnecessary connections](https://wordhabit.com/knitpicks-and-other-unnecessary-connections/) - i need to let go. my inboxes are evidence of that...as is, perhaps, the reality that i have more than one inbox...3, in fact. i don't knit often. maybe once a year. and when i do, i don't use a pattern and i use yarn that i already have on hand (of which there's plenty).
- [A Million Miles: Day 1](https://wordhabit.com/a-million-miles-day-1/) - even though i'm reading through the book a second time, so much of it feels new. thanks Donald Miller for a writing style that jives with my head. five of us met today. before we got to the book, we spent a little time sharing stories of our own, moments in our times that we
- [A Million Miles](https://wordhabit.com/a-million-miles/) - this is like the after party, the space in which we write through later epiphanies or stuff we just didn't bother to bring up during our earlier discussion time. if your two cents are on another blog, send the link to your post and i'll throw it up here. if you'd like to simply email
- [Our Father Who Art Intentional [Sermon Link]](https://wordhabit.com/our-father-who-art-intentional-sermon-link/) - it's a different and perhaps "new to you" exploration of Genesis 1:1. be blessed and feel (very) free to send me a critique... listen here.
- [my rights vs your rights](https://wordhabit.com/my-rights-vs-your-rights/) - surely mine should win. after all, i'm (naturally) more concerned about myself than i am about you and i'm unfortunately quite independent and individualistic in my way of life. it's unfortunate because such levels of self weren't God's plan and God's plan is, ladies and gentlemen, a major part of the current brou ha ha
- [courage](https://wordhabit.com/courage/) - what story do i want to tell? every decision i make tells a story. i knew i needed to leave, so i left i knew i needed to stay, so i stayed i knew i needed to ask for help, so i asked for help i knew i needed to submit to the authorities even
- [life. death. life.](https://wordhabit.com/life-death-life/) - while coming to the end of a section about his uncle's death in Donald Miller's book, "A Million Miles...," i found myself sincerely wanting more. please. continue talking about death. what in the world? may be your swift reply. here's the deal. almost two years ago, i started losing ppl close to me. first a
- [post easter](https://wordhabit.com/post-easter/) - having not grown up with any easter traditions, no easter egg hunts or easter church dresses, i can't say that i have the same level of "fun" anticipation that i've seen in others when it comes to the day that just passed. and i don't readily remember big church celebrations either, no sunrise services or
- [brothers are suspicious](https://wordhabit.com/brothers-are-suspicious/) - click to read linked article i have one. and i've often worried about him. i haven't worried that he'll not be successful. no. i've often worried that someone would hurt him simply because he's a black male. now that he's 6'4'' and a chunk of lean muscle, you could say that i have nothing to
- [magical. peaceful. miserable.](https://wordhabit.com/magical-peaceful-miserable/) - these three words describe what's often experienced as i step into new scenarios. and for some of us, thinking politically is new. we know how to be political--as in being politically correct, talking to the "right" ppl, dressing the "right" way, etc--but we don't know how to engage the ideas of politicians without eventually feeling
- [what's hindering your service?](https://wordhabit.com/whats-hindering-your-service/) - on february 24, our main speaker for a conference couldn't make it for the first talk...plan delays. so i had to:#1. trust God#2. study the passage#3. believe in the word of God#4. speak with conviction and as only God can, God blessed. listen here... the teaching is based on Genesis 19:1-30. i haven't listened to
- [following](https://wordhabit.com/following/) - am i allowed to read? reading used to be the thing i did coz i liked it (or coz my parents hoped i'd one day like it). and then it became the thing i HAD to do in order to write a paper or feel smart in a discussion. and then it became the thing
- [the curse of should](https://wordhabit.com/the-curse-of-should/) - i've been thinking about how to best reflect on the new year of life i find myself in (as of last tuesday). i suppose that within this particular blogging context, it would be most appropriate to see how my life of campus ministering relates to my new found age but all i can come up
- [guts & worship](https://wordhabit.com/guts-worship/) - guilty. that's a fairly good word to describe the initial effects of the 1 project on my life. no, no one was pointing fingers at me but almost every talk had me on the verge of tears and somewhat defeatedly asking, "how am i supposed to make this better?" i experienced the seattle gathering through
- [temptations](https://wordhabit.com/temptations/) - Cinnamon Sugar Pull-Apart Bread, a photo by tlboyd05 on Flickr.
- [this week's "remedy"](https://wordhabit.com/this-weeks-remedy/) - i've been trying to make a habit of taking out a certain notebook at 1pm each friday and reflecting on the week. i call it "remedy" b/c that's the local coffee shop in which this idea first took shape. and the remedy of this cathartic process is it's ability to not necessarily fix anything that's
- [the good stuff](https://wordhabit.com/the-good-stuff/) - i'm trying to spend more time focussing on the the good stuff of ministry, the stuff that creates smiles, positive vibes, amens, hallelujahs...that sort of stuff (as opposed to the other stuff that's so much easier to focus on.) and this good stuff isn't about fantastic programming; it's about God showing me His love and
- [a love that compels](https://wordhabit.com/a-love-that-compels/) - all the frustrations I've ever faced don't seem to compare to the emotional pain I'm currently in as I think about my friend, now dead, and the hundreds of women she ministered to in the dorm that I must now face for the next five days. sadly, I know what it's like to have death
- [the ideal persona](https://wordhabit.com/the-ideal-persona/) - i sometimes wonder what it'd be like to be bubbly/sanguine...and how that would manifest in my work. but i'm not bubbly/sanguine so spending time in wonderland is of no use. i'm mellow/melancholy. i think deeply and critically and i don't always have a smile (and smiling, unfortunately, is how some ppl indicate happiness/approachability. the bubbly/sanguine
- [together](https://wordhabit.com/together/) - sometimes my students confirm my struggles, not because they're causing them but because they're experiencing them, too. more often than not, it's unexpected. our age, experience, cultural norms, and basic preferences are typically different. so i'm surprised to recognize their pain, their anxiety, their frustration...as my own. and no, this isn't the pain, anxiety and
- [Celebrate](https://wordhabit.com/celebrate/) - I'm supposed to take some time each Friday and celebrate my accomplishments, or should I say, the things that I've seen happen that I'm glad have happened this week. So here goes: I should first say that this is a hard exercise when I have a huge list I want to get through by 3pm...So
- [reflections](https://wordhabit.com/reflections/) - [everything in brackets can be skipped over for a more fluid reading experience.]it started out as a grand idea: I'll go to a retreat center for 24 hours!it became a simple and beautiful reality after not making the time to reserve a spot at a retreat center and achieving desperation the night before my scheduled retreat day.
- [we'll see...](https://wordhabit.com/well-see/) - I want to take time to hash out quality thoughts on the following related to my work... Personalities How they intersect with yours (teach you about yourself) How they clash with each other How they each want a piece of the space, of you How it's hard not become a personality-based space God How he
- [E](https://wordhabit.com/e/) - i can't sleep. it's a reoccurring problem of the last few months. i'll wake to appease my bladder then return to bed wide-eyed. and it's not that i actually feel wide-eyed but that's how my body acts as my mind awakens to the many things i should have said or need to say, should have done or
- ["get over yourself"...and other words of affirmation](https://wordhabit.com/get-over-yourself-and-other-words-of-affirmation/) - affirmation = the assertion that something exists or is true.and on that note, here we go... Today began with the question, "Why?" How about that for one's first conscious thought? Encouraging. A great preview to the day. And somehow I managed to get up, talk to God for a while, then head to the gym.
- [Pure Religion](https://wordhabit.com/pure-religion/) - sermon...
- [Love Wins?](https://wordhabit.com/love-wins/) - I've listened to the Love Wins audio book and I'll probably listen to it again and again as I sort through questions and get a better sense of what it is I believe the Bible says about heaven & hell. I currently know that I don't believe in the Jesus Rob Bell supports. And as
- [Stuff...](https://wordhabit.com/stuff/) - This Is the Stuff just popped into my head as I clicked "new post." Been up since 3 and moved from "I should be able to go back to sleep" to "it ain't happnin" as all the stuff that I have yet to complete at work flooded my brain and then my knee pain kicked in,
- [Rejection](https://wordhabit.com/rejection/) - Here's a terrible "freshman essay" first line for you: Rejection is something we're all afraid of. Oh really? You're kidding? Well I'll be! So seriously, it's true and I admit that it's true for me. I recently had an "ah ha!" moment that wasn't quite as Oprah-exciting as the moment sounds. I was thinking through
- [Being Silent](https://wordhabit.com/being-silent/) - I like to talk. Even in my introverted desire to be alone, I like to talk. I especially enjoy a healthy round of verbal tenis where you don't necessarily agree with your opponent's strategy or ability but you enjoy the topic and you're both emotionally strong enough to slug it out. Back and forth. Back
- [cycles](https://wordhabit.com/cycles/) - the world i live in is very cyclical, therefore, for me not to live cyclically is unconsciously frustrating. until now. God answers prayer. i've been in a bit of a funk, not particularly thrilled by anything except the act of completing something. if i can cross it off, i want to do it. if its
- [kindness](https://wordhabit.com/kindness-2/) - leads to repentance...to saying "i'm sorry," returning the favor, extending the welcome. it's so good yet its infrequent use seems to suggest that it's a hidden knowledge. perhaps there's something gnostic about it? (kidding!) it's probably one of my most frustrating desires. when received, i feel like gold. when desired, i feel like...like something far
- [Memory](https://wordhabit.com/memory/) - Matthew, I know you can't hear me but I guess part of me still grieves and all of me would love it if you'd walk through the door again. The last time I saw you was almost a year ago now. A Wednesday night. You told me to go home. I said see you tomorrow.
- [a sensory relief](https://wordhabit.com/a-sensory-relief/) - my tires are old--i must purchase new ones perhaps as soon as today. i can hear them, louder than ever and i can feel them. the signs are so clear that i don't even need to look at them. hearing and feeling are enough to make a costly purchase, an essential change. the clarity of
- [God-walks; God-wins](https://wordhabit.com/god-walks-god-wins/) - my work often has me thinking about self-worth: my own, that of my students, where we find it, how we feed it. and while i know that we should only find & feed it in Christ, i also know that Christ isn't always our first resort. we end up disappointed, frustrated, wondering why ppl affect
- [it's all coming together](https://wordhabit.com/its-all-coming-together/) - i'm hitting pause on the final details check. (this weekend is our annual CONNECT Conference.) you'd think i'd be frantic. i thought i'd be frantic but instead i'm shouting "yay God!" it's an internal shout...i'm typically only loud during competition or "no he didn't" sorts of conversations. it's also an internal shout because i'm tired,
- [commitment](https://wordhabit.com/commitment/) - a fellow campus chaplain and i were talking earlier today about how hard it is to get our students to commit to things (especially far in advance).* it's another challenge to add to the "what in the world" list. no worries, there is no actual list that we avidly monitor. the mere thought of starting
- [unexpected love](https://wordhabit.com/unexpected-love/) - so i bought some roses this morning, a last-minute decision, and encouraged students to hand them out on this love-celebration-day. by 5pm, there were still many roses left so i took some and decided to hand them out randomly to women on campus. it was priceless. encounter 1 (sitting on a bench) would you like a
- [how new phones help you grieve](https://wordhabit.com/how-new-phones-help-you-grieve/) - i'm not unique and i'm not exactly jumping over the moon. yay. 3 cheers. i have an iphone. and upon receipt of my latest gadget/upgrade, i proceeded to complete what i should have completed weeks ago...transfer all my contacts to my laptop. i didn't upgrade from one smart phone to another but from a rather
- [a sanctuary poem](https://wordhabit.com/a-sanctuary-poem/) - [set to Tenebrae: Second Movement performed by Kronos Quartet] Reminder number one: walk slowly. Steps matter Smoke rises to greet the sky afraid. Is it enough? I sat on the floor today Carpet circa 1995 Tough grey-brown, bland #11 Comfortless reliability stretched for meters around my exhausted frame Lean brown-skinned girl, twisted locks set ponytail-like
- [stuff i forget to write about](https://wordhabit.com/stuff-i-forget-to-write-about/) - i read a utmost devotional that messed my head up in a really great way the other day. i was particular struck by the words "Until others learn to draw on the life of the Lord Jesus directly, they will have to draw on His life through you. You must literally be their source of
- [what am i doing here?](https://wordhabit.com/what-am-i-doing-here/) - sometimes i doubt that i'm doing my job well. the skeptics, the know-it-alls, the stakeholders, their opinions and my own insecurities clutter my mind and i end up overwhelmed. frozen. unable to move on to the next best thing, i find myself in a familiar posture--sitting at my desk, head in hands, eyes leaking. but that's
- [sleepless nights](https://wordhabit.com/sleepless-nights/) - it's not the first time i've been unable to remain in that free state called sleep, the minutes and hours of peace that i often crave. no one gets on your real nerves when you're sleeping. no one rudely interrupts your true concentration when you're sleeping. you can change the way your dream is going,
- [i am a chaplain](https://wordhabit.com/i-am-a-chaplain/) - honestly, this just dawned on me the other day when i thought of what to name the url.* combining my occupation with my initials seemed a revolutionary thought. chaplain? me? what?! yet i prefer it to pastor. sorry. even minister is better than pastor. but let me not get too deep into crazy talk. that's
- [miracles](https://wordhabit.com/miracles/) - i often wake up in the morning, so unsure of how the day will flow. it's not that i have nothing to do. oh no. i never have nothing to do. it's that i'm unsure where to start. back in 2001, somewhere in the fall, i and many other a young woman attended a day-long
- [lessons learned](https://wordhabit.com/lessons-learned/) - live honestly always so that when necessary the truth can vindicate you whenever someone does something that hurts you, think about whether or not you've ever done the same ask the Holy Spirit to guide your day and even the next 2 seconds (when something foolish is about to explode from your lips) live according
- [Barnabas & Timothy](https://wordhabit.com/barnabas-timothy/) - Barnabas We find details about Barnabas' background spread throughout the book of Acts and Paul's epistles. Luke tells us that Barnabas was a Levite whose family came from the island of Cyprus where some of the Jews of the Diaspora had settled. He was a cousin of Mark, the writer of the gospel by that
- [help](https://wordhabit.com/help/) - it's a shared prayer. i prayed it this morning, posted in on FB, 4 ppl "liked it" and i just got off the phone with someone else who needed the same. help. _____________ dear Jesus, pls help us. and when You do, pls assure us that it's You so that there's zero doubt that You're
- [we've protected them from Jesus](https://wordhabit.com/weve-protected-them-from-jesus/) - suppose someone were to compare Jesus to a Snuggy. not cool, huh? well, unfortunately that's how we've portrayed him. more on that later...
- [morning glory](https://wordhabit.com/morning-glory/) - it's not yet 9am i'm wide awake thankful happy glad to know that stretched before me many hours to complicate it's not yet 9am i'm satisfied trusting hopeful glad to know that God has blessed me peace to share with those who cry
- [stank face](https://wordhabit.com/stank-face/) - sorry folks. when i don't like something, it shows. and it ain't cute. i'm one of those people who look best when smiling and i'm not a natural smiler. but boy oh boy can i give you a stank face. so this morning, when boarding my early morning flight, a flight attendant said in a
- [is this communion?](https://wordhabit.com/thoughts-on-communion/) - at the invitation of a friend, i had communion (outside of my denomination for the first time) this week. it was new. no foot washing. just bread and wine. i read the prayers. i ate. didn't dip (coz i don't do alcohol). i never like taking communion without first knowing about it ahead of time.
- [having to think](https://wordhabit.com/having-to-think/) - There once was a time when I just did ministry. Just did it. No deep queries into minds and patterns. No reading up on the experts' opinions. Just action. Pure action. So what changed? Those I serve are no longer peers in terms of expectation and experience. Expectations will kick you, kick you hard, all
- [lessons from email](https://wordhabit.com/lessons-from-email/) - Another online account. Another password. Another moment to decide whether or not to use the same 6-8 letters/symbols/numbers that my other 30 online accounts hold, even the Hotmail that I would delete if I were brave enough. I'm not even sure when I created that account. It's so last decade, before I learned that email
- [tears & love](https://wordhabit.com/tears-love/) - i have the best husband. (okay, yours may be great too...) yesterday was a rough one, one that brought to the surface a load of my frustrations and i overflowed. he was there. holding me. reassuring me. and then he said, "can i pray for you?" and this is love...
- [tears](https://wordhabit.com/tears-2/) - i have the best husband. (okay, yours may be great too...) yesterday was a rough one, one that brought to the surface a load of my frustrations and i overflowed. he was there. holding me. reassuring me. and then he said, "can i pray for you?" and this is love...
- [sunsets are good for your health](https://wordhabit.com/sunsets-are-good-for-your-health/) - very rarely do i leave work bright eyed and bushy tailed. today was no exception. and with so much time spent in my head (from just a few minutes after waking up), processing questions and frustrations, thinking through possibly needed rebuttals, and all other manner of madness that i've done for so much of my
- [Or are they?](https://wordhabit.com/or-are-they/) - Now I feel as if researching validity and worth is a quality and necessary endeavor. Yet I’d rather just come up with an answer: Yes, they are. No, they aren’t. Alas, they could be under different circumstances. Like if I were the woman at the well or Nicodemus, experiencing a private tête-à-tête with Jesus coz
- [No!](https://wordhabit.com/no/) - No? Is God mean? To say that He would say “no” sounds so harsh and lacks all the warm fuzziness we’ve often associated with divine Jesus love. To say that God would actually tell me that He won’t fix my eye, and to allow for the inference that there are some things God doesn’t fix
- [something beautiful](https://wordhabit.com/something-beautiful/) - i've come to really enjoy this song by need to breathe. and now, as i make my way to slumberville, i'm remembering the beauty i've recently experienced: girlfriend time a reminder that my man knows me well leaving work before it's pitch black outside inspiration God's unconditional love as evidenced by all of the above
- [i want to be angry](https://wordhabit.com/i-want-to-be-angry/) - and i am. there's a lot of crap in the world. there has been for a long time. just so happens that right now a lot of it's in my face and i don't want to deal with it. well, maybe parts but not all. folks, stop dying. thank you.
- [i don't care how you get here...just get here!](https://wordhabit.com/i-dont-care-how-you-get-here-just-get-here/) - frustrated by time ill spent, i finally opened up the Bible for my daily reading time. i'm at Matthew 20--parable of the vineyard workers. i've always only focused on the idea of fairness/unfairness regarding how the vineyard owner paid his workers. today i read it differently and i hope to always remember this reading. Jesus
- [the strength of focus](https://wordhabit.com/the-strength-of-focus/) - i'm quite amazed at how focused attention overrides chills and other flu symptoms. if i make up my mind to do something, i'm okay--not perfect, but okay. then i just chill and literally chill as fatigued muscles call out for rest. i will obey though still quite amazed.
- [yes!](https://wordhabit.com/yes/) - my fiance makes my day, every day. just thinking about him. or reading his post. or seeing his pic on my bookshelf, etc, etc, etc... he honestly makes my day. and yes, we sometimes get on each others nerves and yes, we'll probably have to unfortunate moments post the "i do's"; nevertheless, he'll still make
- [knowing - matt 7](https://wordhabit.com/knowing-matt-7/) - it's easy to toss around. "stop judging me!" "I like it when ppl don't judge me, when they just accept me for who i am." blah blah blah as a former co-worker said (loose paraphrase), "stop whining about ppl judging you. sometimes you're just wrong and that's that!" so here i am at 1:30 tuesday
- [belief](https://wordhabit.com/belief/) - i often begin thinking about work 5 minutes after i become fully conscious in the morning. it's a great reminder that i actually care about my job. on the other hand, it's often a reminder that i'm overwhelmed as my job's various realities crash into my personal need to simply adjust to my new life.
- [the day i stopped crying](https://wordhabit.com/the-day-i-stopped-crying/) - i'll have to start getting all my facts straight then write them down...be intentional about healing. who knew you could feel so deeply at 11? at that age, you're supposed to be fighting the drab effects of puberty not vowing to never return to a country that had become your home, your family, your life.
- [treasure](https://wordhabit.com/treasure/) - these days i read my Bible without the guilt of "thou shalt read your Bible" that i grew up nurturing and with the true desire to read b/c i know it's essential. i'm finally in Matthew, unable to complete a chapter each day b/c there's so much goodness in a section. take Matthew 6:19-24 for
- [together](https://wordhabit.com/together-2/) - there's something wonderful about orchestrating change on your own but something far more noble when the cause is driven by a collective...me and you and you and you and you... but how together can we really be? Karen Armstrong seeks to use the Golden Rule as a connecting point at which all religions can unite
- [pain changes you, it's true](https://wordhabit.com/pain-changes-you-its-true/) - when something rocks your world, so to speak, you never forget. some parts of you heal properly. nevertheless, various parts of you seem forever unsettled and you forever view the world through those unsettled parts. consequently, the pain you see in others is inevitably (though often unrelated) your pain on display...an interesting phenomenon. and if
- [more...](https://wordhabit.com/more/) - Last night I dreamed that I was at a beach with huge dunes that stood in stark contrast to a short beach area. Most people were at the shore, playing in the water. Two people I remember vividly were my younger brother and sister. Everything was fine and everyone was having a good time until
- [wonder (as opposed to wander)](https://wordhabit.com/wonder-as-opposed-to-wander/) - God. some say the name out of frustration. i say the name out of wonder. i'm anxious for something to be resolved and long before it's resolved i've received the peace that passes all understanding. God-peace. and i'm transported to wonder. how? why? and who am i? (psalm 8) God. i just want to say
- [the new way to take inches off your thighs](https://wordhabit.com/the-new-way-to-take-inches-off-your-thighs/) - just ride 115 kilometers with minimal rest stops. trust me. i'm pretty sure i lost inches. the scale says i only lost a couple of pounds but the mirror says, "you weren't this skinny before!" i'm just sayin...
- [why i ride](https://wordhabit.com/why-i-ride/) - it's not for the wind through my hair or the unexpected gravel through my gears. it's for the time alone, the outdoor perspective...the knowledge that i can. about 7 years ago i thought about buying a road bike. i was living in chicago and an add for the annual midnight ride caught my attention. a
- [i'm riding 88K next sunday...sponsor me!](https://wordhabit.com/im-riding-88k-next-sunday-sponsor-me/) - click here
- [the first line](https://wordhabit.com/the-first-line/) - during today's morning walk, my mind happened upon a line, a really good line, a line i wrote down once i got back home so that i can one day complete the story. i often wonder what would happen if i intentionally wrote each morning...
- [of lowes and limits](https://wordhabit.com/of-lowes-and-limits/) - so i'm truly a product of my mother--DIY makes me happy. today we went to Lowes desiring to find a new kitchen faucet, among other things. a kind man from hardware took us to our plumbing destination where the expert helped us locate our faucet of choice. a major deciding factor was the degree of
- [a portion sized thank you.](https://wordhabit.com/a-portion-sized-thank-you/) - i live in what at first sight (my sight) seems like a small town...it just has that flavour. a lot of small businesses, little this, little that. yeah, there's a walmart and other major stores but it still has that small feel to it. when a friend and i decided to go out to eat,
- [hair](https://wordhabit.com/hair/) - it's funny. it's real. it's unfortunate. etc. watch the trailer. http://www.facebook.com/ChrisRock i typically wear my hair in twists. i'm scared of weaves. i picture myself walking under a tree while a great gust of wind permanently connects my weave to a strong branch. but that melodrama aside, i just don't believe in the fake
- [random unfinished writings](https://wordhabit.com/random-unfinished-writings/) - Proximity 8/20/07 There’s this phenomenon going on. It’s called Proximity. The idea is to be as close to your audience as possible without being hurt—vulnerability without full-fledged reciprocity. It happens when the pilot gets out of the cock pit to tell us that his co-pilot isn’t yet here. Mr. Pilot could have stayed in his
- [about our Father's business](https://wordhabit.com/about-our-fathers-business/) - basic concept:a quarterly, print-ready, pdf. file with 300-350 word interviews or 1st person narratives about the life of ministry purpose:to encourage Adventists that don't hold traditional ministry positions (pastor, chaplain, etc) to be about our Father's business...to be connected to God personally and communally in ways that intentionally seek to build God's kingdom more...:10 people
- [how about a christmas in july gift for moi?](https://wordhabit.com/how-about-a-christmas-in-july-gift-for-moi/) - The space saving bicycle Posted using ShareThis
- [update on the philadelphia pool problem...](https://wordhabit.com/update-on-the-philadelphia-pool-problem/) - Embedded video from CNN Video one really sad fact about all this is that even if the club leadership isn't racist, the members who said those racist things when the children got there have made it that much harder to even think about smoothing anything over. oh human nature. when will you end?
- [last w & t](https://wordhabit.com/last-w-t/) - in my parent's laundry room sits a grey metal filing cabinet. i'm quite sure it's the only "michaela possession" still taking up space in this house and i'm quite proud that with all my hording ways, my stuff isn't the bane of my parent's existence. yet, i've known for a while that all the paper
- [dix ans](https://wordhabit.com/dix-ans/) - i met a 10-year old girl...a beautiful p.k. with a lot to discuss. it was great. our initial interactions were distant. she was the youngest at the dinner table, separated by a minimum of 12 years to the next youngest. so i wasn't surprised by her quiet nature but i could tell she had a
- [keep hope alive...?...](https://wordhabit.com/keep-hope-alive/)
- [my bike's name is...](https://wordhabit.com/my-bikes-name-is/) - off and on, i've thought about naming my bike. it's a random thought that i finally decided to entertain for longer than a moment. then other questions popped up. do bikes have a gender? does the fact that it was built for a woman mean it should have a woman's name? should i pick a
- [in just a few words](https://wordhabit.com/in-just-a-few-words/) - i'm determined to speak briefly, say enough and no more. i have a bad habit of rambling on and on and on... and it's not b/c i'm a woman. i think it's a matter of finding my voice late and finding authority in my voice even later. so i've got a lot to catch up
- [focus](https://wordhabit.com/focus/) - it's so easy to lose. there's so much going on in everyone else's life and keeping up with everyone else can help us forget to focus. need confirmation? just log onto* facebook or twitter or own a cell phone (or do all three). everyone's up to something. unfortunately, so much of the story we're telling
- [unforgettable.](https://wordhabit.com/unforgettable/) - hours after a ride, I’ve just about forgotten about it. I feel it, though. my shoulders struggle to stay properly postured and my thighs are experiencing that jello sensation while my knees wish I’d do some weight training and my back needs to lie down. so I guess I haven’t fully forgotten but ask me
- [here's why](https://wordhabit.com/heres-why/) - the other night i had a wicked-good brainstorm but i was much too lazy-tired to write it down. it had to do with the whole garbage-in, garbage-out concept. here's what i'm sayin (i just wish it was half as brilliant as what raced through my mind that midnight): most of us have somehow or another
- [the better way...](https://wordhabit.com/the-better-way/) - forget writing. i need a fancy voice recorder, the tiny kind that slips into your hand and is barely visible at your mouth. the kind that makes onlookers think you're FBI.
- [the road](https://wordhabit.com/the-road/) - gear: trek 7.3fx acquired: 2007 miles travelled: 70miles (give or take 20) enjoyment: priceless okay, enough for corny.... so i've been riding these last 3 days and it is kicking my butt! not literally, of course but the figurative had me asleep for a good 2 hours this afternoon. nap, glorious nap! and while i'm
- [scented memory](https://wordhabit.com/scented-memory/) - "A sentimental journey in every Cherry-Almond scented drop..." so the description reads but that's not why I bought it. It was on sale, cheaper than my preferred brands and richer than the cheapest brand. After taking a whiff, I knew that somewhere in my history, I'd used it with no negative memory attached. So I
- [kindness](https://wordhabit.com/kindness/) - i won't say names and i'll keep it short coz it's late and i can't afford to chance stupid sentences. you see, unkind protest frustrates me. i realize that some things must be railed against but whatever happened to peaceful protest and fruits of the spirit? and whatever happened to getting word from the horse's
- [letting go of God?](https://wordhabit.com/letting-go-of-god/) - (caution: it's best to read ALL the way through, ponder, then comment. thank you.) oh NPR... ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh NPR... in the midst of it's fund drive and my personal desire to not sleep (even though i should) i listened to an encore presentation of Terry Gross interviewing Julia Sweeney. Sweeney talked about her journey from Catholicism
- [soggy cereal](https://wordhabit.com/soggy-cereal/) - i'm about to eat some soggy cereal. why? coz it's across the room and i haven't wanted to move to pick it up and bring it over here. so it's been sitting...flakes in soy...getting soggy. i'm looking for the lesson, the deep truth bound up in my present lazy being... suggestions anyone?
- [beauty](https://wordhabit.com/beauty/) - Reminder number one: walk slowly. Steps matter Smoke rises to greet the sky afraid. Is it enough? I sat on the floor today Carpet circa 1995 Tough grey-brown, bland #11 Comfortless reliability stretched for meters around my exhausted frame Lean brown-skinned girl, twisted locks set ponytail-like Legs crossed. Elbows propping head in hands What now?
- [Chapel-Goers and Mongolian Grill](https://wordhabit.com/chapel-goers-and-mongolian-grill/) - “Did you go to Chapel today?” one friend asked another. “I didn’t have to—I’ve reached the max,” she replied, relieved at her success and the even more satisfying-sounding fact that she’s one worship moment away from the dorm requirement. And she’s not alone. A slew of us can relate to the sigh of relief that
- [thank you Clarence Page](https://wordhabit.com/thank-you-clarence-page/) - just in case you needed some clarity, THIS may help. perhaps i'll add my two cents another time when i have time. right now i'm too busy being black...hehe...sorry, my tongue's in my cheek. i promise.
- [dollars](https://wordhabit.com/dollars/) - i'm trying to do better with money. save more intentionally. tithe regularly (instead of lump sums after forgetting). spend thriftily. do the cash-only thing for groceries. etc. and wouldn't you know it...as the days and weeks pass by i make silly money mistakes. case in point: in december, i set up my january rent payment
- [give](https://wordhabit.com/give/) - i'm not good at it. i've said it before (perhaps just to myself) and i'll say it again (now to the WORLD). but. i've resolved to be better at developing and maintaining relationships. i know how to walk away. it's one of the side effects of a childhood on 3 continents. but i can't keep
- [yup](https://wordhabit.com/yup/) - it's official. i have creative energy that needs to be used intentionally...just in case you were wondering...
- [sugar](https://wordhabit.com/sugar/) - i've had sweet oranges, i have. but yesterday i had one that was beyond sweet. i literally needed water to wash the sugar out of my mouth. what's the deal? since when did they pump sugar into oranges? okay, i know they don't but that sucker was unbelievably sweet and made me believe that they
- [allinone medical attention, canada style (but better!)](https://wordhabit.com/allinone-medical-attention-canada-style-but-better/) - does everyone have random yet consist aches and pains? in other words, you've felt this way before but you don't know under what exact circumstances which is why it seems random.... that's my life. so i'd like to be able to get allinone medical attention at the drop of a hat. and allinone means every
- [talking with God](https://wordhabit.com/talking-with-god/) - semantics get the best of us and sometimes make the worst of us... ...yet i'm trying something new. instead of saying that i'm "praying" i'm going to start saying (at least to myself) that i'm "talking with God" and as i carefully critique my word choice, i'm going to see what difference it makes. after
- [...](https://wordhabit.com/196-2/) - sometimes i don't want to sleep. there's so much i want to do and if i sleep, i might forget...
- [what we don't know](https://wordhabit.com/what-we-dont-know/) - as i walked out of an office today with information i should have known but was never told, i realized the truth of Hosea...what we don't know will kill us, or more precisely "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge." i realize that the verse speaks specifically to lack of knowledge about God but
- [what do you do?](https://wordhabit.com/what-do-you-do/) - you've fallen asleep for a nap you wake up seeing what looks like daybreak you check the clock only because your cellphone beeps you wonder who in the world called you during the night you see the time 1:04am what? so now i'm watching the olympics but i should stop. i actually do have homework
- [linksys--thank you](https://wordhabit.com/linksys-thank-you/) - i was just on the phone with a nice gentleman from the philippines. he spent the last 30+ minutes trying to get my wireless to work. it's 5:30am in his world, 5:30pm in mine. i'm almost exhausted from clicking this and plugging in that, reloading this, shutting down that... and now i'm truly wireless and
- [music lives right around the sun](https://wordhabit.com/music-lives-right-around-the-sun/) - in that space untouchable to human hands so far removed that even our greatest disgraces can't mess it up forever because what God has created will still speak of him somehow somehow *** and to that end, i sing. i find others who love life, love music, love God, and we sing together. the effects
- [production.vacation.illusion](https://wordhabit.com/production-vacation-illusion/) - vacation...come soon but not too soon coz i've got loads to do first, okay? don't rush yourself. take it easy. rest up. sit pretty. we'll meet soon enough. just hope i'm really free to enjoy your company. oh vacation. thanks for coming soon.
- [100%](https://wordhabit.com/100-2/) - from the back to the middle and around again i'm gonna love you till the end one hundred percent pure love please don't ask me why i know the lyrics (or perhaps the wrong lyrics), just read on. last night i got my biweekly email stating that my pay check has been deposited into my
- [brought to you by the letter "r"](https://wordhabit.com/brought-to-you-by-the-letter-r/) - i sat down in an authentically ____________ restaurant and curiously reviewed the menu, truly uncertain of what i'd order because my exposure to this cuisine is limited. as my eyes glossed over the pages, the english major in me kicked into full force as i searched for something i'd connect with. and finally, there it
- [dreams](https://wordhabit.com/dreams/) - last night i had a crazy dream that makes me think i have a boundary issue, a problem helping others recognize my personal space... perhaps the dream will continue. perhaps i'll learn more. and, as always, there's a good chance that my crazy dream was the result of a particular food combination or something of
- [in french](https://wordhabit.com/in-french/) - i had a dream last night. don't remember all its details but i do remember that i was speaking comfortably in french. it was smooth. seamless. quality french. i should move to quebec.
- [A (7)](https://wordhabit.com/a-7/) - Thanks Simon
- [funny how](https://wordhabit.com/funny-how/) - i write private things in public spaces hoping the message will get across. like saying i miss you, making promises and who knows what else. but i really shouldn't live in the world of "read my mind" or "read my blog" when i can speak. i do possess all that's necessary to produce sound and articulate. but
- [surprise](https://wordhabit.com/surprise/) - it's sort of like getting embarrassed...it hardly ever happens but when it does it's a good one. a couple days ago Justin walked through the door with these--no occasion, no wrong done, just a gift that reminds me that he's so good for me and that this is good...
- [quick sick](https://wordhabit.com/quick-sick/) - no warning...usually i get warning. aches sore throat coughs sneezes but this one was quick. i just wish it would leave as it came.
- [thanks joni](https://wordhabit.com/thanks-joni/) - [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKQSlH-LLTQ&hl=en]
- [thanks man?](https://wordhabit.com/thanks-man/) - as i sauntered home, critiquing the song just sung and remembering my desire to keep raising the bar for myself, i started talking to God and the words "thanks man" came to mind.but just as quickly came the thought, "what?! God's not one of my boys!" my justin blogged the other day (or week, or
- [...](https://wordhabit.com/234-2/) - this could be funny... my boyfriend picked me up from class lovely we drove to the grocery store and bought Edy's 100% fruit bars yummy i began to eat a lime fruit bar... ouch! ouch? yes! somehow as my taste buds began to dance with enjoyment, this wonderful lime flavoured desert cut my lip. cut
- [after this](https://wordhabit.com/after-this/) - i'm in the midst of a class that's forcing me to wonder about my place in the worship-music world. i want to do music. i want to worship. but i don't want to do worship music all the time. it's not because i don't enjoy worship. it's just hard for me to know how i
- [what we say](https://wordhabit.com/what-we-say/) - impressed. i feel impressed to say... believe. i believe that you are... think. i think that you should... (insert excrement from the body of a huge cud-chewing male mammal) who told us that we have to always know what to say? how dare we believe it? yes, sometimes SOMETIMES we have the right words at
- [gerny](https://wordhabit.com/gerny/) - i just spelled journey that way. yes. i did it. as i excitedly typed away at my exegesis paper, i spelled g-e-r-n-y as the voice in my head said journey. yes. yes, i did it. yes, yes, i can make mistakes. yes i can
- [history belongs](https://wordhabit.com/history-belongs/) - to those who pray. that's the lyric and it sort of scares me. there's something to be said for owning the past and for owning it because you prayed and believed and God answered in agreement with your prayer. if i only believed. i used to avoid cooking as if it were a leprosy conduit.
- [...i messed up](https://wordhabit.com/i-messed-up/) - it has been a couple months since my resolve: to tell people that i'm not sure what i'm doing post MDiv, that i don't know where God's leading, but i know it's something beyond what i can imagine. well, just yesterday i forgot that resolve. let's be real. when a potential future employer says "so
- [get aware](https://wordhabit.com/get-aware/) - i don't know all the details but i'm much more aware this time around. but still glad i can't vote. oh the pressure! i can hardly juggle school let alone voting responsibilities. but for those of you who can vote, please do! and please make educated decisions. ladies, don't vote for the best looking. and
- [in the beginning...](https://wordhabit.com/in-the-beginning/) - there weren't a lot of words that i'm aware of. then again, my only proof sits in the words of the B-I-B-L-E (which is, indeed, the book for me and all of you. but that's another topic for another post).* Genesis 1:1 says that God spoke and things came into existence, "let there be light,
- [READ THIS FIRST!*](https://wordhabit.com/read-this-first/) - i begin this new blog in honor of all those i've taught. thank you for teaching me. with each class i recognized my limitations and God's willingness to work with me regardless. each student challenged my wisdom, skill, assumed knowledge and encouraged me to step up my game...it was good. but all that positivity aside,
- [beyond](https://wordhabit.com/beyond/) - so i just decided, as i watch restaurant makover on HGTV, that when it comes to my post seminary life i've got to think far outside the box coz that's what God's doing...that's what he's been doing all along, creating one of those huge puzzles that you never take apart. you glue, frame, and mount
- [weddings.beginnings.endings.](https://wordhabit.com/weddings-beginnings-endings/) - they're minutia in the grand scheme of marriage. i attended such minutia today and both my mother and another mother were telling me to elope. however, they quickly added that they didn't really mean it coz they want to experience all the madness. weddings symbolize the beginning of an end. and end to singlehood, an
- [blessed](https://wordhabit.com/blessed/) - it has been a tremendously busy 4 months of school, work, activity...life. i'm entering the new year with lessons learned and battles still to fight and i'm not afraid. that sounds horribly rehearsed. sorry. i'll do more reading, expand my expression bank. and while i'm at it, i'll also try to figure out the relationship
- [it's good](https://wordhabit.com/its-good/) - merry christmas!
- [sleep.cwm.thankful](https://wordhabit.com/sleep-cwm-thankful/) - i just want to stay up, do stuff, clean, sort. all of last week was non-stop and now i don't know what to do with my time. it's december 25 now. i should be fast asleep. the trip was great. i miss the sun. that's really all i have the energy to say right now.
- [gifts](https://wordhabit.com/gifts/) - so i'm not the best at buying gifts but this year i thought i did well...until i found out that just a few days ago, while i was away, he bought what i was waiting to put a bow on. next time we'll have to make lists. ...what's that lyric again? you live, you learn!
- [on the water](https://wordhabit.com/on-the-water/) - i'm about to get on a big ship to do mission work...yet...the main thing on my mind right now is all what i'll miss such as the free wireless connection that enables me to see the face of the man who makes me smile for days on end. yes. it's official. i'm cheesy, mushy, blah
- [a case...](https://wordhabit.com/a-case/) - at last. thank you...for waiting...
- [swift change](https://wordhabit.com/swift-change/) - burnout destroys creativity, faith, and a multitude of other things. the worst is when burnout is caused by all the "good" things like ministry, service, a good work ethic, etc... goodness in moderation...i have to find a proper balance. i can't return to where i was these last few days. i'm just thankful for the
- [yellow](https://wordhabit.com/yellow/) - Bible Originally uploaded by Complicated Philosophy not wanting to be anything else and too blind to see that i could be anything else, i said that i was green. green is the colour of certainty. green says that i want to follow God completely and that i'm doing what i can to spread the Word.
- [t dot](https://wordhabit.com/t-dot/) - so i ventured out of suburbia for the afternoon with my friend L. we rode the 'burb train to the big city train then walked into apple-land...where we experienced bad customer service....and then good customer service...but the bad memory remains... though frustrated, we refused to allow apple-land to change our minds about our apple products.
- [5-step plan...suggestions anyone?](https://wordhabit.com/5-step-plan-suggestions-anyone/) - i'm trying to plan ahead better. today, i realized another part of my time problem: as much as i like paying attention to detail, i don't like to process the finer details necessary for executing my own stuff unless i really, really, really want to do something and it's easy. and i'm seldom THAT interested.
- [miss](https://wordhabit.com/miss/) - to miss is to fail to do a variety of things such as: touch catch notice attend to have a meeting include reach experience i don't want fail but i keep on missing even when you're present
- [i shouldn't be on here but](https://wordhabit.com/i-shouldnt-be-on-here-but/) - i just want to say that i'm happy. okay. good night.
- [sunshine](https://wordhabit.com/sunshine/) - on a cloudy day. loads of it. amen. thank You God!
- [consistency](https://wordhabit.com/consistency/) - the quick flip of emotions, like factory line pancakes, take me from a calm "ah, the breeze is so lovely" to an irritated "why are you talking right now?" a classmate said she loves my personality--i'm so nice. i told her she must not know me well. of course, i don't totally mean that. but
- [late night](https://wordhabit.com/late-night/) - it was 10:30pm and i was ready to call it quits, throw in the towel, cliche, cliche, cliche... then, as i braided my hair and read over "indirect aggression," i got inspired. and now it's 11:24 and i have a better sense of how i'm going to teach tomorrow, a sense i'm grateful for. what
- [metabolic frolic](https://wordhabit.com/metabolic-frolic/) - it's the name of a tea. ...that's all i wanted to say...well, not really. it's all i have time for. now to run my panera bread company food off. =wordhabit=
- [saying goodbye](https://wordhabit.com/saying-goodbye/) - i've said goodbye a lot in life--to people, to places, to things...even inanimate things like fear. but that kind of farewell so often needs repeating. (i know i've already had this "conversation"...this repetition simply shows how much this is on my mind as of late) there are 3 things i love: music, teaching, writing...not always
- [i promise](https://wordhabit.com/i-promise/) - i promise not to be perfect i promise not to always make you smile i promise to have you all confused but hopefully not all of the time coz i promise to try to be helpful and i promise to try to be kind and i promise that even when you're a bit salty i'll
- [freedom to move](https://wordhabit.com/freedom-to-move/) - Originally uploaded by Vaughan this is music
- [i don't want to be that person](https://wordhabit.com/i-dont-want-to-be-that-person/) - who lets anger controlwho jumps to unnecessary conclusionswho has no patiencewho says "that's just the way i am"who creates a domino effect of latenesswho, due to his/her lack of planning, disrupts another's schedulewho doesn't listen with more than earswho's so afraid to be wrongwho's so afraid of not being in chargewho can't accept "thank yous"who's
- [strumming](https://wordhabit.com/strumming/) - my pain with his fingers singing my life with his words killing me softly with his song telling my whole life with his words no wonder it's such a great song...it comes from poetry. good words = good lyrics = great music = fantastically fun performance = fun was had by all = what i
- [the difference](https://wordhabit.com/the-difference/) - i sing from time to time. the difference between an enjoyable music experience and a regrettable music experience is intentionality. today i was intentional and i enjoyed it. i teach 3 days a week. the difference between an energizing session and a boring session is intentionality. today i bored myself. i do homework just about
- [good yet bad](https://wordhabit.com/good-yet-bad/) - http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/loonie bad only because it means my american money doesn't stretch as far but good because my canadian money is making waves... ...i don't like money sometimes. *sigh* but when i wiggle my toes in my new brown comfort vessels, i smile, yes i smile.
- [following.directions.](https://wordhabit.com/following-directions/) - if i only did it more often, i'd have good food more often. amen! coconut milk rice vinegar red pepper flakes soy sauce sweet onion garlic green onion life is good!
- [running](https://wordhabit.com/running/) - so i got new running shoes...they aren't exactly what i want but they'll do for the next couple of months as i get back into the swing of things, the run of things, the pace of things, the pain in my weaker knee, the sore back and tummy muscles, the need to stretch more than
- [sauce](https://wordhabit.com/sauce/) - i experienced some fabulous sauces a a Thai restaurant the other day and consequently promised myself to do more sauce experimentation. so this past weekend i cooked a Thai Chicken dish using Fri Chik (good 'ole vege meat). i made up a marinade based on the recipe's ingredients and had the Chik soak in it
- [uncle james](https://wordhabit.com/uncle-james/) - A (26) Originally uploaded by Complicated Philosophy my uncle james used to do modern dance. i never got to see him in action. that's a great sweater he's wearing. he lives in austria. i should pay him and his family a visit. my little sis has those same cheeks...as does my mum (i think). ah,
- [love.music](https://wordhabit.com/love-music/) - there's something great yet awful about beautiful music: it energizes, encourages and then makes you stay up a little later so you can write about it. trust me...it's making me do this! i will lack sleep tomorrow because of music. it's NOT my fault. i am NOT in control of this. haha i'll always enjoy
- [leaving](https://wordhabit.com/leaving/) - http://www.boundlessline.org/2007/09/young-adults-le.html there's truth here...but what do i do with my peers? helping teens is necessary, yes. but how do i reach out to those who've already disengaged? that's part of my calling isn't it?
- [mirrors](https://wordhabit.com/mirrors/) - they come in all sorts of forms: plastic, glass, round, square, wall size, clutch purse size...and sometimes they're people. it's not that they look like you. it's that their behaviour helps you see yourself. in that moment you have choices. do i accept what i've seen? do i reject it? do i take necessary steps
- [okay](https://wordhabit.com/okay/) - so to say my jazz singing days are numbered is slightly over-the-top. what i should say is that i have to put other stuff first. what i sing most, what people hear from my lips most, should be songs that speak directly to who Christ is , what he's done, how wonderful it is to
- [subconscious consciousness](https://wordhabit.com/subconscious-consciousness/) - you know how it is when a thought comes to mind, you ponder it momentarily then let it rest in your subconscious, then it resurfaces hours later to find you better aware after having subconsciously unpacked its truth? well, this is my reality. i'm minutes from a solid night of sleep yet i'm fully processing
- [real simple](https://wordhabit.com/real-simple/) - my favourite magazine. i bought the latest issue over a week ago. i've flipped through it very, very briefly. that's how busy i've been, preoccupied with things that matter more than easy recipes and essential classic wardrobe items (though i think highly of those things). and now i'm reading "forgiving our parents forgiving our selves,"
- [divided](https://wordhabit.com/divided/) - one of the big things in my life i'm trying to change is my divided self. i'm used to being one way in this corner and another way in that corner as i living among different circles and work in varied settings. it's just my way of being me. but it has become a nuisance.
- [san fran, shakes, and music](https://wordhabit.com/san-fran-shakes-and-music/) - it's been real fun but this chick is knackered! (those were my words last night and i didn't get a chance to post them. i ended up going to bed really late in order to overcome my jet lag. these folks are 3 hours behind my regular zone. i slept till 5am and went back
- [Order My Steps](https://wordhabit.com/order-my-steps/) - That’s basically how my morning prayer concluded. And I’ve had an interesting day filled with what I know to be God-ordered steps. I mean, what are the chances that I’d be alert enough at work to accomplish so many necessary things, tying up lose ends to ensure smooth future events? And how could I possibly
- [wanting to feel](https://wordhabit.com/wanting-to-feel/) - i should never post at 12:30am since thoughts aren't straight at this hour but anyway... if there were an "emotion" pill, i'd probably try to get a periodic dose. it's not that i want to be able to cry more easily--not at all--it's just that i think i'm too distant. death happens and i put
- [as if it isn't official....](https://wordhabit.com/as-if-it-isnt-official/) - death is a sick, sick thing two people i knew are dead within the span of 2 weeks...were we close? no. but that's not the point. the point is that their husbands, children, siblings, parents, etc., now wake up without them. today's funeral was for a 30 yr old woman. ...30. tomorrow's funeral will be
- [fortune cookies](https://wordhabit.com/fortune-cookies/) - "You will spend old age in comfort and material wealth" on one hand i feel pretty okay with this fortune. but on my foot i feel the pain of responsibility from the weight of the shackles that bind me to... money while i really like the idea of comfort i get uneasy with "material wealth."
- [it's hot](https://wordhabit.com/its-hot/) - but i'm so glad i slept okay and woke early enough to blade before the onslaught of humidity welcomed the day. today i'll finish a book i'm reading...hopefully...reading is a sure way for me to fall asleep. having trouble sleeping? read. want to forget about the troubles of this world via slumber? read. anxiety sustaining
- [the way i was raised](https://wordhabit.com/the-way-i-was-raised/) - women did everything...that's why i'm so seemingly independent. the toilet overflows--i know how to plunge, turn off water, use a mop if need be, etc. a mouse enters--i shriek momentarily, i clear away all paper from the floor, i look for drops, etc grass grows--i get out the mower, check gas levels, fill if need
- [death too soon](https://wordhabit.com/death-too-soon/) - so yes, we're at the age when more family dies...but mothers? a friend's mum died last night. she was a beautiful woman... i can't imagine what he's feeling right now, what he's thinking. ...
- [preparation](https://wordhabit.com/preparation/) - i'm forever buckling up my shoes...always preparing for something, dreaming up something big, hoping it'll happen yet too scared to work hard enough...afraid i'll fail. so i'm forever buckling and seldom standing tall, walking confidently, head high, shoulders straight. i'm seated on that chair, couch, stool, bed, floor, making sure my shoes are secure. do
- [1 word](https://wordhabit.com/1-word/) - as i sat on the extraordinarily huge beanbag watching a movie, my friend's cat hopped up and curled right into my side space. her presence made me think of the word "nurture." for those who've seen me with cats, they know i'm not all googoo gaga over the little attitudy animals but i'll allow them
- [the message](https://wordhabit.com/the-message/) - you need to restart your computer. hold down the power button for several seconds or press the restart button. that's the death message. i've had it 3 times now. i'm a bit afraid. but the message isn't supposed to create fear. it's supposed to simply heighten awareness. there's no system failure but failure to connect
- [from excitement to fear](https://wordhabit.com/from-excitement-to-fear/) - fear...there's something to it...something useful. it's not that God can't use us when we're not fearful but fear humbles in a way that useful. so now i'm useful...coz let me tell ya, i'm afraid! afraid of saying foolishness afraid of disgracing God afraid that... but why? okay...so the "useful" thing only goes so far. once
- [sermon...](https://wordhabit.com/sermon/) - i'm supposed to think about journeys. so instead of going to walmart with friends i'm going to ponder what a journey is both in dictionaries and in life (for the two aren't always mirror images) and i'm going to use this space to do so. of all the spaces i enjoy, this virtual world is
- [sermon](https://wordhabit.com/sermon-2/) - prep is good. eye opening. lovely. i sat by the track and observed 3 journeys in progress. it was quite fascinating to see how differently life plays out based on our varying needs: the barely 2 feet tall toddler is a soccer start in training. his dad must be patient and kick that ball around
- [bad words that come out of your mouth](https://wordhabit.com/bad-words-that-come-out-of-your-mouth/) - it just shouldn't happen. it's unfortunate. but sometimes we really don't have more to say or we haven't had time to plan our attack. it's true...i've said some dumb things in my day. guess i feel okay about it coz i don't have a huge platform, i don't ever stand before thousands of people and
- [music](https://wordhabit.com/music/) - makes me music breaks me it's who i am and who i never want to be yet lives inside of me what's your music? **** wrote that poem years ago...a decade at least. there's more to it. that part is what i remember most vividly. the words flow across my mind (why do we talk
- [crisp](https://wordhabit.com/crisp/) - i was looking at a friend's facebook pics and there they were, several beautiful women posing in what looked like a crisp alberta air. i miss that crisp cold, the kind where you can make do with a sweater though you know you should really add a jacket. but this way you can draw your
- [favourite album](https://wordhabit.com/favourite-album/) - sara groves' "conversations" i'm listening to it today realizing that i REALLY like just about every song...a rare occurrence for anyone i'm sure. my friend justin asked me the other day if there's an album i can listen to straight through and at the time i couldn't think of any. now i remember. yay sara!
- [quiet time](https://wordhabit.com/quiet-time/) - i really enjoy it. i am an introvert! i love people, mind you. i like to sit in a room filled with people and do my own thing. and many other times, i actually like interacting with them, too : )
- [110/73](https://wordhabit.com/11073-2/) - new BP, new perspective, new joy, new low moment yet everything under the sun is old. like my desire to control my environment. so if i initiate conversation, i'm expecting it to be reciprocated. and if i stay silent, i'm not expecting questions. but life isn't about getting my way. it's about giving and taking
- [to know is to see](https://wordhabit.com/to-know-is-to-see/) - now that i know you, i see you that's what someone said to me this morning a little while after having met her during a meeting. it's such truth! we often recognize people whether or not we've met them but the connection is that much more real visually when we've talked face to face. that
- [inanition--tears](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-tears/) - i've barely cried and i'm already sick of it. sick of it !
- [inanition--better when we're together](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-better-when-were-together/) - this time around i'm letting people love me up close. i'm letting friends into my world of pain and confusion and they want to be here...they're not annoyed. the love me. and this time around i'm less distressed because it's better when we're together. went to the beach tonight with Justin, Todd and Tricia. we
- [inanition--contentment](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-contentment/) - just talked to my RN Ida. she's lovely, a blessing to be around. she has this calm demeanour and she loves the Lord so beautifully. we spoke of contentment and doing God's will be it big or small in our eyes. as introverted as i can be, i love people. my NA, LaRunda, is a
- [inanition--day 3](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-day-3/) - BP: 114 over 69 now it's time for breakfast. i think i got too little; i'll have to order an omelet maybe. slept well. got the 5am wake up for life donation otherwise known as the blood draw. hope to see my RN and MD soooooooooooooooooooooooon...but i think i can be patience. after all, how
- [inanition: and now...higher](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-and-nowhigher/) - BP: 131 over 80 sprite before bed to calm the stomach talking to Tehani and LaTanya
- [inanition: and now...](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-and-now/) - BP: 115 over 73 it's up. i think it's from crying. bah humbug!
- [inanition--the bad part](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-the-bad-part/) - it's like i've been slapped silently, a strange abuse, a breach of contract. how dare you not say what i want to hear? looks like i won't be out of here till tomorrow. God, i'd love a miracle. is belief what you need? i don't have much, i'm sorry. help my unbelief...
- [inanition--friends](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-friends/) - Tricia has been the best roommate i could ask for right now. God, bless her extra today! we're opposite personalities which is especially great right now. she saw no other option but taking me to the ER. if it were up to me, i may still be at home...i dunno. she's knowledgeable too which is
- [inanition continues](https://wordhabit.com/inanition-continues/) - once again i have zero answers and this time around i have zero questions except "when can i get discharged?" this is my first time overnighting in a hospital. it's pretty cool. the temp is just right for sleeping. the service is great. my bed adjusts. the fruit is delicious. the eggs are suspect but
- [happiness is the Lord](https://wordhabit.com/happiness-is-the-lord/) - happiness is to know the Saviourliving a life that's in his favourhaving a change in my behaviourhappiness is the Lord real joy is mineno matter where the tear drops starti found the secretit's Jesus in my heart happiness is to be forgivenliving a life that's worth the livin'taking a trip that leads to heavenhappiness is
- [vision](https://wordhabit.com/vision/) - be my visionoh Lord of my heartdon't be anything else to meexcept what you are and you are loveso love me and remind me that you do
- [majoring in mis](https://wordhabit.com/majoring-in-mis/) - communication is not my forte. and to think i majored and mastered in english lit and minored in communication...maybe that's the problem--should have double-majored. man! so i've been miscommunicating a lot lately and then feeling as though i can't possibly back track and try to rectify anything. ahhhhhhhhhhhgggggggggggg why must i be so "complicated"? because
- [new blog?](https://wordhabit.com/new-blog/) - so i get bored with layouts and instead of just changing this one, i began a new one and then another one but we'll keep with the 2nd...for now. http://wordhabit2.blogspot.com i'm wordhabitting as many spaces as i can...i know...a bit obsessive...yeah yeah
- [seemingly irresponsible](https://wordhabit.com/seemingly-irresponsible/) - i'm always learning not to box God in. hi God. i'd like my regular dose of:1. a 4:30am divine wake up call2. my favourite (though expensive) granola 3. time with people i love4. creative energy5. rest when i finally get to bed6. desire to do homework7. etc and then God does something crazy...he gives me
- [what are you willing to do for what you really want?](https://wordhabit.com/what-are-you-willing-to-do-for-what-you-really-want/) - that's it. that's all i got to say...
- [you](https://wordhabit.com/you/) - smile to say i love you laugh to say i care gaze to say you understand ride to say you're there
- [the beginning](https://wordhabit.com/the-beginning/) - it's always the beginning...and i'm already tired
- [namesake](https://wordhabit.com/namesake/) - a name can really mess you up...or force you to discover who you really are. and who that is may be much farther from reality than you'd like to venture. but you keep messing up. so you must go. and when you do, things change. slowly. but they change. and finally you know contentment. i'm
- [conversations](https://wordhabit.com/conversations/) - they are the playground, the spaces in which we deepen connections at particular times, engage in see-saw merry-go-round interactions that teach us life lessons and wake us up like crazy dreams to the reality that we're still not done learning. it's 10pm and i'm so tired of learning and yet i can't get enough which
- [good morning](https://wordhabit.com/good-morning/) - i woke up to the idea that God wants to change the world through me. the thought hit and i was up, up like a jack in the box, wide-eyed like the five yr-old witnessing a magic trick. awake, fully conscious. change the world through me? it was a strange scene in my dream. two
- [divide](https://wordhabit.com/divide/) - ...Both I enjoy. Both I want to keep. Both are me—but not together. I sing from my heart in both spaces but there’s always a divide. Why? And the divide comes down to color and the divide is found in worship. Yet I’m fully aware that anything that has to do with God can’t afford
- [divide](https://wordhabit.com/divide-2/) - With both my arms outstretched, the two faces of my existence finally crash one into the other...(click)
- [light](https://wordhabit.com/light/) - it’s fascinating to see how light alters things, how the sun (for example) makes it hard to see the exact locale of the Frisbee in flight. so I knock it from the sky wishing I had more perception.
- [happy](https://wordhabit.com/happy/) - I wish I could explain the happy state I’m in. but it’s much too late at night to even try. So I’ll just be thankful that I’m soooo happy. Perhaps it all boils down to time well spent with fun low-key people. I should definitely do that more often. Okay. It’s 11:30pm. I’ve been up
- [bless the children](https://wordhabit.com/bless-the-children/) - A darling little girl lives in my neighborhood and makes it her duty to ride her bike up to my window and say hello. Her eyes look through the glass, past the blinds, seeking out my face. Today she’s off to the garden. She knows there are beans growing there and she promises upon her
- [thoughts from my cousin](https://wordhabit.com/thoughts-from-my-cousin/) - End Thought: I would encourage everyone to do a marathon at least once. It, for some, can be truly life changing, and propel people to change themselves. Such is great, but you do not need to run marathons and climb mountains to transform yourself. That often under used, abused and misquoted book, The Bible, can
- [alter ego?](https://wordhabit.com/alter-ego/) - wordhabit2 simply the "other" space. for what purpose? i like spaces...simple.
- [this is education---in uncompleted thought...](https://wordhabit.com/this-is-education-in-uncompleted-thought/) - (i'm taking 2 summer classes at the moment) this morning my prof said that the word "relationship" can't be found in the bible...not in the original languages, that is. instead, God uses the word "covenant" and such to describe what happens between Himself and humankind as well as between fellow humans. this afternoon my other
- [ants and soft beds](https://wordhabit.com/ants-and-soft-beds/) - the new apartment has been quite the experience... ...more details forthcoming
- [writing--just 10](https://wordhabit.com/writing-just-10/) - it's 6:55 am.i've been up for about an hour.i've been reading through Paul's writings for a class. now i want to linger a while and write and write and write because i promised God that i'd write more once i got this laptop. but there's always some excuse like fatigue or the intensity of summer
- [home and music](https://wordhabit.com/home-and-music/) - i'm all for enjoying life. granted, i can't afford to be selfish about it all the time. but this past weekend reminded me that smiles are more important than money. ah. home. and once again i got to enjoy music...it wasn't a perfect performance (i really have no vocal stamina) but it was a blessing
- [new job, new place](https://wordhabit.com/new-job-new-place/) - it's like....i don't know what it's like except that i'm so grateful...i'm not even giddy...just grateful. everything is beautiful in His time : ) now it's off to slumberville...with approximately 8 days till i sleep in a totally new space... aaahh
- [surprise?!?!](https://wordhabit.com/surprise-2/) - happy almost birthday Justin! good times were had by all. great summer salads, humas and pita...with ice cream and berries...a few "your mama" jokes...and the night ended with a quick set of Dutch Blitz! what more could you want? :) one of my favourite parts of the pre surprise was when Justin said, "I need
- [music](https://wordhabit.com/music-2/) - i really, really, really, really love music.i mean i really, really, really, really, really love music.i mean really! Eau Claire Set 1. Be Thou My Vision/Precious Lord 2. Do You Love God--Ab 3. Come Holy Spirit--A 4. Love Made Music--F (original composition) 5. Give Me Jesus--F-G
- [the blessings of Christian education](https://wordhabit.com/the-blessings-of-christian-education/) - tell me why God keeps on giving me reminders that it's all about Him and not at all about me. tell me why God keeps on making it crystal clear that at the end of all my successes, i've done nothing without Him. so, ladies and gentlemen who read this blog...i forgot my 2pm exam
- [google: have mercy, Lord](https://wordhabit.com/google-have-mercy-lord/) - i googled myself and found this. it is incredible on so many levels...read carefully. http://tobeistotri.blogspot.com/2006/05/steel-status-breathe.html how can we not do just what God has for us to do? talk about confirmation! and i don't need a NY Times best selling author to give me reassurance...i just need to write and watch God work. have mercy,
- [what do You want?](https://wordhabit.com/what-do-you-want/) - firstborn?don't have one land?don't own any house?if i had that i'd have land time?resources?heart?soul?mind?strength?song?word?smile?hug?hand?foot?eye? ...yeah, i've got all of those. but i'd much rather focus on what i don't have and turn it into what i desperately need and then jump at every opportunity to get it ...but i know what i'm supposed to do
- [triathlon tales](https://wordhabit.com/triathlon-tales/) - i could write a book of all the things i learned yesterday between the hours of 1 and 6. (that's not how long it took my team to complete the triathlon but it's roughly how long we were together--we completed in just over 2hrs 45 mins) the biggest lesson i learned is that i don't
- [why do you go...](https://wordhabit.com/why-do-you-go/) - to church on saturday/sunday?to mid-week prayer meetings?to small group bible studies?to any weekly christian gathering?like REALLY...why do you go?
- [demerara](https://wordhabit.com/demerara/) - sugar, good sugar, is so lovely. it's a beautiful experience all its own. none can compare to good sugar. ...take that as you will. and goodnight.
- [emotions...](https://wordhabit.com/emotions/) - i've grown up proud of the fact that i'm not a stereotypically emotional woman. but there's always something that triggers anger or rage or something exciting like that. last night it was the viewing of "Blood Diamonds." all of a sudden, at the film's end, i was royally ticked off by things i'd just seen/heard
- [it's snowing??](https://wordhabit.com/its-snowing/) - april showers? no may flowers? signs of the times people, signs of the times! http://www.andrews.edu/life/webcams/index.html
- [pretty nice](https://wordhabit.com/pretty-nice/) - today i had a huge moment of doubt. i was trying to take a nap when the damn broke, the wave hit, the flood of negative emotions began. i didn't cry. i wanted to. instead i just depressed myself by thinking that i'm not hearing the voice of God properly. several things have happened over
- [sermon prep](https://wordhabit.com/sermon-prep/) - it's so not like spoken word or singing....why????? well, there are some similarities but it's all so new, so unborn, so i-don't-know-what....and as for titles...the sight of blindness is a bit too literary and samson, why are you so stupid? is a bit too harsh. and untitled just does not work in this arena. so
- [10/10](https://wordhabit.com/1010-2/) - i got 10 out of 10 on my Greek quiz today. considering the fact that it's the quiz i felt the least prepared for (even though i really studied) i think of this as a miracle! i've got nothing but 9/10 every week, all semester. it's an online quiz and we get 3 tries! today
- [saying "thank you"](https://wordhabit.com/saying-thank-you/) - i was very bold today. realizing that the young man walking through the door i was holding open was too occupied on his cellphone to say "thank you," i said "you're welcome"...out loud. it was the sort of moment when you don't think twice, you just do. i didn't think he'd actually be aware enough
- [reflection](https://wordhabit.com/reflection/) - a friend's blog just reminded me of reflection's peace. so here i go... as i think about the week, the really fun times and the stuff i'd rather blow up, God's grace becomes more apparent to me and i rest there. today will not bother tomorrow nor will it allow yesterday to stop it from
- [the quote](https://wordhabit.com/the-quote/) - The prisoner imagines freedom to be more wonderful than it is.The patient imagines good health to be a source of ineffable pleasure--which it isn't.All that we lack is a sense of the divine.
- ["in the land of pain"](https://wordhabit.com/in-the-land-of-pain/) - trust me, it's a beautiful book by Daudet. i read it about a year ago probably...maybe more. it was necessary therapy at the time. the word usage is great. and i quoted from it this morning for dorm worship. i'll edit this post later and include it. why am i writing as if someone is
- [sermon topics -- feel free to comment](https://wordhabit.com/sermon-topics-feel-free-to-comment/) - these are sermon ideas that i'll likely develop to be preached for class in march and april. one must be OT and the other NT. "i thirst"when Jesus says these words while hanging on the cross, what's it all about? what's the scripture all about that needs fulfilling in the Psalms? is his a literal
- [surrender](https://wordhabit.com/surrender/) - it's incredible that the moment you fully surrender, passionately desire to follow God, do EVERYTHING He wants you to, things change dramatically....so you rest in the knowledge that His strength is perfect and He makes all things beautiful...in His time.
- [flight](https://wordhabit.com/flight/) - hours tossed likepebbles carelessly rippling water displaced endlesslytime lovingly hated runsjumps flies soaringpassionately tomorrow sits waitingtoday i sitlovingtryinghopefully displacing lazyso that i may fly too
- [old clothes](https://wordhabit.com/old-clothes/) - so i'm walking through the dorm, enjoying the comfort of my thrift store sweater when a student, probably no more than 19, says "my friend had that sweater. she wore it from 8th grade aaaaall the way to 12th." she said it with such pride in her memory. i heard it and felt the need
- [for friends](https://wordhabit.com/for-friends/) - i'm finding myself quite thankful for friends. whether it's a phone message or an email, they're often used by God in the simplest of ways to bless my life. and after i receive the blessing, i can do nothing else but turn to God in praise.these are the sorts of things that make life possible.and
- [when](https://wordhabit.com/when/) - whenigrowupi'llbemarriedwith childrenand a house...preferably with a lot of landand a dog outsideand a reliable carworking just enoughspending quality time with the famand happyand nowthati'mgrownupi'm somewhere on my way to some of thatbut what matters mostwhat i consider paramountis that i'm whereverdoing whateverwith whomeverloving Godi was thinking about age earlier today, about how i'll be 28
- [the same God](https://wordhabit.com/the-same-god/) - today God told me something really important. He said that i've seen Him in action this week as the God who gives peace and focus when papers are due and i'm lacking sleep. and then He said He's the same God at the beginning and middle of the semester.....so why am i waiting until now
- [impossibilities](https://wordhabit.com/impossibilities/) - when i get stressed i desire to rearrange, clean, go shopping...anything but what i'm supposed to be doing. but today has been productive...why that word? why must i be PRODUCTIVE? anyway, today has been filled with the desire to get my word study paper complete for tomorrow (which is actually today coz dec 6th is
- [come to me](https://wordhabit.com/come-to-me/) - God uses whatever's in your head to talk to you. while He may sometimes toss in brand new concepts to get your attention, He often makes timely use of the familiar.take the other day for example when i needed reassurance from God right away. all of a sudden i was singing "you're all i need
- [(RED)](https://wordhabit.com/red/) - http://www.joinred.com/manifesto.asp totally forgot december 1 was AIDS awareness day. i even read a story about AIDS to a room of highschoolers and still it didn't all click. but better late than never right? (well, sometimes)so here's what i read:AIDSI do my best not to make eye contact. If you make eye contact, they talk to
- [the summer](https://wordhabit.com/the-summer/) - sometimes you need to just smile or pose or whatever in front of a camera. and then you have to review the madness and smile, laugh, say "what was i thinking?" and then post them so the www can see : ) with bro anthony and dad....our facial expressions kill me! me and tricia @
- [surrender...random (very random) thoughts](https://wordhabit.com/surrender-random-very-random-thoughts/) - talked with a friend about what sabbath observance is all abouttalked to another friend about how our concept of time factors into sabbath observancegot a better perspective to approach first friend with regarding the sabbathread a chapter for spiritual formation class about surrender and got frustrated...who am i to tell you how to use your
- [i tried loving you](https://wordhabit.com/i-tried-loving-you/) - no, this is not a human love poem...trust me. it's me talking to God after recognizing His guidancei tried loving youhid the sunshine, packed the tearsdusted off a million fearswondered why i couldn't heari tried loving yousearched my heart in different landsheld the bible in my handtook a fall but not a standi tried loving
- [i really love life right now](https://wordhabit.com/i-really-love-life-right-now/) - i don't have time (never do) to explain why i love life right now but i just want ya'll to know that i do. i could spend hours counting God's blessings...i really like knowing that.
- [sailing](https://wordhabit.com/sailing/) - vacation days ended on friday :( but i'm sooooooo thankful i was able to have them! now we're in day 2 of a retreat for all the Deans, RAs, and DAs in our dorm. it has been quite challenging. had i remembered what it was like 7 years ago, i probably wouldn't have applied this
- [vacation day 1](https://wordhabit.com/vacation-day-1/) - first day of vacation doesn't seem like vacation...didn't get up early enough...it's all about the crack of dawn baby! this'll be all over too soon... oh what a tangled web we weavewhen all we want is to acheive first comes lovethen come marriagethen comes the... okay, laundry awaits :)
- [don't want to sleep](https://wordhabit.com/dont-want-to-sleep/) - (wish i had a laptop...soon.) i'm feeling a bit restless but awefully tired and yet happy all at once. despite the last post, i'm a happy woman. so i'd rather stay awake and contemplate my happiness. i'm in the office that i share with 3 others. my plants are here b/c my place is too
- [keeping it real](https://wordhabit.com/keeping-it-real/) - how does that go exactly? how do i maintain honesty when folks don't want to hear it and when i'm not even always open to the option? and how do i stay positive as i council others?girl, they aren't all bad. trust me, there's hope, there's one for you.sure, it's truth and i'm not anywhere
- [from the heart](https://wordhabit.com/from-the-heart/) - though i fear verbal diarrhea in this moment, it's about time i write...it's been so long...feels like months and months but it's only been weeks.let's start with blessing:1. i'm still happy to be here. my advisor keeps asking me if i'm still happy with my decision to come...it's part of his way of checking up
- [sabbath.rest.literally](https://wordhabit.com/sabbath-rest-literally/) - tomorrow morning will be spent sleeping for ALAP...that's "As Long As Possible."i'm so tired. and my body really hates me for being so mean to it. how dare you go to bed at 11 and wake up at 3 one day then go to bed at 11 and wake up at 4 another day then
- [GBP (God Be Praised)](https://wordhabit.com/gbp-god-be-praised/) - i got that one from my dad via msn messenger...go figure! the parents are more "im" savvy than the children. have mercy!!well, GBP indeed coz life is good. let me tell you how.i came back to school because i knew God wanted me to...i'm enjoying school and work...i don't know if i've ever been so
- [quick update](https://wordhabit.com/quick-update/) - i had a quiz in my church history class today. and i got 5 out of 5! you may be asking "so what? that's 5 stinkin points...what's the big deal?"listen, i came here to get an education and get it good. that means "A" grades. i know...it's not a matter of salvation but the 5
- [and it's go girls go!](https://wordhabit.com/and-its-go-girls-go/) - this stuff ain't no joke! 2 classes and i'm worn out. haven't even read. began work today. now i'm off to sleep. i'll wake up early and read. it'll be quite the adventure. it's amazing to have so much to do and yet know it'll all get done! one step at a time.... : )i
- [cemetery....i mean, seminary! hehe](https://wordhabit.com/cemetery-i-mean-seminary-hehe/) - the hours continue to fly. tomorrow i'll have my first two classes, one of which i've heard will kick my butt! but i'm fine with that. if it's tough but good, i'm up for it! i'm sure i'll have much to say on class toughness, student-teacher relations, student-student relations, etc. we had new seminary student
- [hello world](https://wordhabit.com/hello-world-2/) - i'm tired. i'd like to lay outside and sleep in the wind, soak up the sky. perhaps it'll fit in my pores....perhaps i'll remember it's face, be able to recall it during claustrophobic michigan days. but if nothing more, i'll remember that it made me smile. that is, perhaps, the most poetic thing i've written
- [au seminary](https://wordhabit.com/au-seminary/) - oh my oh my oh my here is yesterday's mass email: i'm in! and now i'm sad i don't want to leave here....that may sound crazy but it's true. i should be happy coz i know i'm doing what God wants me to do. but right now, at 1:38 pm, i'm sad. but on a
- [jazzzzzzzzzzzzzz](https://wordhabit.com/jazzzzzzzzzzzzzz/) - oh yeah!i was backed by a jazz band today....so lovely! i've never had this experience, not big band style. i messed up a few times...forgot when to come in. but oh well. folks probably didn't know. and hey, i only practiced with the band twice and one of those times i only practiced one song.
- [filling in blanks](https://wordhabit.com/filling-in-blanks/) - i don't have it all worked out just yet though i wish i did because then i could explain myself better and my experience could be a much more powerful witness...one day.for now, while it's still pre 10pm, i'll say this: while on the "just a closer walk with Jesus" journey, it's important to not
- [wear your heels!](https://wordhabit.com/wear-your-heels/) - today was the best sunday i've had in a very long time. it was just a great day period. i woke up well rested, though desirous (as usual) of a little more time under the covers. the last two days found me feeling fluish--NOT GOOD! so saturday night i got to sleep earlier than usual
- [moving.on.](https://wordhabit.com/moving-on/) - i've been learning a lot, A LOT, of lessons lately. the growing pains absolutely stink but i'm thankful God has patience. the lessons are:i should not allow my hair to mess up my subconscious and therefore control (limit) my behaviour unnecessarilyi should welcome the sense of urgency to live a life that pleases the Lordi
- [strange happiness](https://wordhabit.com/strange-happiness/) - today i didn't get much work done because i was frustrated with a couple of things...my hair was one of those things. i made the executive decision to stop wasting time working (i really wasn't accomplishing anything) and tackle my frustrations. so i did. and praise the Lord! victory!! well, not completely. but i'm definitely
- [hair](https://wordhabit.com/hair-2/) - it's helping me see my need for Jesus. yes, to some of you that's really really strange. but it's real. baby steps.
- [body.shape.size](https://wordhabit.com/body-shape-size/) - a highly profound thought just crossed my mind, one i'm sure you're dying to read! so here you go....it's nice to live in a region of north america in which shapely white women reside. and i'm not talking about 50 yr old white women who've "let themselves go"....no, i'm talking about 25, 28, 33 yr
- [the day after](https://wordhabit.com/the-day-after/) - so last night was chill and a lot of fun. i've decided that mid-week parties are the way to go...why not? it seems there's never enough time with friends. you make time over the weekend, you run into each other in the store, you chat on the phone, you "im," you check up on each
- [ah.](https://wordhabit.com/ah/) - watched "hoosiers" tonight. such a lovely movie. it's a strange relief when you watch something that has no bad language, no sex, no hints at something nasty or unnecessary....just clean, healthy, fun. tomorrow's my birthday. yay! what other unrelated thought can i throw in here? i bought hockey skates! yay!
- [it's been a year](https://wordhabit.com/its-been-a-year/) - since i've been blogging. lovely.it's official...."lovely" is one of my favourite words.yum.okay....must walk and sing and talk and smile.
- [skaaaaaaaating](https://wordhabit.com/skaaaaaaaating/) - lovely!!!! (no, that's not where i skated)skating is enough like rollerblading that it wasn't hard. (it was my second time on the ice. the first time was about 7 years ago!) and the ice was smooth enough and the night was warm yet cold enough. and the sky was dark enough. and the pond was
- [so much better](https://wordhabit.com/so-much-better/) - i realize that this could be short lived...if i let it. but regardless, i must document this moment. and as overused a phrase though it be, God is good!!!i sang like my life depended on it...it often does. music has a way of reaching me more than i think it reaches those i'm there to
- [i'm crying](https://wordhabit.com/im-crying/) - because once again i'm tired of being tired. because i don't feel strong and though feelings only go so far i want mine to be positive. because in about four hours i'll sing for a revelation seminar and i'm not ready. because instead of singing words of encouragement i want to be sung to. because
- [it's the same](https://wordhabit.com/its-the-same/) - i feel the way i felt with george w. won....the winds of change are upon us! the signs of the times continually show. glad i couldn't vote....gives me permission to gripe whenever i choose. because, of course, had i been allowed to vote, things would be different. right. yeah. whatever. it's the same. i'm still
- [i'd like you to travel with me](https://wordhabit.com/id-like-you-to-travel-with-me/)
- [not enough, not enough](https://wordhabit.com/not-enough-not-enough/) - i've desired this moment for days. and for days i've either had much to do or have lacked the sense to schedule this in making it nothing more than a passing thought.ah. sadness.and no, i didn't schedule it in today and i don't have a moment to spare really. i'm stealing from other responsibilities.is this
- [ah, food](https://wordhabit.com/ah-food/) - I must confess...I've been a Scrooge... For the first time, the entire season could come and go and I wouldn't mind. (Some of you know how I've been "bah humbugging" Christmas music and I make no apologies coz so much of it truly stinks.) And I've concluded that my lack of enthusiasm is all because
- [question](https://wordhabit.com/question/) - when someone asks how are you? are you required to answer truthfully?i've often responded in truth but haven't been heard. the words i'm sick seem to translate into i'm fine. and are responded to with good, good. and a part of me hopes that the guilty party doesn't see the disdain within me that's most
- [not enough](https://wordhabit.com/not-enough/) - time....or should i say that there is enough and i just haven't figured out how best to use it all? yes, that's more accurate, je pense. oui!and that's all i have time for...so sad...too bad.
- [bigger.than.me.better.than.dreams](https://wordhabit.com/bigger-than-me-better-than-dreams/) - it's one of those airplane shots that remind me of how much is beyond me, beyond my best of dreams.and then it motivates me...to use my time better, to waste not a second, to live as if i actually enjoy living.so i do it.my life is again on the cusp of something new, something amazingly
- [nature's music](https://wordhabit.com/natures-music/) - ...a thousand wishes down below... ...when one thing goes, another comes and that's alright...
- [okay now](https://wordhabit.com/okay-now/) - [the picture represents the confusion in my head.] my esl students want me to hang out with them at the bar saturday night. i don't drink, smoke or shake my thang on dance floors with low lighting. but does that matter? they promised to by me a jug of water :) what if i brought
- [grand scheming](https://wordhabit.com/grand-scheming/) - in the grand scheme of things...otherwise known as life...my momentary fatigue matters not. i should have stayed up this morning. i should have taken just a few moments to look around. i would have realized all that could have been accomplished. but i concluded that more sleep was most important and since i seemingly had
- [getting too relevant](https://wordhabit.com/getting-too-relevant/) - in this age of being relevant, i wonder where the boundaries lie. how far can i go in my attempt to be relevant before becoming irrelevant? i'm particularly conscious of this when it comes to church, to religion, to organized religion. (do folks really have a problem with organized religion or are they just frustrated
- [in case you haven't heard](https://wordhabit.com/in-case-you-havent-heard/) - an 18 yr old was shot outside the Toronto West SDA Church during the funeral service of his 17 yr old friend. this just happened on friday. the church is now a crime scene.gangs. if we use the word informally, many of us are part of some sort of gang. perhaps we call our gang
- [really.short.need.sleep](https://wordhabit.com/really-short-need-sleep/) - MOREwe need not focus on being unique. rather, we need to focus on being a masterpiece....Eph 2:10....God's creation....being the people HE created us to be with our specific gifts.we shouldn't aim to simply be happy. that's global thinking. our minds need to look beyond earth.then people will see that we are God's creation. they may
- [home.sick](https://wordhabit.com/home-sick/) - my students are homesick. they won't spend christmas with their families. to see the sadness on their faces is one thing...to hear the sadness is another. hearing is so much harder than seeing yet we miss the eyes more than the ears it seems--sight is the most prized of the five senses. i can relate.
- [be.free](https://wordhabit.com/be-free/) - oh freedomoh freedomoh freedom over meand before i'll be a slavei'll be burried in my graveand go home to my Lordand be free i'm in a singing mood.
- [i'll fly away](https://wordhabit.com/ill-fly-away/) - some glad morningwhen this life is overi'll fly away...when i die, hallelujah by and byi'll fly away now that's where i get a bit confused. is it talking about being immediately taken up to heaven after death? if so, i guess i can't sing the song. darn.
- [correction.advice.direction](https://wordhabit.com/correction-advice-direction/) - i'm working more on my writing...it's a love-hate combo. well, hate's a bit strong. sometimes the editing/reworking process is actually enjoyable. other times it's a right pain. today has been good. more and more, i'm recognizing the value in other ppl's opinion of my work. sometimes my work is good and sometimes it's not. i
- [rocks.brooms.sliders.whiplash](https://wordhabit.com/rocks-brooms-sliders-whiplash/) - curling is fabulous! it's the sort of thing you can't do just once...well, i can't do it just once even though my first time has left me in pain...but i'll discuss that later.i'm trying to think of how curling is analogous to living. i typically create ineffective analogies so perhaps i shouldn't try now. but
- [jazz.sleep.questions](https://wordhabit.com/jazz-sleep-questions/) - two nights later....i saw/heard jane bunnett and the spirits of havana...lovelysidenote: i've tried to describe music lately and no adjective seems sufficient/qualified/right.(meanwhile, back on the ranch) jane plays soprano sax and flute...wicked tone and finger action...her entire being connects to the music. the spirits of havana include trumpet, standing bass, drums, congas, and keyboard. i
- [apparently](https://wordhabit.com/apparently/) - millions of teens across north america blog. they detail deeply personal things that would shock, and do shock, the pants off their parents. blogging has replaced the dear old diary in a way that is so public, some teens are paying the price...not only are their parents finding out but so are predators. because of
- [the morning after](https://wordhabit.com/the-morning-after/) - forgive the title but understand that with mornings come all sorts of regrets and brilliant thoughts, the thoughts that somehow escaped you just hours prior. the interview was good..............i think. the committee was very inviting, almost too inviting. in retrospect, i feel as if they weren't as hard on me as they could have been.
- [freedom](https://wordhabit.com/freedom/) - is that what we live for? do we work each day so that we don't have to be a slave to something? is that it? because if it is, i'll gladly never work again.but wait...i think i'm already there. sorry for the rest of you, doing the verb so you don't have to be the
- [only a child](https://wordhabit.com/only-a-child/) - tonight i knocked at doors to get donations for the Canadian Diabetes Association. my favourite house had a mum, a little girl, and a little boy. as the mum went to her purse, the little girl (who couldn't have been more than 6 said, mum, what are you doing? getting money to give to the
- [my 7-day journey](https://wordhabit.com/my-7-day-journey/) - written on October 6, 2005 around 5 pmAs of 5 and one-quarter hours ago, it's official. In case I haven't yet told you and in case news hasn't made its way through the grapevine, I've submitted my resume for the position of Associate Pastor of the College Heights SDA Church in Lacombe, Alberta.I'm imagining your
- [wishing it could be easier](https://wordhabit.com/wishing-it-could-be-easier/) - but so many good things are born out of struggle.so i struggle...i determine that i'll pray on this one thing. i'll pray until i see change. aaahhhhh. man! as i write, i learn. as i learn, i get ticked off. do i really have to pray about that too?yeah, sorry. no explanations today. just words
- [slowly but](https://wordhabit.com/slowly-but/) - i'm feeling a bit more awake today. by 4 o'clock yesterday afternoon i was wasted. justin and i went to hear the AU symphony play at HPAC. all things considered, it was pretty good. i was quite awake for the first two pieces but after intermission, my eyes really started to ache, the left one
- [10 years...many lessons](https://wordhabit.com/10-years-many-lessons/) - ten years ago, i began my senior year of high school. to some that's a ridiculous amount of years. to me, it's simply life.life's been a whole lot of things...good...bad...stupid...surprising...refreshing........this weekend was spent with former classmates, their spouses, their children, their growth, their familiar personas, the craziness that is still us....we are who we are
- [a while](https://wordhabit.com/a-while/) - that's what it's been...a while.haven't done a lot of things in a while.haven't slept for long.haven't exercised.haven't written in this here space.and most importantly, it seems, i haven't read for a good period of time. it shows as i type and key "write" instead of "right" or "hear" instead of "here"...those are called homophomes in
- [late nights](https://wordhabit.com/late-nights/) - tomorrow, or this morning rather, i'll have to go back to bed after everyone is gone. it's already after 1:00am and at this rate i won't make it to actual sleep until 2. and yes, all this could have been avoided if i'd just started out my week correctly.thankfully tomorrow's not friday.yeah, i'm kicking myself.
- [talking to God](https://wordhabit.com/talking-to-god/) - that's not faith. knowing that I want you to do something in order for you to do it isn't faith.are You serious? then what in the world is it? what about abraham? he knew that You wanted him to move to an unknown so he did it. he didn't know what was out there but
- [pain produces life and i'm not sure where life's going](https://wordhabit.com/pain-produces-life-and-im-not-sure-where-lifes-going/) - in an essential sermon, shot strait from the hip and into my heart, i heard truth. i wish i heard more of it regularly.today has been weird. it began comme d'habitude....i woke up tired. slowly but surely, i got myself together, ate and all that good stuff. i made it to the week of prayer
- [good](https://wordhabit.com/good/) - not simply how i'm feeling but how i'm seeing life, sensing it's direction...
- [honesty](https://wordhabit.com/honesty/) - it's the word i can't seem to get enough of. it jumps out of my mouth just about every too seconds. i should be honest, you should be honest, we should be honest, too many aren't trying to be honest, we're all afraid of being honest.and as soon as i want to be honest, i
- [lighten up? i'll just keep it real...](https://wordhabit.com/lighten-up-ill-just-keep-it-real/) - am i too rigid? am i so old-school that i can’t chill, have a little fun? no. i just don’t mind playing by the rules. and i know that when you do so, you can still have a whole lot of fun. yes. okay. case closed.on to other news....i've made some decisions and i really
- [flash back...flash forward](https://wordhabit.com/flash-back-flash-forward/) - the last several days have been so busy. i wake up each morning feeling as if i just went to bed. for all the fatigue, i should be rolling in millions by now. but that's alright...i'm rolling in blessings. honestly, i'm not yet where i want to be. you know, traveling singer/writer, performing before scores
- [baby steps](https://wordhabit.com/baby-steps/) - my first official gig....over....good times
- [9/11, skepticism, realism, build a schism](https://wordhabit.com/911-skepticism-realism-build-a-schism/) - oprah. oh oprah. here i go to badmouth, once again, one of your shows. but at least this time i watched it for 10 minutes, okay?alright.here goes.the man sound rehearsed. sounds like he told his mother, told his wife, told his brother, told his co-workers, told his baker, told his butcher, told his grandson's history
- [time](https://wordhabit.com/time/) - it's been a busy time, these last several days. preparing for a mini-concert and a church performance. my energy levels are crazy and i should get to bed soon to hopefully increase them.strep throat is evil. how can something that attacks the throat damage your entire body? okay, so maybe not my entire body but
- [if i'd](https://wordhabit.com/if-id/) - if i'd been reacting in an age-appropriate manner to destruction all my life, maybe i'd know how to feel now.if i'd been honest voicing my frustration with destruction all my life, maybe i'd know how to speak now.but maybe i can learn. but maybe i don't have to. i can only feel what rocks my
- [katrina = reality check](https://wordhabit.com/katrina-reality-check/) - we're americans and we're used to winning -- lou dobbssorry lou; that's probably why you're losing now.i don't mean to sound flippant regarding what's been going down down south but man, it's hard. and all this discussion about who's at fault, who was slow, who has been inefficient, etc., isn't getting anything done except adding
- [what can i say](https://wordhabit.com/what-can-i-say/) - deeply saddened?outraged?grieved?at a loss for words?no, honestly, it's hard for me to use any of those when i think about my gut reaction to what's going down in Louisiana.are you serious? yes. i've said it before and i'll say it again. it's hard for me to think about a bad situation that isn't affecting me
- [blessing](https://wordhabit.com/blessing/) - that's all i want to be and certainly what i received after listening to a voice i haven't heard in ages! veruschka is her name and her cd recently found its way to my local abc. as i glanced through the featured cds, i was surprised to see a face i actually know. we sang
- [laryngitis](https://wordhabit.com/laryngitis/) - now, now when i want to sing, when i want nothing more than to open my mouth and wail, i've got what i think is laryngitis. yes, i'll go to the doctor later on and get an official word. but whatever it is, it sucks rocks! and i'm doing all i can to make it
- [no sunshine](https://wordhabit.com/no-sunshine/) - i thought i heard we'd have sunshine and we did this morning. i slept with my window open and woke up warm. by noon it was cold. it's still cold now at 3:40pm. and i've got a cold and all i want to do is watch a movie. but anyway, it could all be worse.
- [i don't know](https://wordhabit.com/i-dont-know/) - i'm not sure what it is i'm not able to know but i feel as if i don't. it's weird. it's an "off" feeling. like when you know a certain food is no longer good but you're not sure how exactly you know--there's no funky smell, no mold--but you just know it's off. i don't
- [dead](https://wordhabit.com/dead/) - that's what my optical nerve is. dead. and there's no human remedy presently available to wake it.a miracle.to be honest, i'm tired of praying for one. i got tired almost 2 years ago, not that long after my optical nerve died.i'm not sure how i feel about how i feel and what that says about
- [btk -- billy the kid?](https://wordhabit.com/btk-billy-the-kid/) - no. bind torture kill (in case you aren't up on the news).he's getting all life sentences with no possibility of parole until 40 years from now when he'll be 100. and if he's put among the prisons general population with no one to guard his safety, he'll be lucky to live even half those years.
- [so....](https://wordhabit.com/so/) - went to the doctor.not pleased.felt dismissed from the moment she walked through the door.felt like smacking her upside her head.and you know, it's not because she didn't say what i wanted to hear. it's because she didn't try to explore the notion that taking an aspirin a day will be damaging. it's that she didn't
- [no computer](https://wordhabit.com/no-computer/) - my laptop decided to lose it's mind this morning. apparently, there's some sort of error in the system that needs some fixin. i was sad when my dad took it to get looked at. i felt as if a part of me was sick. i know, it's sad. i'm addicted to my laptop. but it's
- [5:30am](https://wordhabit.com/530am/) - i just had a really great chill season with a guy who's like a little brother...he's actually one of my little brother's friends. i'm getting together with a few folks to sing an a cappella number this weekend; he's one of them. we talked for a couple of hours. it's amazing how easy it is
- [yeah](https://wordhabit.com/yeah/) - i need some time...give me a few minutes, or hours...tomorrow's good. okay, maybe just a few minutes. i need to write. so here: i'm starting a new ministry which is, in a way, like starting a new life. it's called m3ministry and instead of telling you a whole lot about it, i'll allow you to
- [mad as hell](https://wordhabit.com/mad-as-hell/) - i just read the side effects of aspirin. why didn't you do that before? you may ask...well, i trust most doctors. and when you've experienced something as crazy as sight loss and your doctor tells you that 81 mg of aspirin per day is a good thing because it seems that your sight loss is
- [so, i guess i have to](https://wordhabit.com/so-i-guess-i-have-to/) - take a step back and say that the oprah episode i spoke of wasn't actually a piece of trash. i suppose i should have watched it before judging. i was told by my sister that it was actually a good view, informational in fact. don't judge a book by it's cover, blah, blah, blah....i'm still
- [things to be thankful for:](https://wordhabit.com/things-to-be-thankful-for/) - i'm getting rid of the nashville weighti feel as if i'm getting a job that won't consume all my energyi'm heading in a direction God wants me ini ate some nice tasting mangoi'll be in bed by 11 tonightthings to be upset about:i ate too much mangomaybe i won't get to bed by 11 tonightdialup
- [sophisticated](https://wordhabit.com/sophisticated/) - i warmed up my lunch and took it downstairs in hopes of watching something good while i ate. (you should know that i hardly watch television because there's hardly ever anything worthwhile on. and by worthwhile i mean, worthy of my time away from the many other things that occupy each precious moment that graces
- [networking](https://wordhabit.com/networking/) - what's to much in the networking world? selling one's soul, i guess. and that's certainly not what i want to do. i'd much rather sit back and have people just knock down my door but that's not going to happen. i have to be assertive. i have to be a go-getter. it's so not my
- [high speed](https://wordhabit.com/high-speed/) - while the loading of my blog reminds me of how nice it would be to have a speedier internet connection, being home reminds me of how i felt exactly a year ago when i returned to alberta from chicago not wanting to work but feeling an extreme urge to be doing something like work. let
- [i'm back at home](https://wordhabit.com/im-back-at-home/) - i'm fat (okay, so maybe i'm not fat but i've gained weight and must work seriously on getting rid of my new stomach and thighs).i'm tired.and i feel as if the last two weeks were a dream. i lived them so quickly. i want to relive them or get an extension of them. i'm afraid
- [it's](https://wordhabit.com/its/) - overi didn't have time to detail this last night. after the program, i went to eat with ben speer and several other people. it was a nice way to end the day. but i kind of wish we'd ended with a really calm fire-side sort of fellowship. we didn't need to sing camp fire songs,
- [i'm in](https://wordhabit.com/im-in/) - so yeah, i'm in...twice. solo and quartet! i'm praising God. the quartet is hot. we had so much fun last night. and we're each so different so together we make a very very unique mix. the bass is a typical male bass singer. then there's me. the lead is a girl with a lot of
- [prayers answered](https://wordhabit.com/prayers-answered/) - they announced this morning that the rules have changed for all. we can audition for both solo and group. so that's happening this evening. i'm going to eat lunch quickly then practice a bit before afternoon classes begin.my stomach doesn't feel good (too much info?) maybe it's a combo of nervousness, fatigue and too much
- [thank You](https://wordhabit.com/thank-you/) - God!tonight was better. i began by taking a 10 minute breather in a building i'd never entered here before. i sat in the foyer that was lovingly quiet except for the young man locking things up. it's okay; you can stay. so i did. i just sat there as my stomach tried to untie its
- [what's the plan?](https://wordhabit.com/whats-the-plan/) - i came here to learn. i came to be a student, to sit at the feet of knowledge for two weeks. the weekend was my break. now i just want to keep on treading through all the theory and all the groups singing, etc.but some folks are here to make a name. and yes, i
- [saying goodbye](https://wordhabit.com/saying-goodbye-2/) - i know it's not yet friday but i've already had to say goodbye.his name is Tinker. he's 64. about 6'4. slim build. a nice crop of grey hair. mustache. a rich low voice. he's simply wonderful. (don't worry, i haven't fallen in love with a man old enough to be my grand/dad.)Tinker was kind to
- [i'm about](https://wordhabit.com/im-about/) - 2 days behind. i hate that. how'd i get 2 days behind on the calendar? it's this busy schedule i suppose.there's something i forgot to mention yesterday, i think. i was sitting at lunch, minding my business, when one of the voice teachers came up to me. he said he enjoyed my singing friday night
- [aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa](https://wordhabit.com/aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa/) - wow. today has been a day! like a full day! like an amazingly wowing day!i had my last lesson with stephen hill today. again, we talked for almost 45 minutes. so, what are you going to do?with what?with that mechanics class you were talking about. common, what do you think i'm asking about?oh music?hahah. yeah,
- [it's racial](https://wordhabit.com/its-racial/) - haha. do you think i'm about to discuss some injustice done me? well, i'm not. i'm actually about to talk more about southern gospel music.i've been intrigued by the fact that i'm the darkest here but didn't want to ask anyone here for fear of offending, etc. i'm already not republican (something i will not
- [i was](https://wordhabit.com/i-was/) - going to write something profound but i left my journal in my room. sorry. maybe next time :)it's sunday afternoon and i'm relaxed. it's so nice. i find comfort in the knowledge that last week was a good week, a week well spent. i went to church yesterday and had a good time with church
- [tired](https://wordhabit.com/tired/) - i sang again tonight. before the program was over, i left with a couple of others to practice a song. i was kind of happy about that. it meant that i wouldn't have to walk out and be met by numerous people saying nice things about my song. it's not that i think it was
- [the truth](https://wordhabit.com/the-truth/) - what is it you just have to do? what is it your life depends on? open up yourself and do it. don't worry about who's watching or if no one's watching or listening. whether you're in your car or bathroom or in front of 10,000, do it right. let it come out of you honestly.
- [excited...humbled...thrilled...slightly confused](https://wordhabit.com/excited-humbled-thrilled-slightly-confused/) - southern gospel music is certainly more than meets the eye/ear. it's a culture i appreciate more now, i respect more now, i'm excited about more now... i sang today during performance training. it's during this section that allison durham speer lets you sing then critiques you or critiques you while you're singing. i was really
- [this'll be short](https://wordhabit.com/thisll-be-short/) - people are waiting... please ya'll. do what you love. it may take a while to get up and running but please, do what makes you glad to be alive. God wants that for us!! it's not selfish. it's called walking with God. and also, when in the south, shut your mouth about being a democrat
- [water](https://wordhabit.com/water/) - i'm not as drained as i was 24 hours ago. i've been drinking crazy amounts of water which i think has helped. maybe i'll have enough life in me in the morning to go for a walk before breakfast...that's been my desire since day one. heard some really great music today. some nice simple beautiful
- [Honesty](https://wordhabit.com/honesty-2/) - The San Francisco 49ers were playing the Seahawks at Seattle’s home stadium on a mild Sunday night in October. Leaving my hotel room to take a stroll, I found an upscale, dimly lit corner restaurant where folks could eat while watching an entire wall of big-screen TVs. The noise from the West Coast fans poured
- [nashville -- day 2](https://wordhabit.com/nashville-day-2/) - southern accents are fabulous! along with the word choices. "i might could pick it all up if i tried." day 2 has been good but i'm even more draining so i'll try for an earlier bed time. i had my first voice lesson today. stephen is fun and i know i'll learn a lot. i
- [nashville - day 1](https://wordhabit.com/nashville-day-1/) - i didn't get any sleep last night so at minutes to 8 at night, i'm more than exhausted! i don't even know how to describe this. as i waited to board the plane this morning, i began journaling my emotions. i was conflicted. i hate leaving home in a rush. i like to have everything
- [Ephesians 6:10-18](https://wordhabit.com/ephesians-610-18/) - Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the
- [so far removed](https://wordhabit.com/so-far-removed/) - i've often wondered why i don't feel when things crumble. certain pain just doesn't hurt me. it has to be close, not close in proximity but close in memory. hotel rwanda hurt b/c it reminded me of liberia. 9/11 didn't do much. the london bombs didn't do much. i wish i could feel pain beyond
- [i wish](https://wordhabit.com/i-wish/) - i could help
- [for crying out loud](https://wordhabit.com/for-crying-out-loud/) - if we hadn't been exposed if we hadn't traveled so far away from birth places at such young ages if we hadn't been told if we hadn't heard that anything we touch can become gold or at least something precious if we hadn't been praised if we hadn't reveled in the knowledge of jobs well
- [bad lookin](https://wordhabit.com/bad-lookin/) - this is what should happen when you spend too much time looking at something you shouldn't be looking at. your eyes should pain you like someone's reached into your head, behind your eyes, grabbed hold of your optic nerves (or whatever's back there) and is gently but cruelly holding them captive between fingers, patient fingers,
- [what would you](https://wordhabit.com/what-would-you/) - say no to in order to be happy? could you just be happy in order to say no? why not just give up your notion of happy? sing a song you've never heard before... "sometimes words just jump into your head you don't know what they mean but somehow they make sense..."
- [clearing out, finding blessings](https://wordhabit.com/clearing-out-finding-blessings/) - i'm spending more time than i wish (dialup) clearing out my inbox. each time i do this, i come across an email from a friend that i need to respond to but words escape me. in her email, she tells me what a blessing i've been to her in the short time we've known each
- [really?](https://wordhabit.com/really/) - is it all so simple? is there really no gray area? yes. i told God i'd do whatever and i meant it and still mean it. whatever. wherever. whenever. however. no matter how daunting or unrealistic it seems to be. even if my stomach is filled with butterflies all the way through it. even if
- [the blessed haze](https://wordhabit.com/the-blessed-haze/) - the haze on my possible prostitution calms me, brings me down many notches to a point on my life map i cannot find too many clouds i just can't do it, can't get paid for my gifts when they're not being used correctly, efficiently, effectively, cloud trillion call me crazy i'm not experiencing confusion because
- [stuff is simpler now](https://wordhabit.com/stuff-is-simpler-now/) - that's all i wanted to say. thanks for listening. :)
- [i feel like or as if](https://wordhabit.com/i-feel-like-or-as-if/) - i got a piece of "knowing" -- the kind that is relational, involves two people, real conversation and simple knowledge. i know, i'm being a bit vague but i know what i'm talking about and it's good times :) no list just knowledge and happy memories the wedding was wonderful. the bride is a close
- [before i nap](https://wordhabit.com/before-i-nap/) - i thought it'd be more than appropriate to discuss my morning. i got to sing. it passed so quickly. all of a sudden we were sitting in the pews. why do good moments pass like that? i was part of a praise and worship team at a contemporary church, you know, the kind of church
- [should we stay?](https://wordhabit.com/should-we-stay/) - sda education has its + and its - so we stay? should we stay? i'm torn when it comes to my younger siblings. their first year of university will be sda. after that...i want to encourage them to go somewhere else, somewhere non-sda. allow them to taste the outside, the place we're supposed to go
- [things left unspoken](https://wordhabit.com/things-left-unspoken/) - build up then explode fear ties tongues then breaks hearts but like some money says in God i trust
- [peace comes in dying...to self, not from the task](https://wordhabit.com/peace-comes-in-dying-to-self-not-from-the-task/) - when you know that what you say to someone will absolutely crush them, and when you know that you must say it anyway, but you don't want to because even though you hate the actions, you love the person, but you have to say it because God told you to let Him use you to
- [i'm reconsidering](https://wordhabit.com/im-reconsidering/) - sleep...once again. i'd rather be tired. and yes, i've fully diagnosed my problem but i won't take the time to detail it here. i'll just say that this song i'm listening to right now helps me realize my problem even more. a mi manera...i did it my way doing things my way has never sounded
- [what if a break is good?](https://wordhabit.com/what-if-a-break-is-good/) - i'm in charge of a young adult ministry. nothing's happened since march-ish. i take the blame but it's not as if people are knocking down my door or tying up my phone line asking what the deal is. i was just visited by this thought: what if nothing happens until august? what if we take
- [classical music](https://wordhabit.com/classical-music/) - lulled us, but not to sleep. we sat, we three black siblings, eating our tomato soup with crackers in it and biscuits on the side. we sat in silence because classical sounds have that affect on we three black siblings. it doesn't excite us to converse. i broke the silence. me: did you guys know
- [i'm reconsidering...](https://wordhabit.com/im-reconsidering-2/) - the way i relate to sleep. i've always wanted to be in the know. but i never want to have to ask. just want to be told. so when i sleep, unless there's something in particular i want to ponder ASAP, i think of sleep as an inconvenience. why must i lie there, close my
- [i'm reconsidering...](https://wordhabit.com/im-reconsidering-3/) - the way i relate to my hair. yes, perhaps it's not the most profound thing in your book but in mine, it's serious stuff. my hair is so important that i've written poems about it, devoted words and hours to explore its nature and what that means for me. i've even cried over it and
- [mysterious ways](https://wordhabit.com/mysterious-ways/) - i don't know why a lot of things are the way they are. like how people are blessed by what i allow God to do through me. like how i'm blessed even though i'm clearly human. i don't know the why...but i'm thankful for the now and for the when. i'm content in the how
- [time away](https://wordhabit.com/time-away/) - breeds discontent breeds unnecessary attitude breeds a truckload of regret breeds this wish: that i never had to wake up to the knowledge that i keep on messing up time away is not time well spent time away encourages me to bad mouth encourages me to spit figuratively on someone else's lawn encourages me to
- [colour this](https://wordhabit.com/colour-this/) - did i hear you correctly? did you say "coloured"? did you refer to people of my colour as "coloured"? did you really do that? are you really that ignorant? i mean, yes, there are things we all don't know. there are things some of us may never know. but come on! really? coloured? perhaps it
- [liberia -- it's in my blood](https://wordhabit.com/liberia-its-in-my-blood/) - i've been doing research on liberia for an encyclopedia entry (yeah, i'm taking this writing thing seriously -- it's almost overwhelming me).* as i read, i find out things that confirm my memories and other things that make my head spin. i lived in such corruption, under its nose. i was sheltered just enough to
- [time well spent](https://wordhabit.com/time-well-spent/) - i've been missing my time spent with God so i hoped i'd wake early so i could talk to Him and read the bible and talk some more. so after my crazy nightmare was documented, we spent time in Acts 27. courage -- my pastor always asks me how my courage is. hope -- the
- [i'm so hungry](https://wordhabit.com/im-so-hungry/) - i was in my 2nd year of the MA program in english literature, the one thing i'd loved since birth it seemed. i transferred back to AU b/c my first year had been so hard at the public university -- i needed something familiar. during that first semester, i took a lit class that somehow
- [oh yeah!](https://wordhabit.com/oh-yeah/) - i've got good news and i'm so used to being formal with my speech that i can't even share it without sounding stuffed. i just deleted a sentence that i thought clearly expressed my happiness but please, who was i kidding. what i really want to say is: i'm getting published!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay, it's not my
- [why](https://wordhabit.com/why/) - am i still working on this proposal? because i didn't work enough in the past. and as much as i'd like to postpone tomorrow, the day when post offices reopen, the day when i can send a fax, the day when i have to tutor, to plan song service, to write an article... tomorrow is
- [use your words carefully](https://wordhabit.com/use-your-words-carefully/) - this record is broken broken is this record is this record broken? this broken is record record, this is broken broken, this record is this broken record is is this broken record? is broken record this? is record this broken? if 95% of what we say is foolish does that mean the other 5% is
- [the hilton -- the book](https://wordhabit.com/the-hilton-the-book/) - yes, i spent a night in the hilton at o'hare airport. i volunteered to fly out a day later so they treated me nice(ly). i had a conference room: a nice long table with 5 cushy chairs around it, a flip chart, a white board, a bed that came down from the wall, a 2-seater
- [less is love](https://wordhabit.com/less-is-love/) - some of us are still learning this, some of us already know and are living examples of it: less is more. or as i like to put it, less is love. as i help a friend with the final plans for her big day, i recognize the pressure to please, the pressure to save face,
- [i just](https://wordhabit.com/i-just/) - feel like writing something since it's been a while and all you who read this probably desire something new. i also want to talk about the power of sharing a good thing. we never know how the good thought we've received will impact someone else. why not share it? somehow we often don't. it's not
- [conversations](https://wordhabit.com/conversations-2/) - jasmine, a friend of a friend, returned my call this afternoon. she's a riot! when the conversation ended, i felt as if i'd just been refreshed. i finally made contact with tanya, after weeks of trying. as usual, we delved into discussions of the sda church, young adults, our angst, our anger, our revolutionary measures.
- [writing fever](https://wordhabit.com/writing-fever/) - so much has happened in the last 2 months. now i have a lull for just a couple of weeks. and in these 2 weeks, i have a lot of writing to do. i may get a poem published if the mag likes my revisions. i may finally actually finish my book. i may join
- [learning...slowly](https://wordhabit.com/learning-slowly/) - i'm learning slowly but surely, how to be an effective leader. i'm learning slooooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwlyyyyyyyyyyyy.
- [the flood](https://wordhabit.com/the-flood/) - so the steps from the garage into the basement decided to give way to water on friday. by night time, it's cold enough to stop the water flow but by mid-day, water and the basement floor become friends. i guess we'll have to dig down to the foundation and do some serious work. i envision,
- [friendster.com...because sometimes we must reconnect](https://wordhabit.com/friendster-com-because-sometimes-we-must-reconnect/) - so i've found long lost friends, and when i say long lost, i mean long lost! it's fabulous. the site is sometimes a time waster but the connections are worth it! yay for technology!
- [relief](https://wordhabit.com/relief/) - yes, i'm a writer and what do writers do? they write! come what may (or april or december or july)
- [belief](https://wordhabit.com/belief-2/) - if there's ever been a time that i've believed, that time is now. believed in what? you may ask. and i ask you, which is more important: that you believe or what you believe in?
- [chocolat](https://wordhabit.com/chocolat/) - i just saw the film for the first time. it was beautiful, and i don't use the "b" word often. if for just moments we all lived only to care for others and be honest in our love...if for just moments we all lived despite critical eyes and wicked tongues...if for just moments we all
- [another week...over](https://wordhabit.com/another-week-over/) - and all God's people said amen
- [stupid, stupid, stupid!](https://wordhabit.com/stupid-stupid-stupid/) - so here's part of the cover letter i submitted for a job i actually want. Being able to facilitate the growth literature is one thing in particular that I'm both passionate about and committed to. As I teacher, I've taught courses in speech and English and currently, I work as a tutor for an adult
- [i'm a bit out of it sometimes -- i'm an artist!](https://wordhabit.com/im-a-bit-out-of-it-sometimes-im-an-artist/) - i just realized that i probably appear out of it to some on many occasions. it's often cuz i'm smothered in thoughts and i'd rather spend time with them than talk to someone. i know -- a bit crazy, huh. well, it's me. spent good time at Kavaccino's again tonight! Massiel and i joked about
- [tears](https://wordhabit.com/tears/) - i spent the weekend at a women's retreat. had i not been asked to be part of the praise team, i wouldn't have gone. it's not something i'm drawn to. the thought of spending hours with estrogen makes me a bit weary. it was actually enjoyable for the most part. i wasn't ready for the
- [book done](https://wordhabit.com/book-done/) - yah, so i've finished writing My Inanition and now i'm working on a book proposal and looking for a publisher. i have no idea how to best go about it all so i'm seeking the help of a few friends and scanning the WWW ... is it bad to judge a publishing house by its web
- [How to trust your feelings without losing your mind - Part 3](https://wordhabit.com/how-to-trust-your-feelings-without-losing-your-mind-part-3/) - I just realized that I should say this: In order to be able to trust your feelings, you have to make sure that you're feeding your feelings appropriately. For example, if you're always tuned in to pop culture and nothing more, your feelings will probably be based on the ideas of people making a lot
- [How to trust your feelings without losing your mind - Part 2](https://wordhabit.com/how-to-trust-your-feelings-without-losing-your-mind-part-2/) - All this talk about me is so selfish. WHATEVER!!!!! All this talk about me is what I need. If I don't talk about me, I'll smack somebody. This past weekend, I went away. I took the Greyhound (yes I did) one hour north and sang with some friends for church. The weekend was a blessing
- [4 police dead; so is the killer](https://wordhabit.com/4-police-dead-so-is-the-killer/) - a drug bust gone nasty. happened earlier today northwest of edmonton, the city of champions. i feel bad for the families that have lost husbands, fathers, brothers, love. but i feel nothing for the police force. sound bad? perhaps. i don't wish harm to police but for all the bad many of them do, it's
- [daily preparation](https://wordhabit.com/daily-preparation/) - have your mornings ever prepared you for your days? mine often do, especially this morning. i've been reading one of my favourite books to start my day. it's a compilation of old writings by the likes of A Kempis and de Sales. this morning i read something that made me ask, "okay God, what's about
- [my day of birth](https://wordhabit.com/my-day-of-birth/) - today was my birthday. i'm now post 25! i'm dealing with it well so far. i think the journey will remain smooth. i anticipate good things ahead. more opportunities for growth and contentment. i'm lovin it! the day was peaceful. the only thing i didn't like was that i was very tired and couldn't work
- [enjoy](https://wordhabit.com/enjoy/) - a friend and i went to our local coffee shop, Kavaccinos, last night. it's a wonderful, non-chain establishment. we were there for about 3 and a half hours. fabulous! we wrote, we chatted, we read, we chatted, we wrote...and, oh yes, we sipped hot drinks. everyone should make time for writing or whatever it is
- [4-year-old innocence](https://wordhabit.com/4-year-old-innocence/) - http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6927845/?GT1=6190 now here's an example of living by your feelings.
- [How to trust your feelings without losing your mind - Part 1](https://wordhabit.com/how-to-trust-your-feelings-without-losing-your-mind-part-1/) - This post is not like the others. I've decided to capitalize the beginnings of sentences and the word "I" within each sentence...because I feel like it. Feelings allow me to do much of what I do every minute of every day. Perhaps that's because I don't have a conventional 9-5 and hardly anyone's telling me
- [together: reconnecting](https://wordhabit.com/together-reconnecting/) - the option of going to Japan enabled me to connect with someone i hadn't spoken to in a few years. we'd see each other and smile but that was it. but since speaking with her the other day, i feel more comfortable speaking to her as i did again last night and will do in
- [nope](https://wordhabit.com/nope/) - i woke up this morning and said no. as the day progressed, i felt more confident saying no and somehow i know i won't regret it. i'm staying put for the next 3 months. perhaps i'll be able to go another time...perhaps not. for now, it's Lacombe --Alberta, Canada...big sky country. and what matters is,
- [peace i do not know](https://wordhabit.com/peace-i-do-not-know/) - when i make big decisions, i pray about them and if i'm at peace with the thought of saying "yes" to something (especially when i've been really confused) then i'm confident that "yes" is right. i don't have peace at this moment. i'm going to spend the day getting more information. my next post will
- [can't intellectualize this](https://wordhabit.com/cant-intellectualize-this/) - i could go to Japan for 3 months and work in a daycare simply speaking English to children all day. i'd get paid nicely and not have to worry about paying for anything but half my plane ticket and food when i'm there: housing is fully taken care of. i could stay here for 3
- [20 days](https://wordhabit.com/20-days/) - there are 20 days till i'm 26. i'm feeling good about this b-day. just a few years ago i was 23. just a few years ago i was 19. and in just a few years i'll be 85. it'll always seem like "just a few" so i'd better spend each one wisely.
- [in love, speak](https://wordhabit.com/in-love-speak/) - it's hard to always say what's on your mind. you're not always sure if the truth will set you free. but when spoken in love, truth permits you entrance into peace. and peace helps you see the sun.
- [healing](https://wordhabit.com/healing/) - i heard Chris Rice sing tonight. it was beautiful. it was uplifting. it was what i needed to move on. funny how life cycles...
- [time frost death and blue](https://wordhabit.com/time-frost-death-and-blue/) - it's almost 9am. it probably will be by the time i finish writing this. i say that to say this: how much does time really matter? how does the way i live reveal what i think about time? i wake up every morning unconsciously confident that i'll make it through another day. but the frost
- [another day is over](https://wordhabit.com/another-day-is-over/) - and i've decided: that not watching tv is wonderful indeed that doing what i love is key that snow is only snow and below freezing temps are simply opportunities to wear more clothing and stay indoors that memories will hide, some never to be recalled that words...words are (finish this sentence)

## Pages

- [About (Theme)](https://wordhabit.com/about-theme/) - This is a theme template page created by Superb Addons. You can edit this page's content and its template. If the blocks you want to edit aren't in the page content, they're part of the template: open the page settings sidebar, click the template name under "Template", and choose "Edit template".
- [Bible Study: Meeting Jesus in the Gospel of Mark](https://wordhabit.com/biblestudymark/) - Lesson 1: Jesus Calls Ordinary People Question: Why would Jesus choose ordinary people? Read Mark 1:14–20 Mark 2:13–17 Notice Jesus takes the initiative. He calls fishermen and a tax collector—not religious experts. Following Jesus means learning from Him, not having everything figured out first. Discussion What stands out about the people Jesus calls? What do they
- [Informal-ish Writing](https://wordhabit.com/blog/) - Every now and then I write something that I want to share. This is what you'll find below. life What I’m currently reading Posted on September 15, 2026 I’ve become one of those 5-or-more-books-at-a-time readers. How? Sometimes I get a little bore… life 16 years Posted on April 17, 2026 Yesterday, April 16, 2026, was
- [About](https://wordhabit.com/aboutme/) - I am Michaela Lawrence Jeffery which means, in part, that I am a writer. I write about loss and the labored, slug-like movements of grief that we make when someone we love dies. There’s also... …the death of an eye. …the death of a fetus.…the death of love.…the death of (name your slug-inducing pain). I write about
- [Homepage](https://wordhabit.com/homepage/)
- [Podcast](https://wordhabit.com/podcast/) - Yes, I have a podcast called wordhabit that I periodically update. You can listen to wordhabit just about anywhere. Pick a platform and subscribe. AppleSpotify 1 + 100 Words One of the things I enjoy about podcasting is collaborating via the written words of my listeners. Here's my rationale: So often we try to condense
- [Monetize & Grow Your Academy](https://wordhabit.com/monetize-grow-your-academy/) - [masteriyo_courses category="monetize-grow-your-academy" order="ASC"]
- [Quotes](https://wordhabit.com/quotes/) - “She was an object lesson on the essential luck, whatever hardships may come their way, of those born able to make things.” Written about a painter in Somewhere Towards the End, a memoir on aging by Diana Athill.
- [My account](https://wordhabit.com/my-account/) - [woocommerce_my_account]
- [Dashboard](https://wordhabit.com/customer-dashboard/)
- [Privacy Policy Page](https://wordhabit.com/aboutme/privacy-policy-page/) - Who we are Our website address is: https://wordhabit.com. Comments When visitors leave comments on the site we collect the data shown in the comments form, and also the visitor’s IP address and browser user agent string to help spam detection. An anonymized string created from your email address (also called a hash) may be provided
- [Contact](https://wordhabit.com/contact/) - Connect Look for me via @wordhabit but I'll mostly be here. So subscribe and you'll get an email notification whenever I publish some words. Send a message
- [(mis)carriage](https://wordhabit.com/blog/miscarriage/) - (mis)carriage I've thought a lot about whether or not to move these posts from "draft" to "published" status and presenting them in this focused fashion. I've thought about the implications, the possibility that someone may find the package a bit sensational, Michaela screaming, "Look at me and my pain!" in some very unhealthy, attention-thirsty manner
- [On Being Savior](https://wordhabit.com/blog/on-being-savior/) - On Being Savior The following posts are all dedicated to the college students I've worked with through the years in Lacombe, AB, Chicago, IL, Berrien Springs, MI, Knoxville, TN and Athens, GA. #1: spare an angel #2: eye of the tiger #3: if i could #4: doubting thomas #5: fix you job description: part 1

## Categories

- [Uncategorized](https://wordhabit.com/category/uncategorized/)
- [less is more](https://wordhabit.com/category/less-is-more/)
- [life](https://wordhabit.com/category/life/)
- [writing challenge](https://wordhabit.com/category/writing-challenge/)
- [100 words](https://wordhabit.com/category/100-words/)

## Tags

- [100%](https://wordhabit.com/tag/100/)
- [advent](https://wordhabit.com/tag/advent/)
- [anxietyhelp](https://wordhabit.com/tag/anxietyhelp/)
- [Bible](https://wordhabit.com/tag/bible/)
- [birds](https://wordhabit.com/tag/birds/)
- [book](https://wordhabit.com/tag/book/)
- [chooseone](https://wordhabit.com/tag/chooseone/)
- [clarity](https://wordhabit.com/tag/clarity/)
- [contentment](https://wordhabit.com/tag/contentment/)
- [day1](https://wordhabit.com/tag/day1/)
- [day5](https://wordhabit.com/tag/day5/)
- [death](https://wordhabit.com/tag/death/)
- [differed](https://wordhabit.com/tag/differed/)
- [discovery](https://wordhabit.com/tag/discovery/)
- [dreams](https://wordhabit.com/tag/dreams/)
- [expectations](https://wordhabit.com/tag/expectations/)
- [faith](https://wordhabit.com/tag/faith/)
- [father](https://wordhabit.com/tag/father/)
- [friends](https://wordhabit.com/tag/friends/)
- [friendship](https://wordhabit.com/tag/friendship/)
- [funeral](https://wordhabit.com/tag/funeral/)
- [God](https://wordhabit.com/tag/god/)
- [grace](https://wordhabit.com/tag/grace/)
- [grief](https://wordhabit.com/tag/grief/)
- [health](https://wordhabit.com/tag/health/)
- [hearthealth](https://wordhabit.com/tag/hearthealth/)
- [history](https://wordhabit.com/tag/history/)
- [Holy Spirit](https://wordhabit.com/tag/holy-spirit/)
- [hope](https://wordhabit.com/tag/hope/)
- [Jesus](https://wordhabit.com/tag/jesus/)
- [joy](https://wordhabit.com/tag/joy/)
- [kioskstage](https://wordhabit.com/tag/kioskstage/)
- [lessismore](https://wordhabit.com/tag/lessismore/)
- [loss](https://wordhabit.com/tag/loss/)
- [love](https://wordhabit.com/tag/love/)
- [miscarriage](https://wordhabit.com/tag/miscarriage/)
- [motherhood](https://wordhabit.com/tag/motherhood/)
- [music](https://wordhabit.com/tag/music/)
- [pandemic](https://wordhabit.com/tag/pandemic/)
- [parenting](https://wordhabit.com/tag/parenting/)
- [peace](https://wordhabit.com/tag/peace/)
- [perfection](https://wordhabit.com/tag/perfection/)
- [podcast](https://wordhabit.com/tag/podcast/)
- [poetry](https://wordhabit.com/tag/poetry/)
- [prayer](https://wordhabit.com/tag/prayer/)
- [questions](https://wordhabit.com/tag/questions/)
- [race](https://wordhabit.com/tag/race/)
- [racism](https://wordhabit.com/tag/racism/)
- [rest](https://wordhabit.com/tag/rest/)
- [sadness](https://wordhabit.com/tag/sadness/)
- [sleep](https://wordhabit.com/tag/sleep/)
- [starthere](https://wordhabit.com/tag/starthere/)
- [startnow](https://wordhabit.com/tag/startnow/)
- [story](https://wordhabit.com/tag/story/)
- [time](https://wordhabit.com/tag/time/)
- [today](https://wordhabit.com/tag/today/)
- [tomorrow](https://wordhabit.com/tag/tomorrow/)
- [truth](https://wordhabit.com/tag/truth/)
- [tryagain](https://wordhabit.com/tag/tryagain/)
- [uncharted waters](https://wordhabit.com/tag/uncharted-waters/)
- [Uncle G](https://wordhabit.com/tag/uncle-g/)
- [unknowns](https://wordhabit.com/tag/unknowns/)
- [unrealistic](https://wordhabit.com/tag/unrealistic/)
- [urgent](https://wordhabit.com/tag/urgent/)
- [voice](https://wordhabit.com/tag/voice/)
- [whywaitfor2021](https://wordhabit.com/tag/whywaitfor2021/)
- [words](https://wordhabit.com/tag/words/)
- [writing](https://wordhabit.com/tag/writing/)
- [yourhere](https://wordhabit.com/tag/yourhere/)
- [racist](https://wordhabit.com/tag/racist/)
- [antiracist](https://wordhabit.com/tag/antiracist/)
- [40days](https://wordhabit.com/tag/40days/)
- [lead](https://wordhabit.com/tag/lead/)
- [whereallthewordsmatter](https://wordhabit.com/tag/whereallthewordsmatter/)
- [mlj](https://wordhabit.com/tag/mlj/)
- [wordhabit](https://wordhabit.com/tag/wordhabit/)
- [chatting](https://wordhabit.com/tag/chatting/)
- [fiction](https://wordhabit.com/tag/fiction/)
- [hopewriter](https://wordhabit.com/tag/hopewriter/)
- [podcaster](https://wordhabit.com/tag/podcaster/)
- [wordsaremyhabits](https://wordhabit.com/tag/wordsaremyhabits/)
- [writer](https://wordhabit.com/tag/writer/)
- [hopewriterlife](https://wordhabit.com/tag/hopewriterlife/)
- [storytelling](https://wordhabit.com/tag/storytelling/)
- [refresh](https://wordhabit.com/tag/refresh/)
- [plants](https://wordhabit.com/tag/plants/)
- [nonfiction](https://wordhabit.com/tag/nonfiction/)
- [parent](https://wordhabit.com/tag/parent/)
- [child](https://wordhabit.com/tag/child/)
- [growing](https://wordhabit.com/tag/growing/)
- [stages](https://wordhabit.com/tag/stages/)
- [reflections](https://wordhabit.com/tag/reflections/)
- [happy](https://wordhabit.com/tag/happy/)
- [Las Vegas](https://wordhabit.com/tag/las-vegas/)
- [reason](https://wordhabit.com/tag/reason/)
- [covid](https://wordhabit.com/tag/covid/)
- [long covid](https://wordhabit.com/tag/long-covid/)
- [post covid](https://wordhabit.com/tag/post-covid/)
- [Covid-19](https://wordhabit.com/tag/covid-19/)
- [#journey](https://wordhabit.com/tag/journey-2/)
- [wisdom](https://wordhabit.com/tag/wisdom/)
- [chaos](https://wordhabit.com/tag/chaos/)
- [picture of God](https://wordhabit.com/tag/picture-of-god/)
- [sabbatical 2024](https://wordhabit.com/tag/sabbatical-2024/)