i’m trying to plan ahead better. today, i realized another part of my time problem: as much as i like paying attention to detail, i don’t like to process the finer details necessary for executing my own stuff unless i really, really, really want to do something and it’s easy. and i’m seldom THAT interested. for example: i really want to get my exegesis paper done in the next two days but it’s not THAT important to me so it’s not even halfway done. on the other hand, i really, really, really want to improve my pool game so i play every day. it’s highly unlikely that pool will improve my seminary grades. but what’s primarily important to me right now is that i’m not at school. so i don’t really want to do ANYTHING that really matters (honestly). though i want to get them out of my hair, i don’t want to grade papers. though i want new frames, i don’t want to go to the vision store.
and, i want bite-sized things…exegesis isn’t bite-size neither is grading. getting glasses is easier coz my mum drove me there today. thankfully, i can check that off the list. but my mum isn’t holding my hand through all things (fortunately…or unfortunately) so i’ve got to get to the point where i can suck up my fatigue, my boredom, etc, and just do what needs to be done in a timely fashion.
so i won’t play pool today after all. i’ll get back to papers. oh, and let me add this. there is one project for a class that i’ve almost completed since being here. all we have to do is compile 24 articles, 8 of which have already been provided. i’ve almost finished collecting them and i’ll print them all when i get back to school (to save my parents the ink!).
…i guess this project makes me realize that even when i’m not tired i just want to do things (pertaining to me) that i know will end soon and simply. i grab 16 articles off databases, print them, punch 3 holes into them, stick them in a 2″ ring binder that’s divided up into 6 sections, add a graphically simple and visually pleasing cover page, and call ‘er good! i can see the steps in all their simplicity. nothing’s complicated. there’s very little room for error. the only horrible thing that may happen is that my printer runs out of ink. but the project isn’t due till 3 weeks from now so there’s time to buy more ink.
if i have to pay attention to the details in someone else’s life, i’m fine. that’s why it’s possible for me to have the part-time job i have. but if i have to pay attention to the details in my life, i’m exhausted by the mere idea, turned off by the possible glitches–i’m a dreamer.
so as much as i’d like a personal assistant, i don’t need one–i just need to slow down, develop a 5-step process for working through the many things that pop up. and i need that 5-step plan so that i don’t find myself where i presently am, with my hands in a multitude of projects/events/etc.